Obsessive thoughts ^.^

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Obsessive thoughts ^.^

Postby Oceanborn » Sat Jul 30, 2016 8:43 pm

Hi everyone. I was wondering if anyone can relate to this. For a several months I started to have really disturbing thought. Thoughts are trying to convince me that I am sexually attracted to my sister, or someone else and I would hurt them if I lose control. Plain stupid, I know. I also sometimes have a feeling that I have no innocence at all. Like darkness is consuming me. All these happens when I lose it and forget about spiritual understanding. I know I am just an observer but sometimes I cannot help it. Can anyone relate??
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Re: Obsessive thoughts ^.^

Postby ashley72 » Sun Jul 31, 2016 10:15 am

An intrusive thought is an unwelcome involuntary thought, image, or unpleasant idea that may become an obsession, is upsetting or distressing, and can feel difficult to manage or eliminate.


https://www.intrusivethoughts.org

You're describing obsessive compulsive disorder OCD related to intrusive thoughts. It's a kind of anxiety disorder, I've suffered from the condition myself from time to time. I would say everybody probably gets unwanted thoughts, however, a person suffering from nervous illness or OCD tends to get more fearful of these intrusive thoughts, as a result if these intrusive thoughts are a symptom of nervousness you tend to get more of the intrusive thoughts the more you keep fearing the thoughts themselves. It's a positive feedback loop when the output "intrusive thoughts" get treating as dangerous which in turn feeds back into the input cycle creating more fear and hence more intrusive thoughts!

The treatment is stop fearing these intrusive thoughts, you're not going to follow through with the thought, it's an anxiety trick, and your simply scaring the shit out of yourself which only makes the intrusive thoughts more frightening!

Go see a good therapist. They should be able to help you with Cognitive behavior therapy coupled with exposure treatment to help you stop scaring the shit out of yourself.

Don't fuel the panic and fear by believing you're somehow a bad person or evil or crazy, because you're having some intrusive thoughts... your normal and healthy and just need some help understanding what's happening.

These days when I get the odd intrusive thought, which usually has a sexual or dangerous element to it, I just see it as a product of my nervous illness, I don't avoid the intrusive thought or scare myself further, because I know it's "only" an intrusive thought, with no real power beyond that! As a result the intrusive thoughts just stops bothering me after a short while and that is that.

A few pointers

1. Reframe the intrusive thought as a symptom of nervous illness
2. When they next appear, don't feed on them by thinking you're an evil, bad or sick person... because that just fuels their influence and scares the shit out of you.
3. Don't use any type of avoidance or distraction methods.... or fuel panic in yourself by worrying others will find out your dirty evil secret...because again that just fuels their influence of fear.
4. Don't believe by being more religious or good person will somehow make them disappear because it won't. They will always occur from time to time, it's just how you view them as being benign and harmless that diminishes their influence over time and stops a positive feedback loop developing.
5. If your successful in removing all the fear-mongering around your intrusive thoughts I guarantee they will lose all their power and you certainly won't be bothered by them anymore.
6. Challenge the offshoot intrusive thoughts which seem to fuel the fear, like "what if I carried this out?", "what if someone finds out that I'm having these evil & sick thoughts?", "maybe I really am evil?" All these whatifs are fueling the fear and making the intrusive thought much more powerful, because of a simple communication process called "positive feedback loop" causes a feeling of panic & loss of control around the intrusive thoughts.
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Re: Obsessive thoughts ^.^

Postby Oceanborn » Sun Jul 31, 2016 10:53 am

Thank you for replying. If I could convince myself that these are just random thoughts it would be easy. But it seems I have convinced myself it goes deeper than that. For example at first I was just having sexual or harmful thoughts about my sister ( I am a girl, btw) then I started to feel some 'thickling' in my genitals. That made me fear that if I am really attracted to her and I thought like what if I experince an orgasm by looking at her? That would be so shameful and I would not live with that. I know all these are illusions of my mind. I just wanted to share it here to see if anyone understands.
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Re: Obsessive thoughts ^.^

