And what about sex?

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Kae
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And what about sex?

Post by Kae » Thu Jun 17, 2010 3:07 am

...And everything that comes with it, lust, the sex drive, longing, relationships, being young and horny, the sex drive being the primal life source within us, etc...

I find it interesting how everyone of the books on spirituality that I've read seem to avoid this topic. And still it is one that is a big part of our lives.

How to deal with the sex drive?

Am I wrong in wanting to have much sex?

Am I wrong in wanting to have sex with many different partners?

Sometimes the longing for sex is accompanied by a feeling of need, as in "I need a girlfriend", "I need attention and feedback from somebody from the other sex", "I need to get laid" - and obviously, this longing thus reveals itself to be of the ego, since only ego knows need.

But still, I know that the sex drive is a powerful and beautiful energy, that we need to honour and cherish.

When is the sex drive ego and when is it purely that beautiful source of life energy?

What would an "enlightened" individual behave like, sexually? What would he/her do when he/she got horny? Would he even get horny...?

Those are just some thoughts I've been wondering... :roll:
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kiki
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Re: And what about sex?

Post by kiki » Thu Jun 17, 2010 3:46 am

I suggest you look into Barry Long's teaching; he seems to be pretty much into the sexual side of awakened living.
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RCharles
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Re: And what about sex?

Post by RCharles » Thu Jun 17, 2010 6:54 am

Does an enlightened person stop eating, sleeping, eliminating? Of course not! Those are basic life drives, and so is sex. People get hungry, and people get horny, no matter how enlightened they may be. Your view of sexual ethics and how you choose to deal with your sexuality may change with enlightenment, but I am confident sex drive remains.

RC
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monmonn
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Re: And what about sex?

Post by monmonn » Thu Jun 17, 2010 10:34 am

When an enlighten person gets sex its more to do from being a reward for being yourself rather then being a 'ego-victim' and having that need to have sex to feel fulfilled and thus suffering when you dnt get it or making an identity out of ur sexual experiences :)

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Mouse
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Re: And what about sex?

Post by Mouse » Thu Jun 17, 2010 12:25 pm

Now really everybody! No one has mentioned Love!

The most valuable self knowledge is the knowledge of what is sex and what is love.

As Barry Long has gone into to this fully I recommend these articles for starters:
http://www.barrylong.org/statements/purposelove.shtml
http://www.barrylong.org/statements/love1.shtml

From my own experience sex is separation and love is union. Sex is selfish, love is giving. Sex is holding on, love is not possessing.
Once one gets the idea it comes down to sex is my self, love is being. The sexual love of my opposite polarity is absolutely fundamental in the discernment of self, because the pleasure generated is like a honey pot for self (aka the spoiler of the good). Up it comes and there is separation, free of it I know a blessed union and absence of self.
I have been inspired by Barry Long's teaching and I write this so as to acknowledge my source of inspiration. It is a wonderful help, and it is a wonderful gift.

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Kutso
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Re: And what about sex?

Post by Kutso » Thu Jun 17, 2010 1:14 pm

So many questions about this and that. So many concepts about how a "spiritual" person should behave. Why not be what you are and do what you do? If sex is needed, go out and get sex. If not, fine. Accept whatever comes, it is alright.
Not that. Not that. Not that. Not that. Not that. Not that. Not that. Not that.

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Kae
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Re: And what about sex?

Post by Kae » Thu Jun 17, 2010 3:06 pm

RCharles wrote:Does an enlightened person stop eating, sleeping, eliminating? Of course not! Those are basic life drives, and so is sex. People get hungry, and people get horny, no matter how enlightened they may be. Your view of sexual ethics and how you choose to deal with your sexuality may change with enlightenment, but I am confident sex drive remains.

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Re: And what about sex?

Post by Kae » Thu Jun 17, 2010 3:08 pm

I think Mouse has a good point there... It would probably with more love.

And joy... That's what I've been trying to install in myself... I ask myself when I feel sexual feelings or have sex, "Am I doing it with joy?"... "Is the experience accompanied by lightness and joy?"
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Re: And what about sex?

Post by RCharles » Thu Jun 17, 2010 7:01 pm

Very nice posts, mouse and kae. What you said is what I was implying when I said your sexual ethics may change. Urges remain, but you deal with them in a more enlightened, loving, and benevolent way. :)

Because you are conscious, you can choose how and when to give expression to sexuality, just like you can choose how and when to express emotions rather than being controlled by them.

RC
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Re: And what about sex?

Post by gen6 » Thu Jun 17, 2010 7:12 pm

Kutso wrote:So many questions about this and that. So many concepts about how a "spiritual" person should behave. Why not be what you are and do what you do? If sex is needed, go out and get sex. If not, fine. Accept whatever comes, it is alright.
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Re: And what about sex?

Post by olive » Fri Jun 18, 2010 3:01 am

Here's a quote from Nisargadatta Maharaj:

Sex is an acquired habit. Go beyond. As long as your focus is on the body, you will remain in the clutches of food and sex, fear and death. Find yourself and be free.
Realization must be amidst all the turmoils of life. ~Ramana Maharshi

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Re: And what about sex?

Post by snowheight » Fri Jun 18, 2010 6:14 pm

Before enlightenment sex is good.

After enlightenment sex is better.

As far as guilt goes ... sex does have consequences, so it is the acting on impulse after adopting a life-situation not driven by conditioning that is actually an interesting open-ended question to ponder.
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Re: And what about sex?

Post by Lopoe » Sat Jun 19, 2010 4:58 pm

Sexuality is neither good nor bad, it just is. Stop judging or categorizing what is natural. We have to eat and drink, sometimes we are happy, sometimes we are angry, we are born and get older, we have sexual desires, we think. The only rule is to accept the true divine, nature, god whatever you want to call it. And we are a part of nature, we are part of the divine. Our mind, with all the conditioned concepts of humanity is not worthy to question what is. Even Barry Long, Osho and all these so called "spiritual teachers" fall back into old schemes and value systems. For example Long's mental models about love or his rejection of homosexuality etc. It's just not necessary.

Just stop following spiritual teachers, religions or ideologies. My best spiritual teacher is nature including my own nature, my body, feelings and desires. I have a cat, too, and she's totally free of mental concepts. Great to "learn" from her, but she does not promise me enlightenment...

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kodeone
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Re: And what about sex?

Post by kodeone » Sat Jun 26, 2010 7:32 pm

Bring on the sex!! and the curries, beer, dope and whatever else you feel like doing, just know yourself beyond the mind made me thats all.
Recognise the basic space of pure awareness that sees and knows all phenomena.

Love is whats looking! Not a "me"...

Any women out there need some sexual healing pm me immediately!

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Re: And what about sex?

Post by SirNikalot » Sat Jun 26, 2010 11:55 pm

kodeone wrote:Bring on the sex!! and the curries, beer, dope and whatever else you feel like doing, just know yourself beyond the mind made me thats all.
Recognise the basic space of pure awareness that sees and knows all phenomena.

Love is whats looking! Not a "me"...

Any women out there need some sexual healing pm me immediately!
Well that certainly is a radical view I haven't heard on these boards!! I don't understand what the least bit sinful is of eating curry though.... And come on, no girl will pm you for "sexual healing"

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