When to know it's time to break up?

Talk about relationships in the context of Spiritual Enlightenment
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tchest77
Posts: 22
Joined: Sun Aug 25, 2019 4:10 am

When to know it's time to break up?

Post by tchest77 » Sat Sep 21, 2019 5:07 pm

We have been together for 5 years. She has very low self esteem and lacks confidence in her personal life. She has come a long way through therapy and medication helps, but her ego is very strong (she often enough whines, complains, or just sounds not that happy). I now know that her emotions are about her, so it really doesn't affect me as much, our fights are less due to this. I have been so much less reactive since I started being more present within this past month; but being around someone often, who's on and off with reactivity, does eventually not seem like this is the person I may want to be around.

We have talked about her ego, she knows why she's reactive, her upbringing has a lot to do with it. I understand this is she is where she is for now, and I know I will need to move on if she can't be less reactive.

What is an amount of time to continue, another month, 3 months, ect, before I say, I gave it time, now it's time to move on? I know only I can know this answer, but looking for a response to what amount of time one should spend, in order to realize this is the way it is for now, knowing you gave it an amount of time that was sufficient before moving on from something that is important to you.

Dcdc
Posts: 91
Joined: Tue Nov 13, 2018 3:01 pm

Re: When to know it's time to break up?

Post by Dcdc » Tue Sep 24, 2019 2:59 pm

Hello, my friend. How are you?

So, I'm very very sorry, but I don't believe anyone here can give you a good suggestion about something so personal and specific. As you said, only you will be able to balance all the issues involved and make a choice. There's no right answer to that.

What I suggest is: keep bringing yourself to the present moment as much as possible. Get used to live in the real world instead of the thinking world. This will make the reasoning and decisions easier (or, at least, less hard).

Best regards, my friend.

tchest77
Posts: 22
Joined: Sun Aug 25, 2019 4:10 am

Re: When to know it's time to break up?

Post by tchest77 » Wed Sep 25, 2019 9:53 pm

Dcdc wrote:
Tue Sep 24, 2019 2:59 pm
Hello, my friend. How are you?

So, I'm very very sorry, but I don't believe anyone here can give you a good suggestion about something so personal and specific. As you said, only you will be able to balance all the issues involved and make a choice. There's no right answer to that.

What I suggest is: keep bringing yourself to the present moment as much as possible. Get used to live in the real world instead of the thinking world. This will make the reasoning and decisions easier (or, at least, less hard).

Best regards, my friend.
Thank you for your help. What do you mean real world or thinking world?
Thanks again!

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