Postby Admiral Akmir » Sun Aug 07, 2016 9:54 pm

Oceanborn wrote:Thank you for replying. If I could convince myself that these are just random thoughts it would be easy. But it seems I have convinced myself it goes deeper than that. For example at first I was just having sexual or harmful thoughts about my sister ( I am a girl, btw) then I started to feel some 'thickling' in my genitals. That made me fear that if I am really attracted to her and I thought like what if I experince an orgasm by looking at her? That would be so shameful and I would not live with that. I know all these are illusions of my mind. I just wanted to share it here to see if anyone understands.


I too have struggled with not being able to see the clear boundary of where my true desires and wants in life end, and where intrusive thoughts begin. Sometimes things just pop into my head, and I don't feel guilty. The guilt comes from NOT feeling guilty, or disturbed. At least if I feel bad about it, then it seems like I can categorize it as "intrusive", but the really scary ones, are the thoughts of doing terrible things, without any sort of guilt or shame that follows. Do I really want to do those things? Am I a monster? Why do I feel excited at the thought of hurting people? It's confusing and distressing to say the least.

I think the worst part about it is that the origin cannot be identified in most cases. If I can identify what makes me feel a certain way, then the truth of that thing is exposed, and it loses its power. But where do these thoughts come from? The teachings might say that it's not really who we are, but when the origin of it is completely absent, it's tough to really say that with any confidence. Sometimes I go on walks, and I think about the things that I think, or the ways that I act, and I try to figure out why. Sometimes I can have a powerful revelation, but with the intrusive thoughts, where do I even begin? I have to admit, ET's book got me thinking, but in the past several years I have largely abandoned his teachings, and see them more as a signpost that points in a vague direction, rather than principles that I must try to apply in my life. I subscribe to the idea that what makes up our personalities is mostly a consequence of our environment growing up, but what about mental illness? If there is truly something wrong in the brain, how can we say that it is not who we really are? I've had a really hard time with this one for a long time.

I've also been discovering over the last year or two, the balance between spiritual theory, and practical application. My long, thinking walks would be spiritual theory, where I form ideas and come to understand the truth of the things in my life. The practical application is more along the lines of the things that Ashley72 has talked about. I will certainly go to the site that she posted, and I would also recommend 7 cups of tea, they have a self help section there that deals with a lot of things. Recently I found the section on "boundaries" very insightful. It helped me realize that I can take back control in my life, and choose what I will and will not allow. It's powerful stuff. Both are equally important.
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Re: Obsessive thoughts ^.^

Postby ashley72 » Tue Aug 09, 2016 8:19 am

When you're in a directed thinking mode, you can think your next thought using feedback loops. This is true when we're working on solving a problem or discussing something with others which requires our focus. I can think about mathematics and promote new thoughts pertaining to multiplication, division, subtraction & addition etc.

But most of the time our thoughts arise unconsciously, bubble up from the void because of external triggers which we have no control over. We may not have any particularly focus and a external stimulus may trigger an undesirable or intrusive thought cycle, which in turn may lead to a cycle of positive feedback, the output (the perception this intrusive thought is dangerous and frightening) feeds directly back into into the input signal more anxious intrusive type thought arise causing in turmoil.

It really doesn't matter why we have a particular thought, thoughts are just perspectives and can be good or bad. The point is not to feed a positive feedback loop by trying to avoid or fight against thoughts, because you will only lose the battle!

I've made a lot of progress myself with intrusive thought management by accepting them as symptomatic thoughts which arise because of a generalised nervousness illness. Whether this illness has biological roots no one really knows for sure... But you can manage it better by not creating a positive feedback loop.
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Re: Obsessive thoughts ^.^

Postby ashley72 » Sat Aug 13, 2016 12:14 am

a really informative article on "obsessive thoughts" very relevant to this thread - http://lifecounselinginstitute.com/horrific-thoughts-a-common-form-of-ocd/
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