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What is Confidence?

Posted: Sat May 27, 2017 3:02 pm
by fortune
I'm starting to get the impression that real confidence and ego confidence are two different things. A lot of people try to persuade you and have the notion that real confidence is being more extraverted or focusing on attainment. Due to meditating over the past decade and an interest in spirituality I've found I've become so self aware that i'm aware of emotions that rise within myself such as confidence and fear, so much so that I've separated myself from them. I feel i need a dose of confidence to deal with the everyday goings on of life but i'm unsure of what real confidence is. Although I do find that the stronger my awareness the more confidence i feel but i'm not sure how to direct that.

How do I bring forth real confidence and not get wrapped up in the ego's version of confidence of personal possession and attainment?

Re: What is Confidence?

Posted: Sat May 27, 2017 3:57 pm
by dijmart
I feel i need a dose of confidence to deal with the everyday goings on of life but i'm unsure of what real confidence is.
I think one has to have a certain amount of confidence to perform action, so one is not constantly doubting their abilities. How could you drive a car if you didn't have confidence in your driving ability or get a job or parent a child? Those are just a few examples.

I think you are confusing normal everyday confidence with "inflated" confidence.

Re: What is Confidence?

Posted: Sat May 27, 2017 11:30 pm
by painBody
Great question, and an important one in this world. I've long pondered this.

noun
1. full trust; belief in the powers, trustworthiness, or reliability of a person or thing:
2. belief in oneself and one's powers or abilities; self-confidence; self-reliance; assurance:


Seems to me that the concept of confidence exists *only* within the egoic realm. Only the ego needs some kind of assurance in one's own abilities or in the successful outcome of a future event. Sadly, what most people think of as "confidence" is really arrogance, and ironically, insecurity. It's insecurity disguised as its polar opposite. The worst definition of "confidence" I've heard is one of "walking with your chest out", when posture, in reality, is determined by core musculature.

When you transcend the ego and dwell in the formless realm, that whole concept becomes entirely meaningless. There is no self-esteem because there is no real self and because it doesn't matter what someone else *thinks* of you. There is no worrying about the outcome of a future event because there is no future, only the present moment. When you dwell in the present moment, you almost don't care what happens because you trust in whatever happens, you're aligned with it.

That said, I think what comes closest to the concept of "real confidence", on the level of form and ego, is *knowing yourself* and *being yourself* ... know your strengths and weaknesses, accept them, admit them to yourself and others, and work with them. When you're in tune with yourself, you don't have a continual need to show off or put others down. On the contrary, true confidence brings with it, humility. That is true confidence, if you have to define that term.