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Question about feeling your emotions

Posted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 1:13 am
by Placebo
Hey everyone, Hope all is well.

I have a quick question about something I tend to get confused about. So..we know that we are supposed allow and fully feel our emotions (good and bad)

Now sometimes I wonder if I'm simply letting my emotions be and feeling them, or if I'm giving them too much attention and therefore, prolonging them.

Any insight on ways to tell the difference? Thanks guys

Re: Question about feeling your emotions

Posted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 3:02 am
by happygrl
emotions themselves don't last that long really only a few seconds. Feel them and let them pass through you, don't focus on them or label them, just let them go

Re: Question about feeling your emotions

Posted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 5:58 am
by LoveRei
If you are thinking about them, or even worrying about prolonging them at the moment of observation, or perhaps even now, there looks to be a good chance you might be prolonging them, simply because you think or worry about it. Are you identifying with them?

Observing emotions, even if unbearable, is ok.
Surrendering to the moment, letting them be, letting them come and go, or even stay, is ok.

One time when the emotion was so negative i couldn't bear it, it seemed to drag my whole body down into a slump. I felt i had no choice but to just surrender to it. From that point of surrender, it is possible to be the observer once again, and observe what is there now, even if unpleasant. The act of observation allows for just that bit of room to let it be what it is.
The heavy emotion lasted a few days, but not forever.

Re: Question about feeling your emotions

Posted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 9:56 pm
by Placebo
happygrl wrote:
Tue Feb 11, 2020 3:02 am
emotions themselves don't last that long really only a few seconds. Feel them and let them pass through you, don't focus on them or label them, just let them go

Awesome thanks. This makes total sense. I see what I'm doing wrong. I am allowing them and not trying to push them away but I also focus on them and label them as well sometimes.

I'm trying to also practice forms of catharsis which gets me confused. Because I'm trying to release old trauma and emotions so I sometimes feel that I'm supposed to focus on them to get them out but what I may really be doing is feeding the pain body? Maybe I should just focus on letting everything be first for a while?

Re: Question about feeling your emotions

Posted: Tue Feb 11, 2020 10:08 pm
by Placebo
LoveRei wrote:
Tue Feb 11, 2020 5:58 am
If you are thinking about them, or even worrying about prolonging them at the moment of observation, or perhaps even now, there looks to be a good chance you might be prolonging them, simply because you think or worry about it. Are you identifying with them?

Observing emotions, even if unbearable, is ok.
Surrendering to the moment, letting them be, letting them come and go, or even stay, is ok.

One time when the emotion was so negative i couldn't bear it, it seemed to drag my whole body down into a slump. I felt i had no choice but to just surrender to it. From that point of surrender, it is possible to be the observer once again, and observe what is there now, even if unpleasant. The act of observation allows for just that bit of room to let it be what it is.
The heavy emotion lasted a few days, but not forever.
Yes I can definitely relate. That's of the biggest things that helped me is allowing myself to feel bad, even welcoming it since I had been running from my emotions all my life. Now I just observe them. (But sometimes give them to much focus)

I realized that trying to block everything causing all that built up horrible tension in the body and exhaustion feels worse than having to fully allow even the worst emotions. This is true for me at least.

Re: Question about feeling your emotions

Posted: Fri Feb 21, 2020 4:47 am
by LoveRei
Placebo wrote:
Tue Feb 11, 2020 10:08 pm

I realized that trying to block everything causing all that built up horrible tension in the body and exhaustion feels worse than having to fully allow even the worst emotions. This is true for me at least.
Totally agree.
And meditation seems to help with the body awareness too. If the body is screaming from exhaustion, it will become very evident in meditation. It all just becomes evident and obvious what the best course of action is from there (if any).

Re: Question about feeling your emotions

Posted: Fri Feb 21, 2020 4:56 pm
by Webwanderer
Placebo wrote:
Tue Feb 11, 2020 1:13 am
I have a quick question about something I tend to get confused about. So..we know that we are supposed allow and fully feel our emotions (good and bad)

Now sometimes I wonder if I'm simply letting my emotions be and feeling them, or if I'm giving them too much attention and therefore, prolonging them.
All the advice on observing emotions stated here is certainly the right tract. I suggest however, that you take it a step further and consider the context of the observation. It's one thing to observe the the feeling of painful emotions, but it's more clarifying and effective to be genuinely curious about the origins of those emotions. We feel painful emotions in direct relationship to our underlying beliefs that triggered the emotion that bothers us.

Ask yourself 'what makes me feel this way?' This is not a question to look outwardly, but rather to feel inwardly. These deeply held beliefs that trigger emotions may take a while to reveal themselves, but that is the point of curious observation. Hold the desire to understand the origins of your emotions and they will reveal themselves in time.

The practice of quiet observation and genuine interest is a practice of spiritual alignment with specific goals in mind. It is the practice of 'ask and receive' in action. The answers to all your questions lie within you. It is the meditative practice of developing familiarity with the aligned state that will make the changes you seek possible.

WW

Re: Question about feeling your emotions

Posted: Sun Feb 23, 2020 4:51 am
by Placebo
Thanks for the great advice WW. I tend to sometimes get overwhelming emotions like fear or anger towards small things and I'm definitely going to keep practicing looking inward. I think there is a lot I don't understand about myself. I had been trying to force every negative emotion or sensation away my whole life to protect myself from experiencing more trauma which I endured at a very young age. I'm almost kinda scared of what kinds of feelings I've repressed haha. But I can't wait to see everything unfold and eventually find the peace that I seek.