Attracted to men who are not interested

Talk about relationships in the context of Spiritual Enlightenment
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Amy
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Joined: Wed Jul 17, 2019 7:16 pm

Attracted to men who are not interested

Post by Amy » Wed Jul 17, 2019 7:43 pm

I'm aware of a pattern in my life where I keep being attracted to men who are not interested in me.

There is currently a man I like who clearly doesn't feel the same way. I would even like to be friends with him but he doesn't seem to want this. I accept it though it hurts. He has done nothing wrong.

I realise I have been like this since I was a teenager. There's nothing wrong with feeling attracted to someone, I guess. Its all the obsessive thoughts that accompany it that is frustrating. My practice is to acknowledge the thoughts and try to gently take the attention away from them.

I don't know if others experience something like this as well? I suppose there's an underlying belief a relationship is necessary for happiness.

As often as possible I pay attention to the background stillness which never changes. Sometimes there is peace, bliss for no reason. But this longing for a relationship keeps returning.

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Webwanderer
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Re: Attracted to men who are not interested

Post by Webwanderer » Wed Jul 17, 2019 9:56 pm

Welcome to the forum Amy.
Amy wrote:
Wed Jul 17, 2019 7:43 pm
As often as possible I pay attention to the background stillness which never changes. Sometimes there is peace, bliss for no reason.
This is good stuff that will pay long term dividends. If this relationship concern has been with you for a long time, you might explore your beliefs about your self - specifically during the times you are at peace with the background stillness. Out in nature is good for such exploring. The benefits of these moments are that we are less defensive and more will to consider possibilities. Sometimes we can uncover hidden fears and their origins that were previously unrecognized.

These are also good times to see the life that we would prefer. Of course this is a Law of Attraction technique to imagine the things in life we want in times of maximum clarity. It's kind of like our workshop for creativity. A good familiarity with that state of clear silence comes first.

WW

Amy
Posts: 3
Joined: Wed Jul 17, 2019 7:16 pm

Re: Attracted to men who are not interested

Post by Amy » Wed Jul 17, 2019 10:25 pm

Thank you very much WW.

At times there is total peace and stillness without any relationship. Everything is okay. There is contentment, space.

But there is a longing though, to be in a relationship. On the level of form I don't feel fulfilled without a partner. I don't know, maybe this longing will be fulfilled, or maybe it will simply dissolve.

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