I am 26 years old and have never had a girlfriend.
I have recovered from a depression that I got 2 years ago and is now back in the game. Much thanks to ET and the teachings alike.
I had to high expectations of myself, was not myself and tried to please everyone else. I think that was the cause of the depression.
Anyhow, I now feel like I have gotten a second chanse in life and should try to make myself a good life and avoid damaging behavior.
I dont meet so many girls right now. But I am not a hopeless case, I think I just need to get to know more girls and one day a suitable girl will appear. you cant get a girlfrield sitting in your room all day right?
I am looking for a job. I feel i might have a good chanse to get to know a lot of pretty girls if i find the right kind of job.
I think that taking a high-status jobb that fits my 5-year eduation would take a lot of time and effort. I would not have so much left for the girlfriend search. I might just be tired and unhappy again...
I can also just find a job that gives me joy in what I do, maybe low-status, with focus on the acutal dooings of the job, but then maybe no girlfrieds. Or I can searth for a jobb that is both fun and with the company of some pretty girls.
I cant get the prioryties strait. What should I do?
I gues the correct answer to this in theory is: Do something that you like and enyoy for a job, get happy, and the rest (like girlfriends) will just fall in place and comes when it comes.
But I get scared of beeing single for a couple of years more.
I guess I should just find something that gives me joy and be present in that. But I dont want to do that if is involves me beeing single for another 5 years or so....
Is the girlfactor clouding my mind? Or is it ok to not take a job thats fun but with only male workers...?
Am I to controlling? Am I to calculationg? Well, we have to make some decitions and do some planning right? Out of present beeing comes "natural action" or something like that....
Daaahh, help me here....
My profile can be found on bodybuilding.com. I've been through several girls, spent my life hooking up with random women, and I've carried a ton of baggage for all my cravings. Further more, I've most recently gone through quite a scare in my life. It started out with flu symptoms, then std screening, and led to a testicular cancer check up. I could not be more open on the forums on bodybuilding.com. I must say, I cannot believe the great deal of support I received from random people. At the same time, some of my friends, family, the people closest to me seemed to be gone or not available. Through the situation, in hospitals or clinics, I am present and yet, there is an empty seat where a beautiful young girl, my gf could have sat only, I choose to take a different route in life.
As of now, I am working on unconditional self love, progressing towards expressing that love with everyone I come into contact, and maybe developing a committed relationship. I think you need to start putting yourself out there. There are tons of resources from hi5, plenty of fish, myspace, facebook, and others that are available to you if only you would put yourself out there. Sadly, many guys read "pick up" or other sorts of non-sense, attempting to think, "sex" or "love" is the answer. Eckhart points out in his books the cycle of disaster that awaits if there isn't enough presence. For me, I escape with sex, the thrills of an unknown pretty girl in bed or hooking up in a shower, public washroom, beach or God knows where? Sadly, I believe in God yet, I don't do the work of God. I pray and I ask for help but, in a selfish manner, usually when say, I get a cancer scare or I need something. I meditate and try to pray but, I get distracted in life with all sorts of form based possessions, building up myself on women, sex, clothes, cars, money, and my looks.
I imagine, if I am able to hook up with beautiful girls by putting myself out there, I could do the same thing but, in a more genuine fashion, and build some lasting relationships. All you can do is take a shot when you see a beautiful girl. No matter how good looking you are, your not going to get every girl, and you need to be okay with that. Notice in yourself, is you ego growing when you hook up or get a number or have sex? Also, notice when you don't get the girl, has your self concept been effected or destroyed? The ego will tell you so. All you can do is go out, take your shot, and let everything happen as it may.http://forum.bodybuilding.com/showthrea ... =131814353