Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

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sunnyday
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Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by sunnyday » Wed Apr 25, 2012 6:51 pm

Feelings of disappointment, pain, and being alone are higher than normal for me today. I know there are positive ways out of this abyss. I have the Power of Now book and audiobook. How does one approach it...should I just start reading and listening.....

From those of experience, should I just dive in and try to stuff these feelings in a box...most things I have tried recently have only worsened the situation/feelings.

Thanks for any input

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Donna
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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by Donna » Wed Apr 25, 2012 11:47 pm

sunnyday wrote:...most things I have tried recently have only worsened the situation/feelings.

Thanks for any input
Hi sunnyday,

What things have you tried so far?

~ Donna
~*~*~*~* I love to live and live to love. *~*~*~*~

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Webwanderer
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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by Webwanderer » Wed Apr 25, 2012 11:53 pm

Here's my suggestion: works well for me.

Do not stuff your feelings in a box. That is only suppression that will likely come back to give you grief later. Rather, find ways to make peace with your emotions. They're only as bad as you believe them to be. Recognize that you are not your thoughts, nor are you your feelings. Both are important, but they are not you. You are consciousness, awareness. They are content within you that comes and goes. Understanding how repetition and focus on painful thoughts and feelings tend to anchor them within you is a good first start to getting free of their painful nature. But get clear on your true conscious nature and realize that thoughts and emotions are transitory content that is held in place by the focus of conscious energy.

Resting often in conscious, thought free presence, will help you distinguish between what you truly are and the experiences that pass through you. Spend frequent moments in this resting aware state so it becomes, and remains, familiar. When unpleasant thoughts are emotions arise, look for what they have to teach you and then let them go. Focus instead on the beauty and value in life. Focus on feelings of appreciation at every opportunity. Keep reading great works of inspiration such as Tolle and follow you inner guidance to where it leads next.

There is nothing in life that does not have value if we are just willing to look for it.

WW

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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by karmarider » Thu Apr 26, 2012 7:07 pm

sunnyday wrote:... should I just dive in and try to stuff these feelings in a box...most things I have tried recently have only worsened the situation/feelings.

Thanks for any input
You can try. But you'll find that you probably can't. Once the understanding comes that we are not who we take ourselves to be, this stuff becomes very compelling.

What's helped me through five years of spiritual seeking is a release technique. I use it often--it helps me to be with what is and glide through the rough spots. What's helped the most is the letting of go spiritual seeking--that's a different story.

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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by erict » Thu Apr 26, 2012 10:53 pm

Hi,

I would recommend several things:

First, remind yourself that this state of mind/being is only temporary.
I know it can feel like maybe things will not get better, and also from this place, when looking ahead, everything might seem utterly hopeless, meaningless and painful. But even though these states tend to overtake us (seemingly) completely, they are not permanent, and I feel it is important to recognize and remind yourself two things - this isn't really reality, it's just the perception of reality through a certain very negative, painful filter, and secondly, it will pass.

From the way you've expressed yourself, I feel you already have a certain degree of recognition of the feelings you're experiencing as merely feelings.

Secondly, shift your focus. If you're not able to accept or release, which I think most people actually are not able to do, then what you can do is shift your focus. The suffering comes from a certain emotional state of being which attracts/generates negative painful thoughts that resonate with something inside you (fear, pain, etc), and keeps creating suffering.
The more you can immerse yourself in activities that uplift you, the better you will feel. Whether it is the teachings of Eckhart Tolle, or really just about anything else, I don't think it matters.

Once you've started feeling better, you can take steps towards resolving the issues that have dragged you into the abyss. But first I think you need to do whatever you can to get relief, and get back into balance as much as possible.

Thirdly, remember the more you internally resist what you're experiencing, the more you will suffer. I've observed it myself, and of course Eckhart talks about it as well, internal resistance increases the suffering. The more you think that it isn't fair, or that you want it to stop, that you cannot take it, etc., the more something inside you is fighting against the suffering of the moment, the more the suffering will increase. As much as you can accept where you are, and what you are experiencing, and work from there.

