ime223 wrote: ↑
Sat Mar 23, 2019 8:06 pm
I just want to get rid of all that forever and return to normal way of thinking and living. How can i live normally if i believe that reality is illusion? That self is false and so on..
I can relate, I have been through negative stages as well. That negative self talk is just trying to help you. Just realize, whatever you feel, is deep inside you, and while it is extremely painful to feel like you lost your self, just stop going to deep. The fact that you got to this point, it is to be commended, as you are trying to figure things out, however, in doing so it caused a lot of harmful stuff to occur (the negative self talk, ect).
I'd be happy to talk with you further, but realize you do not have to think anyway that is hurting you. Easier said then done, but, you can get back to yourself, just as you lost touch with yourself you can get back to it. Your feelings are basically trying to protect you, but the problem is our feelings can backfire on use as well.
Take some time to remember who you were, look at old photos, listen to music you enjoy, read old emails you wrote, ect, basically recover what you lost. I'd suggest talking to a counselor, get some guidance on finding yourself again. This Eckhart Tolle thing is nothing new, learning about ego has been going on for centuries, but he is coming from a place of trying to help others. Eckhart should really be also stating the negatives that could occur, as not everyone is cable of letting go, and everyone has a different tolerance level.
Realize you have this life and are lucky, even if it may seem like you're not. To have this life, you had a 1 in 400 trillion chance, and YOU made it!
We are all in this world together, just trying to make sense of it all. You are very precious, and if life becomes difficult and painful, step back from it, go back to it in small increments as needed, live to what works for you.
YOU do not have to listen to anything or anyone that makes you feel bad! You are valued and loved. Life can truly suck, and there's not much we can do about it, but we can have a choice on how we think, it is extremely difficult when our feelings hurt. Being in control of our feelings, especially the negative ones you are having, can be accomplished. But just like anything, it takes time and practice, do a little each day, get back to your self, you can do it, that was you up until this point, so get it back! You can! Even if it's a little each day, and try to laugh, watch or listen to things that will make you laugh. Laughing will sooth that pain. It is in fact that laughter is medicine, and will release hormones, ect, and we will benefit, so try to do this more. Through this laughter, when you're done laughing, realize how special you are, and through this try to remember who you are little at a time.
Wishing you the best!
I know I don't know you, but I love your life, it is special and worth taking care of it to the best you can.