How to feel good about yourself?

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starting
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How to feel good about yourself?

Post by starting » Sat Oct 19, 2013 1:04 am

I am trying to find some answers to my life. I am facing some emotional difficulties and it ache in places I didn't know I had inside me.
I am reading Eckhart for some months and sometimes I listen to some audios at night, before I fall asleep and I feel better.

My problem is that I am not able to go out of my home anymore, when I am at home I feel better. When I am in other places (in the street, with friends, with my family, or in any other place) I feel the negativity in me, it is difficult to walk, not due to any kind of physical pain, but emotional pain. I feel like I need someone to push me.
I cannot listen to the radio or TV, the sound has bothered me, also when people start talking to me, sometimes a lot of futilities.

I would like to ask you if you experienced some feelings like that, and what have you done to feel good again.

People I know don't talk about Eckhart teachings so I am very pleased to find the forum.
Thank you

azooo
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Re: How to feel good about yourself?

Post by azooo » Sat Oct 19, 2013 2:36 pm

Hello!
starting wrote: My problem is that I am not able to go out of my home anymore, when I am at home I feel better. When I am in other places (in the street, with friends, with my family, or in any other place) I feel the negativity in me, it is difficult to walk, not due to any kind of physical pain, but emotional pain.
We are strongly conditioned to believe that we should always be cheerful, happy, hang out with people, be in a good mood, not be lonely not isolate ourselves etc...

Yet at the moment you don't feel like that. And that is perfectly OK. Respect the fact that your inner being currently feels these emotions including the pain (which I know can be unpleasant). Allow everything to fully express itself even as the need to be isolated and to feel the pain. Don't ask the mind for advices on how to get rid of this pain - the only solution the mind can suggest is in the form of avoidance and suppression. Rather be here with this.
I feel like I need someone to push me.
What do you mean by that?
I cannot listen to the radio or TV, the sound has bothered me, also when people start talking to me, sometimes a lot of futilities.
I would like to ask you if you experienced some feelings like that, and what have you done to feel good again.
I can relate to you very well. The only thing worth saying from this is that everything comes and goes and so will this. Just don't fall in the trap of thinking you have a problem and need to find a solution. Rather, try to see this as mind movement as well. Also try to notice if its trying to sell the idea that you cannot be at peace and happy until you get rid of this..

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Re: How to feel good about yourself?

Post by Webwanderer » Sat Oct 19, 2013 4:00 pm

azooo wrote:The only thing worth saying from this is that everything comes and goes and so will this. Just don't fall in the trap of thinking you have a problem and need to find a solution. Rather, try to see this as mind movement as well. Also try to notice if its trying to sell the idea that you cannot be at peace and happy until you get rid of this..
This is sage advice from azooo. So long as you believe there is a problem there will appear to be one. Give yourself the space to experience whatever arises in your life without identifying with it. Your "I am's" are the lead identifiers to the pain that you feel.
starting wrote: I am trying...
I am facing some emotional difficulties...
My problem is that I am not able to go out of my home anymore...
When I am in other places (in the street, with friends, with my family, or in any other place) I feel the negativity in me...
I cannot listen to the radio or TV...
Consider this list of self created identifiers and belief perspectives. Then consider that you can also choose to let them go. I realize that you cannot simply let go of the feelings. They are part of your current experience and have value if you see them as such. But you can let go of the identification with such belief statements and perceived truisms. They are only as true in the experience as you create it in your belief.

"I am" has power. Use it wisely. It creates identification with thoughts which leads to experience reflected in that identification. Remember the story of Moses on the mount when he asked the name of God. "I Am that I Am". What greater pointer to the power of I am? Whatever one claims and believes as an identity through "I am" sets in motion the experience of that claim. No claim to I am at all offers freedom from all identifiers.

I would like to ask you if you experienced some feelings like that, and what have you done to feel good again.
We all have some version of painful experiences that we have had to deal with. It's just part of life in the human experience.

Honor your feelings/experiences but do not make them an identity. They do not deserve the "I am" status of who you are. View them as self created experiences just passing through. Passing through what? This is a key consideration and I recommend consistent explorations in feeling this out. What are you when all the identifiers are seen through and set aside? Do you disappear? Or do you just become clearer with each release? And what is it that becomes clearer? Explore this with genuineness and consistency and the pain that concerns you will lose it's power to distract you.

You are eternal - at least that part that is aware of all the subtle 'I am' identifications that you create and experience. Feel out this essence of your being. It's clarity will return your life experience to one of joyful curiosity and exploration as the painful belief created identities are let go to pass into irrelevance.


Then there is this:
I am very pleased to find the forum.
A good use of 'I am'. Not just finding the forum, but more importantly the experience of 'pleased'. Find more and more and more things and experiences to be pleased about. The more pleased and appreciative in life you are the less time energy you have to be creating painful applications of 'I am'.

WW

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starting
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Re: How to feel good about yourself?

Post by starting » Sat Oct 19, 2013 10:52 pm

starting wrote:I feel like I need someone to push me.
azooo wrote: What do you mean by that?
Thank you for your response and your question, Azooo
I mean when I have or even if I want to do something, I need someone to “push me” or I am not able to do this thing. Maybe it is a kind of fear, I don’t know. I think am afraid of what I judge the best for me…
For example, If I decide to go to some place or to do something different, in the first moment it makes me feel happy, I want to do something and I start to find the possibilities, etc…then this energy starts to move, to fade away and I end up not doing what I had planned. Maybe because I’m afraid to fail again.
Webwanderer wrote:So long as you believe there is a problem there will appear to be one. Give yourself the space to experience whatever arises in your life without identifying with it. Your "I am's" are the lead identifiers to the pain that you feel.
WW, thank you for your words

You are right, I am constantly identifying myself with these feelings.

But more than this identification, sometimes, when I accept my feelings and let it be as it is, I feel that I am not doing the correct thing.

Since I started with these uncomfortable feelings I am more comfortable with the silence. Even when I am enjoying some situation sometimes I don’t feel like I need to say something…the more I am present and enjoying the moment, the more is the silence in me. I like to feel what is happening and words sometimes could change it…
But unfortunately people think the opposite… They think that I am not interested in the moment, or that I am not an interesting person and I feel bad afterwards...
“Your life is in transition from a caterpillar to a butterfly. Something may be saying: `Where is my leaf?’ Don't fear. Trust. All is well. How auspicious that Grace has picked you up like this. Hold this gratitude inside your heart” ~ Mooji

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