Lastly, I believe that finding yourself inappropriately out of balance emotionally is an indication that change is necessary. The needed change may have something to do with certain external circumstances, or perhaps an internal change. Although on second thought, it's really an internal change either way. One that may or may no have an external component.
I feel that this is often, sadly, neglected and everyone is telling you to accept, make peace, etc. But just like with physical pain, yes it is better to accept it, make peace with it as much as possible, but never to forget to go ahead and find out what is causing it. The physical pain is an indication that something is wrong, and in most cases, it's something you will to and will be able to remedy through appropriate action. I believe emotional pain is the same, although more difficult to interpret, it arises to draw your attention that something is wrong and you need to take care of it if you possibly can.

Let me know if any of this resonates, and if any of it is helpful.
"Be sincere; don't ask questions out of mere interest. Ask dangerous questions—the ones whose answers could change your life."

Jbrooke
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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by Jbrooke » Wed May 16, 2012 3:51 am

karmarider,

You wrote:

What's helped me through five years of spiritual seeking is a release technique. I use it often--it helps me to be with what is and glide through the rough spots. What's helped the most is the letting of go spiritual seeking--that's a different story.[/quote]

Would you be comfortable elaborating on that? It really caught my attention. Thanks,
Jen

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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by karmarider » Wed May 16, 2012 4:25 pm

Jbrooke wrote:...Would you be comfortable elaborating on that? ...
Hi Jen,

Take a look at the technique here: http://www.beyond-karma.com/how-to/how- ... s-release/

I'll be happy to answer any questions about it.

k

Jbrooke
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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by Jbrooke » Thu May 17, 2012 4:56 am

Karmarider-

I am really grateful that you provided that reference and post. I visited the website and it truly speaks to me. I have found that the information and insights are so clear to me. Devoid of all of the semantics and labels and such. Rather forthright and much more comprehensible. Very valuable site. Thank you for letting me know about it!

Best,
Jen

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DavidB
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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by DavidB » Wed Jun 13, 2012 3:53 am

Emotions arise into present consciousness, which is when we become aware of them.

Emotions are the bodies response to either a thought, a memory, or an actual experience. The emotion arises as a response based upon past conditioning. As emotion has already arisen when we become ware of them, they always require validation, regardless whether or not they are appropriate to the given situation.

We validate emotions by allowing them to be as they are, without judgement, analyses or criticism. In this way the emotion loses any negativity that may have become attached to it through past conditioning.

Undoing painful or unnecessary suffering that has become attached to emotion, can potentially be a lengthy process, but if remain present and consistent in how we respond to emotions, the past conditioning can be dissolved and a new paradigm can emerge, not through coercion, but through unconditional acceptance. This is how we practice unconditional love.

We then have a choice as how we wish to deal with the situation which provoked the emotional response, to either see the emotion as a valid response, or to see the emotional as unnecessary for the given context. The unconscious mind will remember this sequence of events and relearn a new pattern of behavior.
“Wisdom is knowing I am nothing, Love is knowing I am everything, and between the two my life moves.” ― Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj

Jbrooke
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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by Jbrooke » Wed Jun 13, 2012 11:49 pm

DavidB,

I appreciate what you wrote about emotions and conditioning/reconditioning etc. I have to be blatantly honest here: I know that seeking relief isn't the way to go, but I pray that my emotional attachments can be changed. I know it can be a lengthy process, but I hope it will be in my lifetime, because I don't know if I can live this way much longer. And I am doing everything I can to remain present while responding to my emotions, but it isn't a consistent process and it doesn't always "work" and it feels pretty impossible at times. I do it when I am able. Just never feels like it's "enough" Not enough to unlearn and recondition, anyway. But I keep trying.

Some really good insights on this post. Thanks, everyone.

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DavidB
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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by DavidB » Thu Jun 14, 2012 12:38 am

I understand what you're saying Jbrooke.

I used to suffer from depression, panic attacks, generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety, existential anxiety, very low self esteem and a very poor self image. I used to hate myself and used to drink alcohol to try and wipe myself out. I've had 3 nervous break downs, I was miserable and my life was unbearable.

