can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

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Attention
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can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by Attention » Wed Apr 30, 2014 12:49 pm

is there any way to get mr. eckhart to talk about how to deal with social anxiety (and by that i don't mean shyness), it's so complicated condition, it needs specific advice!

peas
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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by peas » Wed Apr 30, 2014 2:50 pm

I'll be chatting with him soon ;-)

Can you describe the anxiety for us?

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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by Attention » Thu May 01, 2014 2:06 pm

thank you very much :)

https://socialanxietyinstitute.org/livi ... al-anxiety

maybe this article is the best in describing how social anxiety feels like. it written by dr. tomas richard, he claims that he had suffered from social anxiety disorder for 20 years.

Phil2
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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by Phil2 » Thu May 01, 2014 3:24 pm

Attention wrote:thank you very much :)

https://socialanxietyinstitute.org/livi ... al-anxiety

maybe this article is the best in describing how social anxiety feels like. it written by dr. tomas richard, he claims that he had suffered from social anxiety disorder for 20 years.
Thanks for this interesting link.

Well I would say that 'social anxiety' is common to all persons at one level or another ... who is not afraid to speak (or sing) in front of a public ? We fear the look of others, their opinion about us, especially those near to us ...

And this reminds me a scene from the movie "Apocalypse Now" when Colonel Kurtz (played by Marlon Brando) says:

" Have you ever considered any real freedoms ? Freedoms from the opinion of others... even the opinions of yourself ? "

Maybe Colonel Kurtz was not so crazy after all :-)

And this is also one of the great teachings of Eckhart Tolle: you are NOT what others think of you ... you are not even what you think of yourself ... you are not thought at all ... what you are is beyond thought, beyond ALL forms, psychological or physical forms ... you are the formless ...
"What irritates us about others is an opportunity to learn on ourselves"
(Carl Jung)

Phil2
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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by Phil2 » Thu May 01, 2014 3:40 pm

... and also we come here to a very interesting point, and it is this:

Spiritual teachings, like those of Eckhart Tolle (but also others), can really heal you from all kinds of mental (psychological) disorders.

Because when you really understand the core of spirituality, you know with certainty that there can be NOTHING WRONG with you fundamentally ...

So a really 'spiritual' person can never be depressive any more ...

Do you realize how huge this statement is ?

Freud was really inspired when he coined the concept of "talking cure" (well in fact it was coined by one of his female patients) which later became "psycho-analysis" ... you can be healed by words, of course you need the right words (and I don't even say that Freud had those 'right' words, but rather that he did not as he was himself conditioned by his time and scientific materialism, certainly his former disciple Carl Jung was nearer to spirituality, main reason why they had to part in fact)

:-)
"What irritates us about others is an opportunity to learn on ourselves"
(Carl Jung)

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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by gavra » Thu May 01, 2014 7:32 pm

I would also like to hear his thoughts on social anxiety if there is actually anything to add beside all that is already written.

Attention
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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by Attention » Sat May 03, 2014 8:34 pm

Phil2 wrote: Thanks for this interesting link.

Well I would say that 'social anxiety' is common to all persons at one level or another ... who is not afraid to speak (or sing) in front of a public ? We fear the look of others, their opinion about us, especially those near to us ...
thanks for the quotes :)

i understand that normal people may get worry about some social situations, but social anxiety disorder is something different, here's another interesting quote by dr. richard:
PARENTS and FRIENDS of people with social anxiety: Your loved one has a much deeper fear and anxiety than you understand. You may be nervous about talking to other people, but people with social anxiety have very deep and emotionally devastating feelings about doing things like this that you consider easy. When a person with social anxiety says they're anxious -- they mean they are stuck in a vicious negative cycle of belief and emotions that can only be described as a high amount of continuous fear. It is much much worse than you can imagine.

gavra
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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by gavra » Sun May 04, 2014 12:00 pm

I found this on youtube, it might be helpful https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AO3wRY9lWSk

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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by Attention » Mon May 26, 2014 9:42 am

gavra wrote:I found this on youtube, it might be helpful https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AO3wRY9lWSk
Yes, i've already watch it and found it helpful. but the thoughts, feelings and behaviors of Social Anxiety are hard to observe, so i hope to see something more specific.

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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by Attention » Mon May 26, 2014 9:45 am

peas wrote:I'll be chatting with him soon ;-)

Can you describe the anxiety for us?
any news sir?

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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by ashley72 » Mon May 26, 2014 1:33 pm

If you want specific advice I'd recommend this website => http://www.anxietycoach.com/socialanxietydisorder.html

I've suffered from panic disorder with agoraphobia which is a very cute form of social anxiety. I've recovered to the point now that I'm mildly anxious just before a social exposure and during the initial few minutes of a social get to together, but those nerves usually blow off now. For a long time I just didn't socialize with friends I'd spent years hanging out with.

