Making Decisions without resorting to Egoism

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Making Decisions without resorting to Egoism

Postby jtightlips21 » Wed Oct 26, 2016 5:39 am

How do I make decisions without being caught up into judgment or overthinking? Sometimes we can overthink our decisions, like choosing a major to study, what kind of job to look for, or where to go on Vacation. Other times, a choice involves changing undesirable situations, like a bad job, an abusive relationship, or some type of addiction, which has some aspect of judgment. I think we sometimes feel the need to justify our decisions. But on the other hand I think that not making decisions can create an ego of passivism.
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Re: Making Decisions without resorting to Egoism

Postby smiileyjen101 » Wed Nov 02, 2016 3:13 am

Great question J
Can you see the way you widened your perspective on your own question after asking it?

That's kind of it (for me) - looking at the wider 'environment' curiously, discerningly, and honestly.
In totality no thing is right, or wrong. There is right for me in this moment - in the next moment or for others the 'answer' may be totally different, depending on what one is aware of, capable of and willing about.

In an ethics subject I did once it espoused the notion that what is right/wrong must be able to be applied universally, and very little can. Therefore we do need to discern - - not 'judge' as right or wrong, but discern (notice) what is 'best' for us in this moment and this situation, and balancing that it does no harm to another - now that can be universally applied --- the success of the application though will be everyone's degrees of awareness, capacity and willingness.

Play with it - notice the degrees of awareness, capacity & willingness in your own decision making and actions.

Notice, don't judge.
Be curious, not sure.
Be confident, not arrogant.
:)
Our rights start deep within our humanity; they end where another's begin~~ SmileyJen
http://www.balancinginfluences.com
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Re: Making Decisions without resorting to Egoism

Postby dijmart » Wed Nov 02, 2016 3:31 am

Nice post Jen! :)
Take what you like and leave the rest.
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Re: Making Decisions without resorting to Egoism

Postby jtightlips21 » Wed Nov 02, 2016 5:23 am

smiileyjen101 wrote:Great question J
Can you see the way you widened your perspective on your own question after asking it?

That's kind of it (for me) - looking at the wider 'environment' curiously, discerningly, and honestly.
In totality no thing is right, or wrong. There is right for me in this moment - in the next moment or for others the 'answer' may be totally different, depending on what one is aware of, capable of and willing about.

In an ethics subject I did once it espoused the notion that what is right/wrong must be able to be applied universally, and very little can. Therefore we do need to discern - - not 'judge' as right or wrong, but discern (notice) what is 'best' for us in this moment and this situation, and balancing that it does no harm to another - now that can be universally applied --- the success of the application though will be everyone's degrees of awareness, capacity and willingness.

Play with it - notice the degrees of awareness, capacity & willingness in your own decision making and actions.

Notice, don't judge.
Be curious, not sure.
Be confident, not arrogant.
:)


Great points. I know its sometimes hard not to feel the need to resort to the Ego to justify a decision. Which I sometimes see with the egocentric society that we feel so obligated to justify our choice, which is often seeking an approved judgment.
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Re: Making Decisions without resorting to Egoism

Postby smiileyjen101 » Tue Nov 08, 2016 7:02 am

ET talks about knowing that ego is in the driver's seat if you're making
Enemy
Obstacle
Means to an end

of a person, thing or situation.

The first two are pretty easy to spot, the third --- means to an end --- is probably the trickiest one for me.

If the response to a person, thing or situation is not authentic itself, it's probably twisted as a means to an end. (eg if I'm 'nice', if I choose the 'right' subject/job/thing ... people will like me), or others will think I'm successful if I do x

That's not to say that 'reason' doesn't come into the discerning of it, it does - and as long as you could explain on the front page of the newspaper and nobody be surprised... that's authentic reasoning :D
(there's probably nothing I'd 'actually' do that would surprise anyone anymore :lol: )

The clarifier from ET - the flip-side of this is if you are in a state of either acceptance, enjoyment or enthusiasm then you are in the driver's seat, not your ego -- so then if you need to work and are factoring that in to take a job that may not be your ideal, but it's all that's on offer now, so be it ---- in this moment, this is what is required of me - --- acceptance
you can still pour your joy into doing that job
you can even be enthusiastic.

Otherwise you just know you're going to be playing in enemy, obstacle, means to an end territory.

Make sense?
Our rights start deep within our humanity; they end where another's begin~~ SmileyJen
http://www.balancinginfluences.com
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