My parents........

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Tony-S-Ma
Posts: 359
Joined: Tue Mar 31, 2009 4:07 pm

Re: My parents........

Post by Tony-S-Ma » Sat May 30, 2009 1:04 pm

It is interesting to reflect my parents' thinking and feeling functions and their impact on me and my sister.

My father was a writer and had a very good logical thinking mind. He was emotionally much more gentle than my mother and very idealistic and impractical as far as worldly things are concerned. He originally wished to go into journalism, but the Communist Party put him into philosophical studying. My father was always amongst the top tier in his classes after junior high school. He taught and wrote about Marxist philosophy for life. He was well respected by his colleagues. My father used his emotion to express himself a lot more in his debate with his colleagues. My father did not mind to work hard to get his jobs done. My father loved books. The best quality of my father was his honesty, and he would not lie about his feeling. I truly learned honesty from him.

My mother was a very strong willed woman. She had some artistic talent in drawing and painting with water colors. She did not show her tender side very much. My impression of her was that she was a lot tougher than all the mothers of my childhood aquaintences. I always felt a mother should be much tender than her. She originally wished to go into diplomacy, but the Communist Party put her into law studying. She hated it so much and so she really did work hard on the subject. And eventually she was put into history study about the Communist Party.My mother told me that she did really well in schools and university until the Communist Party putting her into law study. She was much more practical than my father, and more nibble physically than my father. She loved gardening and flower planting. The best quality of my mother was that she was able to endure ill treatments by others without showing weakness.

My parents in many ways were very complimentary. They loved each very very very much. I was very romantic growing up because of my parents' relationship. I felt jealous of their relationship when I was young. I felt neglected emotionally by them. They were good for each other, but not very good parents according to my childish standard.

I was the first born, and planed. School work was always easy to me. I have strong emotional side, and I tried very hard to hide it as a child to show others that I was a tough boy. Now I know that my toughness is from my mother side which is emotional, not mental. I am more gentle inside than my appearance. Most people can not read me. As far as thinking function development is concerned, I loved Mathematics because it is not emotional. It is well suited for me to hide my emotional side. I think Mathematics studying helped a lot for my thinking. Emotionally, I was not well trained even though I have a huge potential to develop. Not many teachers know training and teaching feelings.

My sister was an accident according to my parents. She was not as good as I was as far as school work was concerned. She has my mother's strong will, however, she is much tender than my mother. Still she is very tough due to her being the less favorite in upbringing. As far as thinking function development is concerned, she is the weakest in my family. She lose all the time when four of us playing games involving thinking function. I think she was more neglected due to my parents' lack of knowledge in training thinking function.

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When I first got into awakening business, I wished that I could get out my misery in Life. The more I am into the awakening business, the more I recognize that I need to retrain myself to be a different person. Awakening to me is no longer some clever understanding and endless bliss, it is an opportunity to become a child again to be what one really wishes to be after experience adult life. It is like a conscious birth and I have a say in what I am. Jesus states the Truth: "You must be born again."

At least I know now that I am able to consciously fool around with my sensing, my feeling and thinking to get me more into attach with my intuiting. "The kingdom of Heaven is with you".

When one is born, he has no ability to manipulate his sensing, feeling and thinking. He becomes who/what he is largely based on external influences. Awakening offers him an opportunity to intuit the Kingdom of Heaven within. This in turn gives him the opportunity to consciously manipulate his sensing, feeling and thinking. He, therefore, becomes a master of his inner world, a true individual.

Those ancients who had this knowledge hided it in various forms through arts, philosophy, traditional rituals, religion, and etc. due to the fact that inner worlds are the source of the outer world manifestations. The world we experience is manifestations of our collective inner worlds.

When your sensing, feeling, thinking and intuiting becomes one, manifestation becomes instantaneous. Water changes into wine is such manifestation. All miracles of Jesus were facts of such instantaneous manifestation. These are the melting down of inner and outer separation.

The bullshit understanding about oneness of All comes from experiencing such melt downs. If one has not experience such melt down, or have not yet have a peek at it in real life, his teaching of awakening is bullshit copying of others.

ET did experience such melt down, so he is not bullshitting, even though his experience was accidental because his aim was not at the total melt-down. Even now he does not have the knowledge of consciously melting down the separation of inner and outer world. His living in present is only his understanding of his melting-down experience.

Sevenworlds also experienced such melt down accidentally without knowledge of consciously melting down the separation. So was U.G. Krishnamurti, and Ramana Maharshi. The key to such knowledge is from the function of intuition, not the intuition we commonly know. This function only comes out more strongly when one suffers to develop his sensing, feeling and thinking function more.

Please do not waste you time in awakening business unless you truly wishes to melt-down the inner outer world separation for yourself and truly experience personally the oneness of All.

This is my last post in this forum. Thank you everyone for endure with me until I discovered the true purpose that I wandered into this forum.

May those brave ones who wishes to experience Oneness of All sees the light shining within them. May they be blessed over abundantly on their courageous journey for humanity.

May Grace be upon all those wishes to know Truth.

May God be with those who have faith.

May Love of Jesus radiate more on the world.

May those who are kind in their heart find Home.

May those who work hard receive their due.

May true thinkers enjoy their labors.

May all true seekers experience Truth.

May True Knowledge be more available to educate children in the outer world.

Truth and Love is ONE and ALL

Tony

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