The end of your world

I just love Adya and I think he deserves his own forum.

The end of your world

Postby BradD » Tue Oct 28, 2008 7:54 am

This is a great cd set by Adya, the best so far I reckon.

There was an interesting thing he said about meaninglessness and being stuck in it on cd 3, which im just wondering if any of you guys have experienced since your initial 'experience of awakening', shall we say.

I'll share how its gone for me so that you might understand better where im coming from.

There was the initial experience of "oh my god ive been doing WHAT for HOW LONG? ha!"

Then there was a second wave of just resting in something for a few months which was the most exciting time of my life, I woke up every morning with a sense of excitement about what was going to happen in the day ahead.

And that's totally fine, I know experiences come and go, however, even in the middle of the nice experiences, there was a sense that this wasn't all of it.

Now for the last few months, i've become rather depressed and have been stumbling around trying to find meaning, its a very dry, very bland sort of depression of sorts, but its different, because I still have the sense of "just keep moving, this is just how it has to be". It's quite frustrating for my family and friends, and not to mention me, when I'm in this state of mind because I know I'm doing it, and its almost like I'm acting it out, yet I still do it?

I know I'm acting depressed and bland, but the passion for everything has just gone, there's just a sense of not caring about anything that i used too, and what's more is i keep feeding this thing, every day, and i know I'm doing it. haha I'm sure I sound crazy. But really I cant talk to anyone about it because they probably will think i HAVE gone crazy, hence why I'm talking to you guys on here.

Adya describes this perfectly, it really hit the nail on the head when he talked about it, its such a relief of sorts to know that someone knows this feeling, of total confusion, because it's the weirdest feeling in the world and it's hard to describe.

I'm just wondering if any of you guys have had similar experiences like this? Sorry if I didn't make sense, like I said, it's hard to describe, but I'm sure someone out there knows what I might be talking about!

Geese this sounds like one of those adolescent "our changing body's" talks. haha
:D
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Re: The end of your world

Postby tod » Tue Oct 28, 2008 9:38 pm

It sounds as if you are putting a negative spin onto emptiness. Emptiness is not depressing, nor does it have any meaning. It is just empty.
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Re: The end of your world

Postby letitgo » Tue Oct 28, 2008 11:56 pm

Hello BradD,

I would have to say that I do relate to what you are saying even though I haven't studied Adya and would be interested in hearing more specifics on what he has to say on this subject.

There are periods of time for me that I am so distant from anything I can identify with that I feel very "blah", for lack of a better phrase. Even though I realize it as a very obvious dilemma. All my old tools are gone. All my old beliefs are gone. Even most of my thought processes don't even bother to wander through! It's kind of like, "What now... is this it?" I would best describe it in retrospect as my ego waiting for the other shoe to drop. Kind of hanging around but not willing to get on board. All it's other emotions are a bit too obvious, so let's try boredom.

It has become less and less of a dilemma for me, but I did spend some time and effort, drawing new and higher emotions and beliefs with which to fill what I perceived as a gap. It may be helpful for you to meditate on some high and light emotions such as unconditional love, but I think I'm outvoted on this forum on that subject. Most will say to accept it, be aware of it, stay present, and this too will pass.

Just thought I would let you know that I can relate to your post!

Sincerely, Norm
To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
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Re: The end of your world

Postby Sighclone » Wed Oct 29, 2008 6:31 am

The Advaita and Zen traditions are very dry. While there is the experience of Abstract Unity Consciousness which is beyond feeling (and in fact seems to intercept feeling), there is also deep engagement in activity. Neither has greater claim to your path.

I know I'm acting depressed and bland...
Are you acting? why? If there is a choice in your acting, why not choose Joy or Enthusiasm?

Namaste, Andy
A person is not a thing or a process, but an opening through which the universe manifests. - Martin Heidegger
There is not past, no future; everything flows in an eternal present. - James Joyce
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Re: The end of your world

Postby BradD » Wed Oct 29, 2008 8:36 am

Sighclone wrote:Are you acting? why? If there is a choice in your acting, why not choose Joy or Enthusiasm?


