Spirituality Jokes

A place for anything that doesn't fit into the existing forums

Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby autumnsphere » Tue Jun 21, 2011 11:30 pm

erict: You gotta be careful with spiritual people. You try to insult them, and they take it as a compliment! :lol: :lol: :lol:
Forget spiritual practice - just do drugs!
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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby anewmirth » Sun Jul 10, 2011 1:58 am

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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby anewmirth » Sun Jul 10, 2011 10:31 pm

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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby anewmirth » Tue Jul 12, 2011 1:32 pm

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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby Rick » Wed Jul 13, 2011 3:23 am

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A father is in church with three of his young children, including his five year old daughter. As was customary, he sat in the very front row so that the children could properly witness the service. During this particular service, the minister was performing the baptism of a tiny infant. The little five year old girl was taken by this, observing that he was saying something and pouring water over the infant's head. With a quizzical look on her face, the little girl turned to her father and asked, "Daddy, why is he brainwashing that baby?"
Daily life IS spiritual exercise.
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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby anewmirth » Wed Jul 13, 2011 12:31 pm

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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby karmarider » Wed Jul 13, 2011 1:20 pm

I think I saw this in a movie—A Jesuit priest in 1800’s goes to the Canadian wilderness to straighten out the brown people, the unfortunate heathens, and the Jesuit tells them of the hell-fire fury they’ll suffer if they don’t get on board, and this one aborigine, trying to follow the faith, asks if he’ll be punished for his sins before the Jesuit shoveled his truth at him, and the Jesuit said with brimming compassion, no no no God does not punish you if you don’t know they are sins, and the native said, logically, then why did you tell me?
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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby anewmirth » Wed Jul 13, 2011 10:37 pm

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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby anewmirth » Thu Jul 14, 2011 10:42 am

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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby anewmirth » Thu Jul 14, 2011 11:11 pm

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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby anewmirth » Fri Jul 15, 2011 8:51 pm

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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby anewmirth » Sat Jul 16, 2011 11:06 am

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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby ashley72 » Sat Jul 16, 2011 11:45 am

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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby ashley72 » Sat Jul 16, 2011 11:53 am

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Re: Spirituality Jokes

Postby ashley72 » Sat Jul 16, 2011 12:09 pm

A new young priest, Father Fever, has just arrived at the "Holy Saints of Sack-cloth" monastery. After a couple of weeks he is feeling so disturbed by sexual fantasies that he goes to see the father superior, old Father Fornicate, aged ninety-five.

"Ah, Father," cries Fever, "I am deeply troubled by impure thoughts, and sexual temptations come crowding into my mind -- things like doggie-style and sixty-nine, French ticklers and satin panties with pictures of Jesus on them! The more I try to resist them, the more they crowd into my mind."

"Hmm," says Father Fornicate, adjusting his robe. "So what would you like to know?"

"Well," replies Father Fever, perspiring, "you are ninety-five years old and one of the most ancient relics of the church -- tell me, how old do you have to be before you are released from the lusts of the flesh?"

"Hmm," says Father Fornicate, eyeing the young priest. "It takes many years of self-torture and holy prayer before your mind is cleaned of all such wickedness."

"Really?" asks the young priest. "How many years?"
"Well," replies old Fornicate with a sigh, "I can tell you that it is more than ninety-five!"
 
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