DJ said: The most resistance I felt with the list you gave was any of it that took energy, therefore I feel a lack of that- energy. However, in the last day or so, I've tried to get my attention away from that, well kinda, until this morning when I almost called off from work, because I was so damn tired.
I hear you DJ, the more of those 'holidays' without leaving your body we have (being present to, and resting in the fullness of the moment) the easier the energy flows.
In that link Aunt Grace left a brilliant bath remedy
and her journaling gave her insight into her daily doings, but also expressing her deepest feelings and thoughts that might otherwise have been repressed.
She has another wonderful, brilliant thing in there that takes us out of laziness and self pity etc...
'I alone can take the initiative to escape the sarcophagus of self'.
For that alone her name ---- Grace ------ shines as a beacon. The notion of being tired comes from resisting or trying to dictate what is rather than fully being IN it.... and we only do this in the manner of projecting and/or protecting images of 'self'. That's why the letting go is like being on a roller coaster ride ----- try and even think of being tired
on one... we can't because we are fully (physically, mentally, emotionally) IN the ride.
Jen said: And DJ, I find that sometimes we are having a 'rest' that becomes almost tedious and boring, before the next big roller coaster ride starts
Welllll, hopefully I'll get a zap of energy before that happens, otherwise I might fall out of the coaster!
I have a feeling the coaster has rock solid straps - (or immense gravitational force) to hold you in --- screaming is optional, but ultimately doesn't change the course of the ride
Once you've been through these 'cycles' a few times you can notice ... or rather I've been through these cycles a few times now and notice the symptoms and take steps to pay homage to that part of the cycle, rather than carry on a routine that doesn't fit and creates resistance and the resultant tiredness.
I would suggest, be aware of your response to things if you can, ... when you look back to understand things you'll see they all have a path that led to 'here'.
Going against the 'flow' gives rise to frustration, unwillingness to go with the flow makes us build 'excuses' and holding onto them is also exhausting as we have to maintain the façade that we've built up in the 'sarcophagus of self'. All the reasons you didn't take a day to rest and relax from your job - sure we're too important, we're too irreplaceable, too responsible to do such a 'terrible' thing (& all the other 'lies' we tell ourselves - we'll lose our jobs, become homeless and not cope). It's all programmed BS and absolutely, it's tiring holding on like that. --- try it, list the 'reasons' and test them for honesty or ego/fear at work.
Letting go.... is when we reach the point and say the F.. it prayer - the quickest way to peace. It can be in large or small things and comes from the honesty of being aware of whether we are making our choices in awareness, capacity and willingness, and if not, which one of them are we abdicating.
It can be as small as going for a walk and deciding to go left four times before turning right and then just doing it, fully awake.
A really wonderful adventure began when I decided to 'let go' drove to a train station with my girls, got on the next train that arrived and just went with whatever arrived - it happened to be a train to a beach location, where a bus driver smiled at us, so we got on the bus, which took us to a ferry, which took us to an island, which took us to another bus, which took us to a lookout walk around a headland where whales and dolphins and sea eagles and and and were just BEING, and being beautifully... and what a wonderful day of surprise - in surprise we don't have expectations, we just ARE alive, it's food for the soul.
DJ, let surprises feed your soul.
Thanks for your post Treasure. It was a wonderful eclipse last night and from my vantage I got to see the whole thing. The stuff you're saying about the cross makes sense to me - heaven help me when Mars enters the picture lol!!!
Although that may be helpful for DJ to increase her energy levels.
I have an important meeting on the 23rd, and it's my brother's birthday, so we'll see what transpires - do you think I should gag myself, in case too much 'me' is too much (Mars is my ruling planet!!)
Well, off to the funeral... but with sad news there is always joyful news following hot on its heels, one of our former posters has just let me know that she's had a healthy baby boy - the circle of life....
Interestingly that news has my heart bubbling and silent tears falling that haven't with my friend's mum's passing.
Birth is important, life is important, death... less so.