Good question, I explored this by writing my thought processes down, and I came to see that I've just always associated with the negative side of things, I'll have a thought, then my automatic response is to go to the negative rather than the positive. There will be people out there who always see the positive side of things, and are always happy about everything, for some reason, maybe due to the people I've hung around or as a result of conditioning, I just see more negative than positive. I've done that my whole life. It's the reason I consider myself to be lazy, and bad at relationships, and just negative thought after negative thought. In any given day I function just enough to be considered acceptable in society but really, there's an enormous heaviness and dread about everything I do. I look around and wonder how people can live such meaningless lives, and still be happy, I work at an outlet store, and everyone there seems content with where they are, sometimes I just want that, but the yearning for something much more is still there.

I know I'm thinking about this stuff WAY to much, but for some reason every time I say to myself "That's it! I've had it with this crap" I find myself back here, or back listening to recordings or something. I guess you could say it's an addiction of sorts, and part of me knows that...

There is a relief comes when I ask the question, Can I believe the thought in the first place? and dive into self inquiry that way. Perhaps I should explore this more.

But yeah. It's also good to know other people can see where I'm coming from as well.
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Re: The end of your world

Postby kiki » Wed Oct 29, 2008 12:45 pm

There is a relief comes when I ask the question, Can I believe the thought in the first place? and dive into self inquiry that way. Perhaps I should explore this more.

There is your answer. Anything less is an attempt to avoid confronting what you really are, a strategy of the ego.
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Re: The end of your world

Postby Sighclone » Thu Oct 30, 2008 2:49 pm

Brad -

First, some comments from the conventional world of psychology: It's tough when you have a sharp critical mind. The people around you probably had a different early script to read which was more encouraging - they started with a better self-image. Or not...just a guess. If part of your identity-ego-story is "focussed-thinking sharp guy who is also dry and cool," then you need to fully own that. And the limitations it imposes. Vulnerability is the courage to be whole. Spontaneity is a momentary expression of the infinite Joys found in the Universe. Ownership means full acceptance of everything that is you. Everything. Without judgement.

Here is something that is true: You are intelligent and sensitive.

To a master carpenter, the world looks like a big nail and he swings his hammer. But that is not always the right tool. The mind may not be the best tool for discovering the truth. It didn't work for Descartes or Sartre. Check out Byron Katie's website, thework.com and pick up a copy of "Loving What Is" by her. She has a technique, endorsed by ET, for examining beliefs formed by thoughts and habits which may be false.

Oh, by the way...no apologies are necessary for any of your questions. In my opinion, you have stumbled onto a forum which may well clear off some fog.

Namaste, Andy
A person is not a thing or a process, but an opening through which the universe manifests. - Martin Heidegger
There is not past, no future; everything flows in an eternal present. - James Joyce
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Re: The end of your world

Postby BradD » Fri Oct 31, 2008 11:49 pm

Totally sweet replies guys, thank you so much, it means a lot you'd take the time to answer my questions so thoughtfully.

Incidentally yesterday I listened to the portion of Eckharts teaching on the inner body in the PON. This really hammered home the importance of letting myself rest there. It's the perfect way to live because I let the body take care of what it needs to take care of, action rises from a different place, a place where I don't have to think about anything, a place of action without thought. On top of that there's an enormous quietness and peacefulness about just feeling whatever it is your feeling.

I love how each different teacher brings their own unique quality and perspective on life to the table.

Thanks again guys.
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Re: The end of your world

Postby Sighclone » Mon Nov 03, 2008 5:52 am

BradD -

Speaking only for myself, you are welcome. But ultimately we are all drops separated for a moment from the ocean of Being. If, as separate drops, we can remind each other of our Source, we become less separate. If you are in some way reunited with your Spirit by reading our words, or anyone's, you are hearing a song that we all wrote infinitely long ago in the present moment...

