Need some advice help on freeing my mind

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Need some advice help on freeing my mind

Postby Mludes99 » Sun Aug 07, 2016 6:44 pm

[list=][/list] so after having read and re-read parts of the power of now i'm actually in a worse place than before i read it. I have created this problem where i can become de-identified with the mind for a few days at a time, life is fun, light and my confidence is peak and i'm witty and can easily connect with people. However i then slip back into mind indentification for 3 or 4 days and get into terrible thought patterns causing low moods and anxiety around close friends and family which is terrible because it's completely contrasts my confident fun loud personality when i'm free of mind. I start to feel anxious about meeting up with my best mate because i feel like i won't be my true self because i'm so in my head overthinking everything. I try watching my thoughts and the emotions but that can make me feel even more out of it and hopeless. Then i'll actually remember one ness with being and on word like listen to your thoughts or something will point me back to indentification with being. However it never stays and is starting to ruin my life. please help :(
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Re: Need some advice help on freeing my mind

Postby Webwanderer » Sun Aug 07, 2016 8:07 pm

When you watch your thoughts and emotions, what are you looking for? Or what is your purpose in doing so?

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Re: Need some advice help on freeing my mind

Postby Mludes99 » Sun Aug 07, 2016 8:52 pm

They're difficult thoughts usually repeating quotes in the book like 'listen to your thoughts' or 'Observe your thoughts' usually accompanied by feeling uneasyness or fear of being in the mind identified
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Re: Need some advice help on freeing my mind

Postby Mludes99 » Sun Aug 07, 2016 8:54 pm

I usuallt have the purpose of trying to become dis identified with the mind and feel that joy/lightness of being
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Re: Need some advice help on freeing my mind

Postby Webwanderer » Sun Aug 07, 2016 9:15 pm

Mludes99 wrote:I usuallt have the purpose of trying to become dis identified with the mind and feel that joy/lightness of being

And how do you think watching thoughts and emotions might help achieve that? (The point of this it that you already know the answers you seek. Maybe I can help you connect with them within you.)

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Re: Need some advice help on freeing my mind

Postby Mludes99 » Sun Aug 07, 2016 10:01 pm

I think i'm confused about the whole thing. Sometimes i will not be thinking/present but not feel good like that lightness and joy of being that i know and recognise as being present. So i get confused and very stifled i'd be greatful if you could just explain what to do when you aren't thinking but aren't feeling good and if that is actually being present to the moment? I think i'm just a bit confused
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Re: Need some advice help on freeing my mind

Postby Admiral Akmir » Sun Aug 07, 2016 10:29 pm

The desire to change is usually self defeating in my experience. I went through a period of time where I read the power of now, and tried to apply it. The short version of that story is that it just didn't work, and the whole concept of it just sort of faded away. These days I find myself going on long walks, and thinking about things. I try to identify the truth of the things around me, and sometimes I have a revelation, and see things a little bit differently by the time I get home. I don't care about awakening or changing anymore.

Most people just go through life, viewing everything through a heavily tinted lense. The coloring of that lens was not their choice, they view a distorted version of reality, and will likely never know it. How wonderful is it, that you have found ET's book, and are beginning to walk down your own personal path of finding the truth?

Here's something to think about; what if you experienced strange noises and sights in your house, and felt horrified that there was a ghost haunting you? What if you found out at a later time, that it was a natural phenomenon? A series of earthquakes, or a specific way the wind is shaped as it comes to your property? The fear and uncertainty would go away as you recognized the truth of the situation. Our ancient ancestors used to think that thunderstorms were the wrath of angry gods, punishing them. Imagine the shock they would feel if we were to bring them here into our times and show them the science and truth. Their beliefs would be shaken to say the least. Do you think that there are any parallels to these stories in your own life? Rather than focus on changing, and becoming this new, improved version of yourself, why not strive to see the world as it really is? Why not make it your goal to see the tinted lens that you view the world through? When you see things for what they really are, you gain a new perspective, and your life begins to transform.
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Re: Need some advice help on freeing my mind

Postby Webwanderer » Mon Aug 08, 2016 1:40 am

Mludes99 wrote:I think i'm confused about the whole thing. Sometimes i will not be thinking/present but not feel good like that lightness and joy of being that i know and recognise as being present. So i get confused and very stifled i'd be greatful if you could just explain what to do when you aren't thinking but aren't feeling good and if that is actually being present to the moment? I think i'm just a bit confused

To start with, don't make a litmus test out of it. If you are constantly looking for results, you are setting yourself up for a success/failure scenario. If you find yourself feeling bad, you then feel bad for failing an unnecessary test that you imposed on yourself. That's not the path to the joy and happiness that is awaiting you with a more inclusive approach to life.

The idea of watching thought has the primary purpose of recognizing that you are not that thought. You are the consciousness within which all thought to takes place. Thought leads to belief, and thought is born out of existing beliefs. Watching thought, and emotions, is simply an exercise that helps you recognize the distinction between thought identification and your fundamental essence of being. Watching thought helps you reconnect with your true nature.

Once it is clear that you are not what you think you are, you can begin to live from a larger frame of reference. Don't get hung up on watching thought as if it's some end all state of being. It's not. It's just that we have entrained ourself to believe we are what ever comes after the statement "I am...." In reality we are just the I Am. Whatever might come after is just imagination masquerading as reality. "I am a man, woman, doctor, mother, etc. etc. etc. Get a feel for this perspective.

