it doesn't matter what to do?

This is the place to post whatever questions you have related to the teachings of Eckhart Tolle. The rest of us will do whatever we can to help you achieve a better understanding :)
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astaroth
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it doesn't matter what to do?

Post by astaroth » Sat Sep 22, 2007 6:15 pm

hi!

I understood theoretically that I am not my mind, not the content, but the screen itself. This is all okay. And I thank you for this. But for me this is only clear as long as I'm not doing anything.

What I don't understand is, is that "it doesn't matter what you do".

For example I'm sitting in the garden, observing my thoughts, going back to silence as often as possible - what you can also call meditating. After some time I'm getting bored and want to do something (I also observe this as not me). And there the questions start:

Is that my ego what tells me to do something because it tries to escpae the "scary place inside" how I always used to? I always tried not be "alone with myself". Today I know that this "other myself" is just an illusion but, of course, it still speaks. So I think "Okay, it's my ego, dont act like it wants, but face the scary place inside with patience and compassion"
Then I remember: "It doesn't matter what to do. Don't resist your wish to do something. Isn't this just sitting and meditating maybe also an idea in my mind, an idea about the spiritual guy, just sitting, not acting like his thoughts wants to tell him? Isn't this also a kind of resistance?"
Have I silently fallen back to identification? Is that my ego what whispers in my ear?
But what should I do, if it's like that, at all? When all wishes to do something is just ego-stuff... I don't think so. Is it just the judging of this wish what is ego-stuff? Or is it more complicated?
what does that mean, that action flows spontaneously without thoughts, when you are enlightened? is it just like when you are unconscious, but are doing something without thinking at all, when you are in a very good mood, when you are "in the flow"?

Shell I, when a wish to do something appears, just do it - without giving resistance to it and watch myself like an actor in a movie?
But what about addicts? What comes from the ego? Is wishing, wanting some different that what is right now = ego? Or is the ego just what has to do with "I am xy"? Or is it all the same? I'm so confused...

What does it mean, it doesn't matter what to do? If it really doesn't matter I could just act like I did when I was completely unconscious... What about when I'm with people and something comes into my mind I could tell, is that just to "be the man in the middle", what really sounds like ego-stuff. Is that my ego what wants me to say? Or is it just the one making problems about all this?
Maybe these are all stupid question... I think "what should be the problem about this all? Do it or don't. It doesn't matter. It's just your ego creating problems." But I don't understand this deeply.

I used to remember something what really helped me: "What would be the mind with all it's problems?" what was really comfortable 8) But even this doesn't help me right now

To come back to the garden-question: I stand up and watch some television and - of course - the observer is completely away. I recognise this and so I become more present and suddenly the television isn't exciting any more. It's just pictures and sounds. Then I think "It's as good as I had kept sitting in the garden". I'm again confronted with all the never-ending negative thoughts - and they are ALWAYS there when I'm "alone with myself" - I don't know if it's the painbody. I don't feel any emotion. Am I just not able to? I'm at these times not really sad. It's not really sadness. It's more doubts if what I'm doing is right (and these thoughts are the reason I post here, i must say).

What about doubts? What is their nature?

I maybe already know the answer "Just observe them. Know that it's not you and they will slip." But how shell I when I'm not sure if my way is right?

I don't even know what exactly me questions are - but maybe you can give me some good advice. I really need it.

Thanx and blessings to you all
I don't feel good.

I have always been a guy acting almost only out of my head, not of my feelings. Shell I first learn to feel my feelings to make me able to disidentify of them?

astaroth
...you might remember me from such educational films as "Zen for couch-potatoes - The wisdom of never doing anything" or "Buddha from da hood - Was he a brother?"

weichen
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Post by weichen » Sat Sep 22, 2007 7:26 pm

Hi, astaroth
When did you first seriously follow spiritual teaching ? If you compare yourself right now with yourself at that time, do you see huge difference in things you do (or things that interest you) ?

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Post by Webwanderer » Sat Sep 22, 2007 8:16 pm

astaroth wrote:I understood theoretically that I am not my mind, not the content, but the screen itself. This is all okay. And I thank you for this. But for me this is only clear as long as I'm not doing anything.

What I don't understand is, is that "it doesn't matter what you do".
There are two primary types of understanding.

There is analytical understanding that is worked out in the mind, sort of like fitting together pieces of a puzzle. This is the domain of the search for truth. Seeking this type of understanding is long and circuitous. While a certain amount of analytical clarification is useful, all the analysis in the world of water will not quench your thirst.

The enlightening understanding, that which brings genuine realization, comes through direct experience. It is by deepening presence in silent awareness that experiential understanding of being blossoms.

“It doesn’t matter what you do” because all doing is the same in that it is all content within what you are. What you are is what you seek. Awakening is the remembrance and recognition of that which already is. You are the seeing, the awareness of what is.