Namaste, Andy
A person is not a thing or a process, but an opening through which the universe manifests. - Martin Heidegger
There is not past, no future; everything flows in an eternal present. - James Joyce
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Re: The end of your world

Postby Jonatan » Mon Nov 10, 2008 8:42 pm

The world is an illusion
Brahman alone is real
Brahman is the world

Or, put another way:

Flee the many,
Find the One
Embrace the Many as the One

Brahman is the world. It is within this final stage of nondual realization that enlightenment comes truly alive; an overflowing impulse to infuse the world with the living light of transcendent awareness, giving sight to the blind appetites of evolution. We begin to recognize the broken and illusory world as no different than the eternal Oneness that lies at its core, watching form slide through the effortless expanse of the One—form that is itself a manifestation of the One, a fractalized reflection of emptiness. There is, in fact, no real separation between form and emptiness anywhere to be found—emptiness is form, and form is emptiness, as the Many and the One entwine themselves like frenzied lovers after an eternity of longing.

From http://www.kenwilber.com/blog/show/479


I can really relate to what you wrote BradD. The best way I can put it is like really getting IT, but only allowing it to extend inside your body, which leads to a sense of disconnection from the world. I found relaxing and allowing this sense of IT to extend outside myself to be a useful practice, so far it is rather intense though, I can see what they mean when they talk about feeling all the worlds pain at once. But with that pain there's also all the joy and colour.

In hindsight I feel as if there was just a natural avoidance of allowing it to extend further simply because it is so overwhelming, I was still coming to terms with simply letting it rest in the body. It makes total sense with what I've already concluded so many times; For real change to manifest, there must be an overwhelming sense of "I'm sick of this" first. Only then is there enough honesty for change to happen.

I found the last 3 minutes of - Disc3 - 13 To Be Enlightened Is To Be Free Of All Points Of View to be especially enlightening.
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Re: The end of your world

Postby Craig » Sun Dec 07, 2008 6:55 am

There's a new book coming out based upon this CD:

http://www.adyashanti.org/index.php?fil ... rod_id=326
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Re: The end of your world

Postby moonmissy » Tue Dec 23, 2008 11:07 am

I really like this set of CDs and talks.

I've been awakened for the first time four years ago and went through many moments of "I got it...I lost it" in the last four years.
Not many teachers talk about the journey after awakening. It can be a very confusing time for a person...the ego has many traps and snares which can hinder one's journey to integrate the knowledge of being into daily life.

Hats off to Adyashanti for pointing this out so clearly and in very mundane easy to understand terms.
Tolle pointed the starting point and the door....Adyashanti took me the rest of the way.
Before and after there exist not one
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Re: The end of your world

Postby Soul Seeker » Sun Jan 18, 2009 7:16 am

Hi BradD

I am reading Wake Up Now by Stephan Bodian.The following piece you may find of interesting :

"You seem to be experiencing what Saint John of the Cross called the "dark night of the soul," in which you've lost the comfort of your familiar worldview and your accustomed sense of self but haven't fully realized who you are. The dark night is often likened to crossing a dry and desolate expanse with no relief in sight, and the tendency is to fall into depression or despair or to question the validity of the teachings. "

When I read this I could totally relate to what Bodian was saying. I have had a great many glimpes and a good number of insights in the last 7 months and it has been enough to have changed my perception of the world, which is a complete turn around to what I thought before. I can't even understand how I thought the things I thought before. Yet I know I am not fully realized and I am in this place. There is almost no support for my state as none of my family and friends understand what I am talking about. I seem not to be able to either go forward or back. The only thing that I can do is to accept things as they are right now.
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Re: The end of your world

Postby Sighclone » Sun Jan 18, 2009 10:28 pm

That's enough. You will stabilize. Mountains will be mountains again.

Namaste, Andy
A person is not a thing or a process, but an opening through which the universe manifests. - Martin Heidegger
There is not past, no future; everything flows in an eternal present. - James Joyce
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Re: The end of your world

Postby moonmissy » Tue Feb 10, 2009 10:16 pm

Hi BradD,

The depression, just like joy, happiness, bliss ....all the same. The emptiness dancing and expressing life in the moment.
When the labeling cease and we accept even the depression or depressive state without resistant, it just is.

Like Adya say.....when you still see that there is someone there on the way to getting enlightenment, you're not there yet.
The world is just what it is...even the illusions are all expression of one.

There is no personal "I" to love another, to be depressed...to be sad....there is love, sadness....like waves on the oceans, it happens.
Before and after there exist not one
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