Feel like I cant be free due to knowing too much

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Feel like I cant be free due to knowing too much

Postby jtightlips21 » Sun May 21, 2017 9:51 pm

I still find myself having the same repetitive thoughts and anger about the "threatening other". The "Threatening Other" just refers to some other individual or collective(Such as a group or institution) that have incompatible values. I had some experiences with the "Threatening Other" where I felt my interests, values, and desires were attacked and suppressed. I dont know how much of it was because of the experience or a sense of Spiritual Dryness(This just means a sense of disconnection from being). On one hand, I feel like the "Threatening other" took away my ignorant innocence in making a competitive world of winners and losers real. I have noticed that I have a sense of envy of those "Simpletons" wishing I could return to that state of Childlike innocence, while hating the "Mature" world of a binary consciousness. However, I Have wondered if a state of disconnection from Being is a kind of unconsciousness of the arrogant ego that thinks just because it knows more mental content that it is more conscious than others. However, I dont know if I can ever become conscious and be freed from Binary thinking after the "threatening" side has become so concrete.
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Re: Feel like I cant be free due to knowing too much

Postby dijmart » Sun May 21, 2017 10:24 pm

When you get sick of it all, have suffered enough or just wake up out of these thinking patterns, repetitive thoughts and ruminations, then you will be ready to let it go and just live your life. My take on what you said is that you are clinging to "resisting" the threatening other, as you call it. It's this resistance pattern that is keeping the thoughts alive. So, I would ask what is the benefit you gain from doing it? Is it the feelings it offers?...anger? Remember ego is very cunning and it will cling to or push away anything, if it means it can stay alive and keep you identified with it.
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Re: Feel like I cant be free due to knowing too much

Postby jtightlips21 » Thu Jun 08, 2017 6:08 am

I guess what it comes down to is the question of whether Absolute Goodness does exist, and if it is something beyond the Ego. Because sometimes it seems like with all these different moral ideals people have, our only choices seem to be an unstable relativism where what it comes down to is that the powerful make the rules, hence a "Might make right". On the other hand, we try to figure out an absolute goodness that can be universally agreed on, and when that is not accomplished, we end up resorting to cold legalism based on some philosophical or religious system indifferent to the individuals good.
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Re: Feel like I cant be free due to knowing too much

Postby dijmart » Thu Jun 08, 2017 8:20 pm

jtightlips21 wrote:I guess what it comes down to is the question of whether Absolute Goodness does exist, and if it is something beyond the Ego. Because sometimes it seems like with all these different moral ideals people have, our only choices seem to be an unstable relativism where what it comes down to is that the powerful make the rules, hence a "Might make right". On the other hand, we try to figure out an absolute goodness that can be universally agreed on, and when that is not accomplished, we end up resorting to cold legalism based on some philosophical or religious system indifferent to the individuals good.


I will admit I'm really not sure what you're talking about?... yes, the world had good and bad, life sometimes feels unfair and unjust, but I certainly don't lose sleep over it. If your trying to right the wrongs of the world. You will give yourself an ulcer for sure or worse. There will always be good and bad in the world, that's how this game of life is set up. Furthermore, it is a set up! Every gain has a loss, every loss has a gain. Pay very close attention to your life and you will see this is true.
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Re: Feel like I cant be free due to knowing too much

Postby jtightlips21 » Fri Jun 09, 2017 9:53 pm

I guess simply what it comes down to is that I cannot stand self righteousness. But I can be just as self righteous in looking down on others for exhibiting self righteous behavior, such as being overly critical, bigoted, controlling, or authoritarian.
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Re: Feel like I cant be free due to knowing too much

Postby dijmart » Fri Jun 09, 2017 10:33 pm

jtightlips21 wrote:I guess simply what it comes down to is that I cannot stand self righteousness. But I can be just as self righteous in looking down on others for exhibiting self righteous behavior, such as being overly critical, bigoted, controlling, or authoritarian.


Good insight! Brings to mind the common self-defense mechanism of "projection". The more we dislike something within ourselves, the more we seem to "project" it onto others. Not saying this is what's happening, but it could be. Could be why it bothers you so much. We can stop doing it by bringing to light what exactly it is and self reflecting on if you do it and why, then changing the behavior. Therefore, there would no longer be anything to "project".
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Re: Feel like I cant be free due to knowing too much

Postby dijmart » Fri Jun 09, 2017 10:45 pm

Ps. If your not projecting, you could just be ultra sensitive to self righteousness behavior displaid in others, because of disliking it in yourself. Which is a little different, but I'm no expert.
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Re: Feel like I cant be free due to knowing too much

Postby jtightlips21 » Mon Nov 06, 2017 10:06 pm

I have been seeing in myself now looking at a world where I judge something as pure evil. However, I have been wondering if I am making up this threat in my head of this personality that is so loyal to rules and certain principles, that they will advocate for brutal principles and harsh condemnation on people based on the principles. Like thinking that certain Corporations with strong influence just want the workers to be subjected to toilsome labor. Or Fundamentalists worship a punitive god, and therefore think its their moral duty to make hell on earth for so called "sinners". But I dont know if I am just labeling them as such to say they share no common grounds with myself just cause I had bad experiences with them.
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Re: Feel like I cant be free due to knowing too much

Postby Webwanderer » Mon Nov 06, 2017 11:07 pm

It you live exclusively from a worldly perspective, you will have only worldly contexts with which to fashion the manor in which you perceive your life. If you strongly believe in 'pure evil' and predatory corporations, and make it a constant focus of your thoughts, your life experience will reflect that back to you. But what can you effectively do about it besides rant and complain? Are you in a position to do anything substantive about it? Is such attention bringing happiness to your life? Do you even want happiness?

You began this thread with the title "Feel like I cant be free due to knowing too much". Have you thought about knowing less about what you don't like and focusing more on what you do? What brings you joy and happiness? Politics? I doubt it. If you can't change what is, change what you think about, what you engage your attention with. Be okay that you can't change all the worlds wrongs and live the best way you can. It will save you a lot of heartache and pain. You're not here to change the world. You're here to grow in consciousness and being. Focus on what matters most. Your happiness will do more good for the world at large than all judgments and pointing to the evils you see could ever do.

WW
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