Boredom is the result of attempts to understand with a mind that is not capable of genuine experience. Experience is the domain of awareness. Mind can only imagine. Therefore it hungers for more informational input in order to continue it's sense of actual identity. In doing so, attempts to understand solely through mental efforts, do more to distract from genuine understanding than to enhance it.

It is by resting in silent emptiness, open to whatever is present, that understanding of being, beyond mind, becomes clear. If (or when) you become bored, observe your boredom as you would the flowers and trees. Be at peace with it. There is nothing wrong with being bored that the mind does not make it so. There is wonderment available in all present content, even boredom. Enjoy the moment.

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Post by astaroth » Sat Sep 22, 2007 8:23 pm

@weichen:
One and a half years ago I read the big, black book "In search of the miraculous" of Gurdjieff. Since this I have read about several spiritual and other paths and tried to practise it, but my fear is following me like black shadow. I was dissapointed several times and then searched on, almost every minute I thought about it - or better: tried not to.
I have read Tolle one month ago, but had rea it before half a year ago and then turned another path. I read Tolle again and I suddenly felt: This is the right way. I was so sure about and I'm still. I think my search has had an end.
But I'm thinking too much and can't let go my inner voice and my feelings. I'm still scared of it.




edit:
@webwanderer: oh shit, very good answer. my mind resists heavily to accept what it has just read. thank you a lot, you couldn't have said better.

edit 2:
shit... something just has made "clack". I'm that what sees everything inside and outside. i can't thank you as much as I want, these were very, very good words!
Last edited by astaroth on Sat Sep 22, 2007 8:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.
...you might remember me from such educational films as "Zen for couch-potatoes - The wisdom of never doing anything" or "Buddha from da hood - Was he a brother?"

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Post by Webwanderer » Sat Sep 22, 2007 8:46 pm

There is nothing wrong with being scared. It's just more content within awareness. Allow it to be present. Give it space to exist and feel it fully without resistance. See it for the content within awareness that it is, just part of the diversity of living as form.

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Post by Seancho » Sat Sep 22, 2007 8:57 pm

:arrow: :arrow: :arrow: :wink:
Last edited by Seancho on Sat Sep 22, 2007 8:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.
If you stop believing in fear, is it still scary?

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Post by Seancho » Sat Sep 22, 2007 8:58 pm

I understand, maybe, what you are feeling. You are confused.

Heres the thing...you should be confused. Why? Because you are. Theres nobody else that can be confused in just the way you are.

You dont know what to do. Nor should you know what to do. Because you dont. Its perfect that way. Just as it should be.

You feel bad, and thats completely correct. That is the way for you feel. You are doing it exactly right.

If its you doing, thats perfect. If its the ego doing, thats perfect. Unconscious, perfect. Conscious, perfect. You cannot fail to do what you do. As you do it. The way it should be done.

Whatever you do is the exact right thing. Because you are doing it.

Everything that happens, everything you do, is exactly right. The confusion, the indecision. You have a part to play, and you are playing it perfectly.

What if somebody offered you an acting job. And the part was to play a certain person.....a confused, pained German spiritual seeker named astaroth. Could you play that part? Could you play all the indecision, confusion, doubt, pain? Imagine how joyful it would be to play that part perfectly. Better than anyone.

You got the part.

So yes. It doesnt matter what you do. Just do it.

You already are.
If you stop believing in fear, is it still scary?

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astaroth
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Post by astaroth » Sat Sep 22, 2007 9:06 pm

I understand, o shit, I understand.
No, wrong, I don't understand.
I feel.
I see. Oh shit!!!

I wasn't sure if I should post this question here because for me everything was so confusing that I din't exactly know what it was. I have played my own little part very convincing, I think. hahahaha

I'm free!!! I've always been
doubts still there, but content
...you might remember me from such educational films as "Zen for couch-potatoes - The wisdom of never doing anything" or "Buddha from da hood - Was he a brother?"

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Post by Seancho » Sat Sep 22, 2007 9:19 pm

Perfect. :lol:
If you stop believing in fear, is it still scary?

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Post by kiki » Sat Sep 22, 2007 9:39 pm

Great post, Seancho - just wonderful!

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astaroth
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Post by astaroth » Sat Sep 22, 2007 10:00 pm

Can only say the same :wink:
maybe the something in you now thinks: "That's why I do the job here. Helping lost souls free from their mind."
Good job, Doctor Webwanderer and Doctor Seancho :mrgreen:
...you might remember me from such educational films as "Zen for couch-potatoes - The wisdom of never doing anything" or "Buddha from da hood - Was he a brother?"

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Post by BrahmanEternal » Sat Sep 22, 2007 11:35 pm

Just wow. :)

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Post by spikyface » Wed Sep 26, 2007 2:44 pm

haha the way you kept saying shit was fuuuuuunny

Me like *claps*

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