nice post of you, thats what i needed, some personal experiences. Btw what kind of problems does your partner have??
I told my whole story to an expert, he said im pretty damn healthy but there is a certain degree of fear of closeness/relationship, probably from the early childhood...
Im not sick, but still the idea of sharing my/his house makes me feel depressed and i have a terrible pain in my belly and chest at the idea...with any man in the world. I dont like it. But i want to improve it.
In the last years i thought "no i dont want to commit too much, too many obligations towards his parents, i dont want to have friends in common ecc...." i have a terrible feeling in my heart, but i guess it's true that it's a bit pathological.
Btw: yes i want at least to try your "formula"...not to share everything, enjoying his company but also stay alone...it's a big challenge, but it's worth it. We will try it, i guess.