I live with my man (I'm a woman) and work full-time. He currently has a job where he works 5 hours a week and brings in a bit of money. He uses that money to pay for his car insurance and pay off the small debts he currently has. I pay for everything else (food, gas, rent, household supplies, vacations, cable, internet, utilities, entertainment, etc.). You can probably already tell I can't seem to get past resisting how little he contributes monetarily. I feel very resentful. If I bring up him getting a better job so we can contribute more equally I think he feels attacked, or very resistant to the idea. So, conversations (and sometimes fights) about that never accomplish anything. Just writing this I feel so angry.
He spends his time currently learning graphic design because he wants to work for himself. The problem is this is one of many ideas he's had for working for himself. None have worked so far and I find it difficult to be supportive in his ventures.
We have a cycle where I'll be fine with it for a while, then we'll talk about it, nothing will be accomplished or changed, and I have no choice but to be fine with it again unless I want it to escalate to a breakup or something. I tell myself just to focus on me, and let him do what he wants. But this really bothers me and I don't know how to deal with it anymore.
I know Tolle says, "If you cannot surrender, take action immediately. Speak up or do something to bring about a change in the situation-or remove yourself from it." (TPON, softcover p. 213). I do not know what the appropriate action is. I do not want to leave him. He does provide so much for me in terms of companionship and it's not like I do all the housework or anything. He contributes in every way except for money. I don't know what action to take and I want out of this cycle.
I would really appreciate any insights or perspectives on my situation. Thank you!
