Narcissism

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Re: Narcissism

Postby alex » Sun Aug 30, 2015 2:07 am

Alex said :
What do you think?


Well I just re-read that post and this is what I think - self obsession much!! Haha. Is just a focus on the story and not really needed - sure it helps to question the beliefs that create your story but being focussed on the story doesn't really get you anywhere. Over that!

Never underestimate the power of obsession! ;-)


A grave error indeed!!
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Re: Narcissism

Postby dijmart » Sun Aug 30, 2015 6:00 am

I think the word "trying" is the key here in ashley's post. Trying to stay present in the NOW is unnecessary, as the trying supposes that one is not already presently in the now and the now becomes a state which needs to be achieved. Consequently, the now becomes an elusive goal, as the obsession potentially creates frustration and disappointment when the goal cannot be achieved.


It's more of an allowing, then trying. Allowing the moment to be as it is... Becoming aware (usually after the fact) that one was " unconscious" while thinking, doing, ect. Is helpful or is/was for me to realize the difference and start "allowing" the isness of the moment to be as it is.

I went to an untraditional wedding reception tonight. It was uncomfortable, unorganized and a bit weird. There were uncomfortable feelings and thoughts that arose, that I witnessed. I did not react to any of it, but it was there. I stayed in the moment and the energy of it burned itself out with each thought and feeling that kept arising with each new uncomfortable thing going on. The nonreaction was interesting since in the past Im sure I would have insisted on leaving asap, but instead we were there a few hours. So, moral of the story...you may not find the present moment comfortable or likable, but it is what it is, in that moment and the mind can have a fit, but "YOU" can stay calm and cool...as the witness of it.
Take what you like and leave the rest.
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Re: Narcissism

Postby Onceler » Sun Aug 30, 2015 1:01 pm

alex wrote:Thanks for the link - Am I a narcissist? Hmm - I had a fairly traumatic experience which caused some deep low self worth. It sent me on a trajectory of trying to find validation through what others think of me, trying to find acceptance, being 'normal'. Is that narcissism? I'm fairly aware of how I operate in this manner. I definitely know I've got some pretty dark and fucked up conditioning but I don't know for sure if it makes me a narcissist? I know I have empathy - I can't watch people or animals suffering, i cry easily seeing sad stuff.I spent an entire Christmas Eve once bawling thinking about the poor little trackers around the world that wouldnt even get dinner that night.
What do you think?


I don't know you, but doubt you're a narcissist. We all have narcissistic traits, for sure. We are human with a very limited, self focused perspective built in. I think it's interesting that we value anti-narcissism.....that we even try to be selfless, thoughtful, kind and ego- free. I think if we even begin to think beyond our self and our conditioned notions of ourselves at the center of the world, we are doing well.

We all know that spirituality can be very self involved, ironically. It can look, from the outside, that someone is totally self absorbed, and honestly I believe it's a danger. Classic narcissists commit acts of manipulation on others to get what they want. I don't think that most folks in the spiritual world do this (besides the occasional megalomaniac guru), but our absorption can lead to acts of omission.....not paying attention to those we love and those around us as we obsess on certain inner phenomenon.

Are you like Donald Trump? :wink:
Be present, be pleasant.
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Re: Narcissism

Postby alex » Tue Sep 01, 2015 1:47 pm

but our absorption can lead to acts of omission.....not paying attention to those we love and those around us as we obsess on certain inner phenomenon.


Yes - it does seem to be a part of the journey - self obsession. I don't think it's a bad thing, quite natural probably. Self obsession is synonymous with suffering, a pretty good motivator to undo the workings that keep us locked in such a limited and boxed in perspective.

Are you like Donald Trump? :wink:


Well I'd have no idea - I'm Australian and don't watch TV. The snippets I've seen, I really hope not!

Thanks again.
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