I used to fight the nerves and do all types of avoidance and safety behaviors... Those tactics just don't work but prolong the nervous condition.

I'm not sure how old you are, but I'm in my forties now. I didn't suffer from the disorder until I was about 35... It was a very sudden onset about 1 week. But because it was so acute and I had so much ongoing work stress in my life and other stuff it took me a few years to find my feet again.

But with the right exposure treatment you could probably make good progress in weeks if not months.

What sort of issues are you facing? If you can explain some of your situation anxiety I might be able to give you tips.

But you need to do essential things like getting your body language right. You have to look people in the eyes when you talking with them and commit to what's happening and not sink off into the background or shadows.

If necessary it may require you to fake it before you make it :lol: .... Which is role playing... But we all do that in our different roles.

If you've had socially awkward experiences in the past, you just have to let that old image go.. It was the old you... A fresh attitude is needed. The new you is walking out that door and feeling more confident. Get some new socializing clothes, to help you let go of the past.

Basically people with social anxiety treat social situations as dangerous and that gets them feeling socially awkward when they first arrive. They might say something stupid and people might laugh or make fun. If you take it to heart you may find yourself heading for the shadows.... but that's not the answer. You just have to blow it off, and keep focusing on engaging with people, don't give in to the situation, don't let the negative judgments dictating the event. People generally want your attention.... so for a socially awkward person your best strategy would be just pair up with some also looking a little lost, and ask them where their from, just normal stuff... Maybe tell them something funny that happen recently... Nothing too serious. The less you struggle and try and force something to happen the more you will relax and the early nerves will just subside.

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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by peas » Wed Jun 18, 2014 9:35 am

Social Anxiety is not special. It is just an intense fear of the unknown. And if we follow fear to its end we find it cannot exist without time - hence the power of now. So, Eckhart says be present. There you find all the answers, including answers about fear.

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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by ashley72 » Wed Jun 18, 2014 4:15 pm

peas wrote:Social Anxiety is not special. It is just an intense fear of the unknown. And if we follow fear to its end we find it cannot exist without time - hence the power of now. So, Eckhart says be present. There you find all the answers, including answers about fear.
Fear arises because we perceive something as dangerous.

If you think staying present somehow bypasses your nervous system... you really are brainwashed.

We have a nervous system that is suppose to react to its environment. If there is something threatening to your survival... your nervous system responds in a way that hopefully allows you to escape or handle that perceived threat.

If you want to do yourself and others a favor, go read something about the treatment of social anxiety from someone who actually understands the disorder... rather then preaching on this forum about a disorder you clearly have little understanding about.

http://www.anxietycoach.com/socialanxietydisorder.html

Being "present" isn't some magic bullet for treating anxiety disorders. They require exposure therapy, coupled with cognitive behavior therapy etc.

peas
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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by peas » Wed Jun 18, 2014 4:37 pm

ashley72 wrote:
peas wrote:Social Anxiety is not special. It is just an intense fear of the unknown. And if we follow fear to its end we find it cannot exist without time - hence the power of now. So, Eckhart says be present. There you find all the answers, including answers about fear.
Fear arises because we perceive something as dangerous.

If you think staying present somehow bypasses your nervous system... you really are brainwashed.

We have a nervous system that is suppose to react to its environment. If there is something threatening to your survival... your nervous system responds in a way that hopefully allows you to escape or handle that perceived threat.

If you want to do yourself and others a favor, go read something about the treatment of social anxiety from someone who actually understands the disorder... rather then preaching on this forum about a disorder you clearly have little understanding about.

http://www.anxietycoach.com/socialanxietydisorder.html

Being "present" isn't some magic bullet for treating anxiety disorders. They require exposure therapy, coupled with cognitive behavior therapy etc.
I see you are still trolling the Eckhart Tolle forums with anti-Tolle comments Ashley.

Being present is a magic bullet, unless you can't see it through the end, which is why I suspect you are still trolling.

It's ok to admit that you don't find presence easy. That is part of the surrender that is part of presence. Its also part of the awareness that is part of presence. Awareness of your conditioned mind.

Some people seek help in this area. If you need help Ashley just ask. I am happy to provide private pointers for you. Just PM me.

There are no real, long term answers for people who experience any form of anxiety or depression in medical treatment, just temporary relief through drugs or therapy. Most psychological studies find a very large relapse rate.

The real solution lies in questioning the whole thought structure that now rule people. Questioning the "me" that our thoughts refer to when fearing something.

The very essence of the ego is at the core of anxiety and depression. It is a bondage that does not need to exist.

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Re: can you get eckhart tolle to talk about social anxiety?

Post by Webwanderer » Wed Jun 18, 2014 5:08 pm

peas wrote:The very essence of the ego is at the core of anxiety and depression. It is a bondage that does not need to exist.
Are you saying the ego does not need to exist, or are you referring to the anxiety and depression as not needing to exist? Or is it both?

WW

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