Self or Nothingness, a choice

This is the place to post whatever questions you have related to the teachings of Eckhart Tolle. The rest of us will do whatever we can to help you achieve a better understanding :)
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fallingIntoNow
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Joined: Thu Apr 12, 2018 7:26 am

Self or Nothingness, a choice

Post by fallingIntoNow » Sun Oct 21, 2018 9:30 pm

Suffering or choosing "Nothingness". That is the theme of this post, and I thank you for indulging me and reading it.

I am coming off the tail of a flare-up of my pain-body. This is where I feel "out of control" and unable to reel back from my thoughts, which create a nightmarish reality. These episodes can sustain for days and weeks. Fortunately, I was able to curb its destructive tendency by focusing hard and steady on the presence of this moment; I went to a quiet park at night and sat there, trying to taste the stillness.

In these moments I tried sensing my body, where the sticky, acidic emotions reside. I wanted to feel them, from a place of objectivity. I wanted to realize that they were not me. I wanted to rise above.

This brings me to the crux of this post. Choosing suffering or nothingness. For when I bring my attention more fully to the presence of this moment, I feel like I am leaving myself behind. But there are parts of this self that I love and cherish. My compassion, my curiosity, my creativity. I feel like by going into the nothingness of this moment, I am abandoning these traits that make me "me". I am afraid of being "nothing".

Now I imagine one of you may say that it is a choice between suffering and peace but can there be redeeming qualities in the suffering? Can there be loss or grief in the peace?

Thank you

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rachMiel
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Location: Pittsford

Re: Self or Nothingness, a choice

Post by rachMiel » Tue Oct 23, 2018 11:48 pm

Choosing suffering or nothingness.

Neither sounds like much fun! Although nothingness, if done up right a la Buddhist emptiness can be massively freeing.

Are you sure you need to pick one or the other?
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily ...

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