Pilou, a lost soul ...

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Pilou, a lost soul ...

Postby pilou » Thu Feb 14, 2013 9:09 pm

Hello,

I found this forum by typing "forum Eckhart Tolle" on the search toolbar, I wasn't sure that it exists, but I'm glad it does. Well, the important point it's not how have I found this forum, but why would I search for it? and the answer to that qustion will also be a way to introduce myself.

I'm a lost soul, completly drown into unconscious state, I've been aware of this for some years now, in fact, since I was 12. I'm 23 now, and every day I just sink deeper and deeper into unconsiouness.

One year ago, a friend of mine talked to me about Eckhart Tolle, and when I read his book, i felt like for the first time there is someone who understands me, and who succeded to step forward in his life, and to take control of his mind and life.

Even though I agree with every word Eckhart Tolle says in his book, I'm unable to apply his teachings. It's getting worse, lately i've been feeling like it's me against the whole world, my mind is controling every little action I do, I'm always thinking, even when sleeping. I'm getting more and more stubborn, no matter what other says, I refuse to hear them, I always have to argue with them and give right to myself. Today I even shouted at one of my colleages just because he said hi to me, and shouted at another one because he didn't agree with me.

I don't feel a second of "the now", I'm always thinking of the futur or regretting the past and looping it over and over in my head.

I started re-reading "the power of now", but I need something more, that's why i've searched for that forum, so that I learn from your experiences, and also to get in contact with conscious souls.

Finally, I precise that I'm from France, so I might express myself badly using english, please bear with it and feel free to correct my spelling or grammar mistakes.
Last edited by pilou on Fri Feb 15, 2013 12:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Pilou, a lost soul ...

Postby Webwanderer » Thu Feb 14, 2013 10:01 pm

Welcome to the forum pilou. There are lots of good threads here to offer insight into your experience. I encourage you to explore them.

pilou wrote:I'm a lost soul, completly drown into unconscious state,

Well that's not so completely so as you might imagine. That you found your way clear enough to seek out this forum is evidence of that.

I don't feel a second of "the now",

Or maybe it's that you don't quite recognize how pervading the 'now' is. There really is nothing else. The past and the future only exist as memories and imaginings. But that remembering and imagining takes place in the now. It really just a matter of focus of attention. You can focus on thoughts, which tend to be a distraction, or you can focus on what you feel - including senses and emotions. Touch your keyboard or desk or laptop. Feel its texture, its temperature. Get a real sense of it without adding in mental descriptions. That's a now experience.

Now go through all your senses and perceive sound, and taste, and smell, and visuals. Touch things and listen and observe - not to analyze, categorize, or identify, but to experience the infinite variety of form for itself, on its own terms.

Experience is felt - through the five physical senses, the emotions, and is also perceived from a conscious perspective. Paying close attention to any of these, or combinations of them, without trying to analyze or label them, will bring you to a now awareness.

Breathing purposefully will also help a great deal. Take 5 or 10 deep, connected, breathes and perceive the experience, again without labeling or analyzing it. Just experience the feeling heightened awareness.

Do these little experiments a few times and the nature of 'now' will become clearer. It's not really that big a deal. It's just a shift in perspective from thought to experience.

Once you recognize it more easily, you can begin to build upon it in ways that can enhance and bring a great deal of joy and happiness to your life.

WW
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Re: Pilou, a lost soul ...

Postby treasuretheday » Thu Feb 14, 2013 10:20 pm

Hi Pilou! Welcome! I'm new here too. I've already learned a lot though! These boards are very interesting & helpful.
pilou wrote: I'm getting more and more stuborn, no matter what other says, I refuse to hear them, I always have to argue with them


The awareness of the stubbornness that is there is the true you. ((You are not so lost afterall!)).

I look forward to reading your posts. I'm sure you will benefit from reading others' threads, & will make valuable contributions as well.
Life itself is the proper binge.
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Re: Pilou, a lost soul ...

Postby kiki » Thu Feb 14, 2013 11:03 pm

Let's get the very heart of the matter since you put to words the very core of your dilemma in your thread title - you label yourself as a "lost soul." Take some time to examine this belief, this assumption that you are a lost soul, by looking for this "you" you believe yourself to be.

Actually sit down, close your eyes and see if you can find a separate and distinct entity that is "you." Look for this entity and see what is found. If you do this you will find all kinds of ideas about the "me", but those are only ideas which are constantly changing. Can you possibly be an idea? You will notice sensations and emotions, but those are only sensations and emotions that are in constant flux. Can you possibly be something that comes and goes? So, first find out what you are not.

What else is present during this examination? What is the ever present "something" that witnesses all of this? (No need to even give that "something" a name). Could it just be that "you" are that? Has that ever not been present? What's it like when you simply rest in that? Are there any problems then? Find out.

Discover how "problems" are created by noticing the machinations of thinking (and don't think you have to get rid of thinking). As it is now you are giving thoughts power by believing what they are saying. Are you obligated to believe any of them? Is there some authority that will throw you in jail if you choose not to believe any of them? Very simply, there is no inherent power in thought itself unless it is given the energy of belief. Why not turn off the power by depriving those thoughts of all energy of belief in them? See what happens when you do that.

Take some time every day to simply sit without intention of getting anything out of it. Just sit and "be", without expectation of anything at all. You can even do this while walking outside. Let your senses be filled with what you encounter, unencumbered by any label or judgment. Just be with "what is" as it is (not how you wish it would be) and eventually you will discover what you are.

By the way, welcome to the board,

kiki
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Re: Pilou, a lost soul ...

Postby pilou » Fri Feb 22, 2013 2:25 am

Thank you for your replies. I did the right thing by registering into this forum.
I've been reading your advice over and over again.

Webwanderer wrote:But that remembering and imagining takes place in the now. It really just a matter of focus of attention.

Thank you, I've waisted a lot of time feeling guilty over my distraction by the past and the futur. your sentence just put an end to that feeling.

Webwanderer wrote:Now go through all your senses and perceive sound, and taste, and smell, and visuals. Touch things and listen and observe - not to analyze, categorize, or identify, but to experience the infinite variety of form for itself, on its own terms.

Can't do this. I tend to identify what I'm feeling.
There are those few times when I managed to focus on the present, where all my senses were awaken. But it wasn't planned. I think that I can't do this exercice correctly right now because I'm focusing on the idea of "not thinking, not analysing."

Kiki wrote:What else is present during this examination? What is the ever present "something" that witnesses all of this? (No need to even give that "something" a name). Could it just be that "you" are that? Has that ever not been present? What's it like when you simply rest in that? Are there any problems then? Find out.

Manged to do that, it was reaaally peaceful.

Kiki wrote:Discover how "problems" are created by noticing the machinations of thinking (and don't think you have to get rid of thinking). As it is now you are giving thoughts power by believing what they are saying. .

I don't seem to accept completely what you are saying, maybe I'm still showing some resistance to the idea of getting rid of problems. Some of my problems are not from thinking, but just reactions to other people's actions. I don't analyse their actions (or so I think) but i just can't stand in front of them without reacting, or without feeling anything.

Thank you again.
I've been reading other threads in the forum, they're really interesting !
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