Intensifying Pain Body

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Intensifying Pain Body

Postby Merlin82 » Sun May 03, 2015 2:40 am

Hello,

Is it common for the pain body to strengthen for a while when you start to be more consciously aware of it?

I realise I have a fairly dense pain body (long term anxiety) and have spent most of my life attempting to avoid it (addictions etc).

I have read Eckhart's books many times over the years but tend to get overwhelmed when i start trying to be aware and practice acceptance of strong emotions. There is a lot of resistance in me and when I practice conscious awareness of strong and difficult feelings. I find they intensify and I tend to get washed away with them rather than finding that elusive spaciousness. I have major anxiety over the permanence of such negative emotions and tend to feel that I'm adding fuel to the fire by giving them awareness. I am even struggling to find acceptance of the resistance in me!

If anyone has any pointers I would be very grateful

Thankyou
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Re: Intensifying Pain Body

Postby Manyana » Sun May 03, 2015 3:34 am

Hi Merlin,

I found this link very helpful. I also like the connection between the woman and Eckhart.

"innerbody awareness and the transformation of the painbody" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOoXFense4Q
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Re: Intensifying Pain Body

Postby EnterZenFromThere » Sun May 03, 2015 12:47 pm

Hi merlin,

Since becoming more aware of thoughtless states and my inner self I have certainly gone through periods of great difficulty where the aspects of myself I had tried to hide in the dark reaches of my being came forward for consideration in the light of my awareness.

From the little I know of the experiences of others it seems this is very common in people whose awareness is increasing. Personally I see it as a good sign. It means we are facing the more tangled parts of us and working towards loosening the knots that prevent a more clear awareness shining through us.

In my experience, these periods of facing our inner darkness/unknowing/unconsciousness are the greatest trials any individual can face. It can be extremely challenging to face your own innermost fears. I have found these periods are easiest when I treat my fears as though they were a naughty child crying out for attention. I find a balance between catering to them, and ignoring them. This balance is found when I acknowledge the fear is there by allowing it to express itself within my awareness - observing the reactions this fear has on the rest of my being, and allowing it all to take place as I remain still and silent. Through this way, I feel the fear unfurl and an ease replace the tension that had been.

Remaining still and silent while acknowledging the presence of my deepest fears is a challenge I doubt will ever end. I do not see this as a bad thing. My relationship with fear is evolving to the extent that I am far less afraid of fear. I don't see it as a great burden like I once did. Surprisingly, it now seems more like a gift. This shift in my relationship with fear is synonymous with an increase in my awareness and a life of ever greater ease. Living through this shift has been incredibly challenging - requiring patience, courage and acceptance.

If you can deeply realise the gift that are the lessons of your anxiety you will massively transform your life. Every second of pain has been worth how I feel now.
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Re: Intensifying Pain Body

Postby Merlin82 » Mon May 04, 2015 2:57 am

Manyana wrote:Hi Merlin,

I found this link very helpful. I also like the connection between the woman and Eckhart.

"innerbody awareness and the transformation of the painbody" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOoXFense4Q


Thankyou for this link. Wow, the woman's story and Eckhart's discussion really resonated with me. Very helpful. Thankyou!
Merlin82
 
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Re: Intensifying Pain Body

Postby Merlin82 » Mon May 04, 2015 3:04 am

EnterZenFromThere wrote:Hi merlin,

Since becoming more aware of thoughtless states and my inner self I have certainly gone through periods of great difficulty where the aspects of myself I had tried to hide in the dark reaches of my being came forward for consideration in the light of my awareness.

From the little I know of the experiences of others it seems this is very common in people whose awareness is increasing. Personally I see it as a good sign. It means we are facing the more tangled parts of us and working towards loosening the knots that prevent a more clear awareness shining through us.

In my experience, these periods of facing our inner darkness/unknowing/unconsciousness are the greatest trials any individual can face. It can be extremely challenging to face your own innermost fears. I have found these periods are easiest when I treat my fears as though they were a naughty child crying out for attention. I find a balance between catering to them, and ignoring them. This balance is found when I acknowledge the fear is there by allowing it to express itself within my awareness - observing the reactions this fear has on the rest of my being, and allowing it all to take place as I remain still and silent. Through this way, I feel the fear unfurl and an ease replace the tension that had been.

Remaining still and silent while acknowledging the presence of my deepest fears is a challenge I doubt will ever end. I do not see this as a bad thing. My relationship with fear is evolving to the extent that I am far less afraid of fear. I don't see it as a great burden like I once did. Surprisingly, it now seems more like a gift. This shift in my relationship with fear is synonymous with an increase in my awareness and a life of ever greater ease. Living through this shift has been incredibly challenging - requiring patience, courage and acceptance.

If you can deeply realise the gift that are the lessons of your anxiety you will massively transform your life. Every second of pain has been worth how I feel now.


Thankyou for your thoughtful reply. I agree - I think it is a good sign - I like to think of it as cleaning a really dirty pot - the dishwater is going to get pretty dirty before the pot's clean! I think when I have been attempting to shine the light of consciousness on any suffering in the past there has been a general lack of compassion. Like you describe, treating it a a naughty child - it generally does not help to get upset at a naughty child - often there just is a case of misunderstanding and compassion can go a long way :)
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