Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

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lupin_
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Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

Post by lupin_ » Wed Dec 19, 2007 4:59 pm

I'm a student studying in college right now and last night I received my results for the semester that had just finished. Unfortunately my results weren't that great, one subject I failed by 1 point and another I failed by a fairly large margin. In the past I would have looked at the results and thought about day and night with constant emotions that fluctuates between anger and sadness. But having read The PON I realized the states I would have ventured into and knowing that they are negative, I blocked out the emotion by being more "conscious". When I'm more "conscious" I didn't think about my results , in fact when I'm more conscious it's hard to describe but it's sort of like a feeling knowing that it's something that transcends the mind but what i found weird was that whenever i refocused my thinking patterns upon my semester results again I would be feeling the negative emotions. At this point I wasn't really sure If i should continue to become more "conscious", I mean could it be possible that if I continue to become more "conscious" that I am just suppressing my emotions? The emotions are still there if i dwell on it and I have choice to dwell on them or not but what I'm afraid is, could there be a negative effect upon my psyche if i keep suppressing my emotions by being more conscious? What will be the long term effects be if i keep doing this? Is it safe?

So that's my story, what do you guys think I should do? Did i make a mistake somewhere?

D'ray
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Re: Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

Post by D'ray » Wed Dec 19, 2007 5:21 pm

I agree on this. But I'm speakless about this subject. In the past if I got bad grades I usually studied much harder to the next tests to get better grades.

Emotions don't motivate me anymore so much, but what I want to get -- I will make A LOT of work to accomplish it. If this makes any sense: Aften PON I knew what I wanted more clearly and I pursue to get them more directly than before when I was just "hanging on there".
There's no "I" to become enlightened. The "I" can have spiritual experiences.

DON'T resist the RESISTANCE! The resistance is there. Walk into it. Feel it. Become one with it.

lupin_
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Re: Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

Post by lupin_ » Wed Dec 19, 2007 5:42 pm

Yes I know what you are saying, I too have come to realization that I don't want to continue to pursue in my current endeavors anymore as they hold no significance for what I can contribute and how I want to spend the next chapter of my life. But the funny thing is that , I don't have a clear idea as to what I want to do next. It hasn't hit me in the face yet and I guess the only thing I can do now is to continue to just experience everything until something hits.

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Kutso
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Re: Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

Post by Kutso » Wed Dec 19, 2007 8:21 pm

lupin_ wrote: The emotions are still there if i dwell on it and I have choice to dwell on them or not but what I'm afraid is, could there be a negative effect upon my psyche if i keep suppressing my emotions by being more conscious? What will be the long term effects be if i keep doing this? Is it safe?
You should not supress your feelings. That is bad. REALLY bad. So don't do that. But being conscious has nothing to do with supressing feelings or thoughts. Actually, being counscious/present is totally the other way around.
When you are present you feel your emotions and see your thoughts fully. You see them just for what they are, just thoughts and emotions, nothing else. And with that comes a great sense of peace. For example, if someone close to you dies and you are being fully present, it does not mean that you are happy. You might still be sad, but you are fully aware of it and you don't take those sad feelings for anything else but feelings. And with that comes a great sense of peace.
So, you should continue to practice presence. You will find that the emotions you feel will vanish quite quickly when being present in the now.

Kutso
Not that. Not that. Not that. Not that. Not that. Not that. Not that. Not that.

weichen
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Re: Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

Post by weichen » Wed Dec 19, 2007 8:32 pm

Emotion going down can come from two sources:
1. you put attention on something that is outside the subject (failed grades), e.g. sex, game. This is called suppression.

2. you put attention in a broader scope, the whole universe, totality, pure stillness.
I would not label the second approach as "suppression", it is facing that (failed grades), but see it from a broader perspective, the failed grades does not matter as much in a bigger picture. Thoughts may come up such that you have choosed the wrong major, or a bachelor degree is not a good idea for you (you could start your own business right now, you could self educate as Tony Robbins). These insights are still related to the failed grades, but come from a bigger perspective.

lupin_
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Re: Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

Post by lupin_ » Thu Dec 20, 2007 6:21 am

thank you for the replies, they were very insightful. You know while reading the responses I got an impression that if I were to be able to control my emotions and thoughts that is to become more present, I'll be able to accomplish anything without negative emotions having to burden me in any way. Such a thought is really liberating and it motivates me more to continue practicing being more present minded.

thanks again for directing me in the right direction.