I admit that my initial motivations for seeking, were to find an end to the pain and suffering. So it was the pain and suffering which motivated me to seek, as I couldn't live with myself anymore. I didn't know at the time that I was really searching for presence, I was really searching for peace.

It took me at least 10-15 years to eventually find what I was looking for. That's not to say it will take you that long, as I started from scratch and had no clue about anything at all. I stumbled around for years trying all sorts of things, wasted many years trying to self medicate with alcohol and other drugs, were you have already come to the right place.

You are motivated to find what you are seeking, and if I can find that peace, then I'm pretty certain you can as well. :wink:
“Wisdom is knowing I am nothing, Love is knowing I am everything, and between the two my life moves.” ― Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj

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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by Ralph » Thu Jun 14, 2012 1:52 am

DavidB wrote:I admit that my initial motivations for seeking, were to find an end to the pain and suffering. So it was the pain and suffering which motivated me to seek, as I couldn't live with myself anymore. I didn't know at the time that I was really searching for presence, I was really searching for peace.
Just curious David, can you shed some light on .. what did it take for you to find this peace in the midst of all the pain and suffering you were going through ?

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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by DavidB » Thu Jun 14, 2012 4:47 pm

Ralph wrote:
DavidB wrote:I admit that my initial motivations for seeking, were to find an end to the pain and suffering. So it was the pain and suffering which motivated me to seek, as I couldn't live with myself anymore. I didn't know at the time that I was really searching for presence, I was really searching for peace.
Just curious David, can you shed some light on .. what did it take for you to find this peace in the midst of all the pain and suffering you were going through ?
Would love to shed some light Ralph, thanks for asking. :)

It's a long story actually, far too long for this post, so I'll try and sum it up briefly.

When I was about 21 I experienced my first nervous break down, which resulted in constant existential anxiety and depression. The type of anxiety I experienced was nothing short of hell, sheer terror. I'd experience panic attacks several times a day for many, many years. Regular bouts of deep depression. This lasted from about 21 until about 36.

The panic and the existential anxiety, although extremely painful emotionally, was also eye opening, sheer terror, but eye opening none the less. When I experienced the panic episodes, it was like reality had simultaneously exploded and imploded in my consciousness. My safe, familiar little world suddenly ripped in half exposing the absolute void while the infinite tried to rush in. It was terrifying. It's indescribable actually.

Many years of searching for a solution in many different places eventually taught me that this suffering was not going to be solved by someone or something, it was something I was going to have to come to terms with on my own, inevitably.

Why did I not just kill myself and get it over with? Because deep down inside, hidden in some deep recess of my consciousness, I knew that this was not the truth of reality, that there had to be a better way to live. I knew that this misery could not be my true state of being, there had to be another way to experience life, and I was determined to find it. In short, I wouldn't give up, no matter what. I can be pretty stubborn at times, I guess in this instance, it came in handy. :)

My first breakthrough occurred when I realized that the existential anxiety was only one perspective and that existential anxiety could also become existential joy. I discovered that the meaninglessness that haunted me could also be liberating and that rather than fight the anxiety and depression and see it as a problem to be eliminated, I offer those aspects of my self compassion and embraced what they had taught me about my self instead.

It wasn't easy and it took a long time but eventually I came to know peace. I think the greatest breakthrough came after a terrible panic episode which helped me to realized that all this time I was trying to escape from myself (huge light bulb moment). Escaping from the self is the one thing that is impossible. That's when my seeking ended.

Now, I love life. :)
“Wisdom is knowing I am nothing, Love is knowing I am everything, and between the two my life moves.” ― Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj

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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by Ralph » Thu Jun 14, 2012 7:15 pm

Thanks for sharing that David and again out of curiosity, what teachers, if any, did you follow that helped you along the way ?

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Re: Throw your life away depression and the Power of Now

Post by Webwanderer » Thu Jun 14, 2012 10:52 pm

When seeking ends, exploration can begin.

WW

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