Let's talk about feelings and emotions. To start with, you feel emotions. But that's not all feelings do. Emotions are our greatest gift in this human experience. Start to see them as a gift and it will open up a whole life of joy and happiness. Here's how it works. Emotions are primary indicators of the nature of our alignment from our human perspective - with spirit, our true nature, and our greater beingness. The happier, the more peaceful, the more loving, the more appreciative we are, the more in alignment we are. The more depressed, the angrier, the more frustrated, the more fearful we are, the more out of alignment we are.

Of critical importance here, is that there is nothing wrong with being out of alignment. Remember this. It will save you a lot of unnecessary pain. It's just one type of experience available in this physical state. Once you recognize the distinction between thought and being, you can make great use of the gift of emotions. Emotions are guidance tools. When we are in emotional pain, that pain is telling us that the way we are thinking, the way we are perceiving conditions and events, is not the way our greater beingness is perceiving those conditions and events.

Again there is nothing wrong with this from the greater perspective. Of coarse from our human perspective we can, and often do, make all kinds of right and wrong judgments, but that's the very limited point of view that we are trying to get beyond. It's this right and wrong point of view that creates our pain to start with. Our path to joy and happiness lies in our thinking and perceiving in ways closer to the view of our greater nature, or living more in alignment. Emotions are our primary tools telling us how we're doing.

This is not so much an analytical process. It's a feeling one. Discern what your feelings are telling you. Make a life long process of it. Feel your way to truth and clarity. Go out and have some fun and see if that feels better than fretting over watching thoughts. You can still be aware of thoughts, but from a context that is much more enjoyable.

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Re: Need some advice help on freeing my mind

Postby ashley72 » Sat Aug 13, 2016 12:52 am

I'm guessing you already had a pre-existing anxiety disorder, which is why most people pick up a book like PON in the first place. But even if you didn't its quite possible that Tolle's teachings could create a fertile ground for anxiety to grow & flourish because of the introspection around the self image (ego tendencies).

Your own problems with Eckhart Tolle's teachings are fairly common unfortunately. I ran into issues myself after reading PON and following Tolle's pointers/teachings for a while.

Tolle's main audience for his books are people seeking self-help with anxiety, OCD, shyness, etc...all mental illness in the nervous category.

Whilst Tolle's book is a great resource for better understanding our ego-tendencies it doesn't tackle nervous illness in a beneficial way to the nervous sufferer. Tolle's books promote introspection, which can promote anxiety if you don't fully understand the root cause of nervous illness!

I overcame issues with anxiety and nervousness by understanding that the nervous sufferer starts to deploy avoidance strategies as a coping mechanism which actually makes the illness much worse in the long run. You start holding objects like water bottles when your out with your friends, because you believe somehow its helping you get through the nervous situations. Clearly, these methods don't work, but because it seems to give you some minor short-term alleviation from the nervous symptoms it tricks you into believing it works.... that continue plays out over and over again in all sorts of avoidance strategies. If left untreated anxiety disorder can lead to agoraphobia where sufferer using the ultimate avoidance strategy which is complete avoidance of all social situations... which obviously, works short term to alleviate nervous symptoms for all the wrong reasons!

The only way to overcome anxiety is to "expose" yourself to nervous situations (ie nervous symptoms) without using avoidance techniques... and don't get tricked into perceiving the symptoms of nervousness as dangerous - this is a critical insight into preventing any panic cycle arising.

Exposure, exposure, exposure to all the anxious thoughts & nervous feelings is key. The more exposure without any avoidance means your starting to tolerate those anxiety attacks better. You need to start reframing all the anxious thoughts as merely symptomatic of the nervous illness and don't buy into their meaning. The anxious thoughts are going to tell you all sorts of terrible calamities in order for you to want to avoid exposure... but don't buy into their narrator. Go expose yourself to the nervous situation and stick around until the nervousness thoughts, feeling stop bothering you. The moment this happens you've stop being tricked by anxiety!
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Re: Need some advice help on freeing my mind

Postby ashley72 » Mon Aug 15, 2016 11:46 pm

Whatever you don't fight your unwanted or intrusive thoughts... accept all your thoughts good or bad even the intrusive ones which may even cause you fear or whip up sudden panic.

Fighting thoughts, by avoidance or distraction only makes those thoughts more problematic to the sufferer because of mechanism called positive feedback, which can occur in all feedback type systems where output cycles can feedback
Into input cycles.

This recommendation might seem paradoxical, but that is the anxiety trick that gets people so stuck in nervous illness.

Our nervous system uses feedback loops to operate, meaning we get a chance to consciously see our anxious thoughts and make our next decision (fight freeze or flee) which is the job of the amygdala, do we fight or accept these observed thoughts? It's always better to accept thoughts rather than take up a fight with them and unwittingly turn them into intrusive thoughts... that is really what enlightenment is all about. You always take the moderate - middle path of the dualistic nature of all conceptual thinking rather than black and white (extreme, all or nothing thinking styles). Extreme thinking styles promote hate, rage & anger. This is the whole point of meditation, to train you into seeing how feedback works into relation to observing arising thoughts, fears in our mind.

Thoughts can arise so quickly in our minds, particular anger that we don't see we have a chance to regulate ourselves back to calmness using feedback. You don't avoid the thought or distract yourself from Angry thoughts, you see that it's far better to consider other non angry perspectives that promote calmness and understanding.

Using feedback to moderate perspectives towards the middle (away from position of extremities - black & white thinking) is the key insight.
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