Foxtrot
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Re: Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

Post by Foxtrot » Fri Dec 21, 2007 12:57 am

But having read The PON I realized the states I would have ventured into and knowing that they are negative, I blocked out the emotion by being more "conscious".
I think you are just misinterpreting the experience a little. In the beginning, when one first starts becoming more aware or conscious, you are not supressing emotions, rather negative emotions just do not arise as they did before. Many share this concern initially. I know I did. The old dysfunctional mental\emotional pattern that would normally kick in and create the feelings of anger and sadness are not on automatic as in the past, but can arise if you dwell on them, as you experienced yourself. What you are experiencing is a break in the old and a glimpse of the new, and you are at a point of choice. Stay concious and no suffering or go unconscious and suffer, your choice. You do not need to get yourself upset emotionally and obsess mentally, to see you need to make some changes in the way you apply yourself in school to get better grades. Study a little more, party a little less (or alot less), seek out others who may understand the subjects to help you a little, whatever action you need to take, take it.

It may seem a little awkward in the beginning because you only ever new one way to handle this type of situation, but now you are beginning to see a new, more functional way. Relax, you are not supressing, you are transforming. Stay awake.

lupin_
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Re: Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

Post by lupin_ » Fri Dec 21, 2007 9:39 am

I had a feeling deep down that i was doing the correct thing, but having read your reply it just reassures me that I am going in the correct direction. Thanks heaps :)

Sw Anand Devagni.
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Re: Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

Post by Sw Anand Devagni. » Fri Dec 21, 2007 5:24 pm

In my opinion, 'suppressing emotions' and 'being more conscious' are two mutually exclusive concepts. I cannot understand how you can 'be more conscious' by suppressing something. On the contrary, you are less conscious of it - because you push it into the unconscious!

My suggestion is reading the sections 'The Background Unhappiness' and 'The Secret to Happiness' in A New Earth.

OK? If you haven't got the book, I'll explain it to you, OK?

Dan x

lupin_
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Re: Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

Post by lupin_ » Mon Dec 24, 2007 9:04 am

I have a better understanding of this issue now thanks to all the replies which have been very supportive and helpful. In retrospects I was a little anxious and wanted clarification on whether I was doing the correct thing but I realize that what I was doing wasn't actually suppressing emotions, that was the mind hypothesizing on negative future projections that "could" arise. I go through this pattern sometimes and sometimes I'm completely oblivious to it, but as I have been growing on my consciousness I realize the same pattern arises and it's merely just the mind spitting out its negativity.

Being conscious and present minded is the way to go. It's something that transcends mind and can only be felt and the way it's done is to disassociates from the mind by becoming the observer.

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Suzanne
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Re: Supressing Emotions and being more Conscious

Post by Suzanne » Sun Dec 30, 2007 2:37 am

Dear lupin,
I applaud you for thinking about your life deeply at so young an age. If you continue to do that, some day you'll find yourself where you feel you belong. Many young people don't know their direction at your age, so, don't beat yourself up about that, but don't waste the college tuition and hard work on the wrong subject, either.

Community colleges are for young people who haven't found their passions and are still sniffing out the possibilities. Try taking a few courses that interest you and doing a little real world work in a field that interests you. If you can't get work in a field you like, volunteer in it until someone decides to keep you around and pay you.

Let it happen organically, one day at a time, one footfall at a time. That is being in the moment. At your age, you shouldn't have tremendous bills or children or household responsibilities. This part of your life is for experimentation, so go into it fully and enjoy not knowing how it will turn out.

Someday when you have a spouse and kids and bills and deadlines and bosses, and a mortgage and taxes to pay, you'll look back on these carefree days with nostalgia. Enjoy them. You're not on one path yet, you're still open to many paths. That's honest and OK.

Let us know when something "happens!"

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