A discussion community revolving around Eckhart Tolle but not limited to him
far_eastofwest wrote: Don't blab out 'i don't want a committed relationship' as you can decide on these things as you go along.
far_eastofwest wrote:You have a child and had a long term relationship, that hardly makes you 'impossible' or that your attempts with guys are disaterous.
Maybe you just haven't found the right guy for you. I done dating and found i felt oppressed, bored and just had to be polite to hang around long enough. This was NOTHING to do with the guys (they were all nice) but the fact that they didn't ping with me (i wanted someone else).
You may have to just be patient, maybe get some counselling so you can talk this through with a real live person.
It sounds like you are trying to justify yourself to guys, and giving yourself an escape loophole "i just want to have fun" .
Also it sounds like you aren't confident in problem solving skills and managing conflict so the option of 'being free" is one where you can avoid having to deal with things that are either uncomfortable for you or when disagreements arise. Forward thinking too much "if i say nothing it will make things worse".
With trying different ways to relate to a man, don't, just be yourself, ie, talk about what your kid is doing, how your work is, how you feel about pollution and unemployment and the fact that bees are dying off (ie, things you're interested in) and that is that.
If you like someone, don't focus on what freedoms you might lose, just go out for a bit of dinner, talk, and let it take its own course. Don't blab out 'i don't want a committed relationship' as you can decide on these things as you go along. Eventually you will find whether this person will impinge on your freedoms you want.
Maybe you just need to go for a nice horse ride? Slow trail. It is a great starting point i think. Covers feelings of space/freedom/excitement/fun/relaxation/closeness to another creature requires empathy, consideration/communication without words/getting close to nature etc.
But i feel deep inside of my heart that i simply haven't found the right person for me, that's all. Meanwhile i prefer being free and a bit silly than being content with someone i don't like much.
far_eastofwest wrote:Sounds like you've kinda worked it out.But i feel deep inside of my heart that i simply haven't found the right person for me, that's all. Meanwhile i prefer being free and a bit silly than being content with someone i don't like much.
No doubt you will meet someone compatable when you are least expecting it.
There is a dire straights song:
"you know i like you to be free.............. where do you think you're going, i think you'd better go with me'
i like it, its about control (thats what i think other may have a different interpretation) you may like it.
Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest