Please help...

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Please help...

Postby student2u » Sun Jun 07, 2009 3:38 pm

Hi everyone one,

I'm considering about changing my job partly (if not all) because I want to be present...

The situation is at my current job, something not so pleasant happened and my ego keeps telling me I was a victim and I have practiced a lot of forgiveness and I feel I can make peace with the situation now. However, it can be difficult at times when the old stories would pop back up in my mind. I feel I can be more easily present if I go to a new work place with new people around...

My confusion is whether I should take the challenge and try to be present as much as possible or take the easy way and be present at a new environment. I believe ET said challenging situation is good for practice of awareness, but he also said acceptance, enjoyment and enthusiasm are the three modalities of awakened doing.

Any insight will be greatly appreciated.

peace : )
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Re: Please help...

Postby johny » Sun Jun 07, 2009 3:39 pm

Follow your hunches. Life will always give you right answer.
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Re: Please help...

Postby student2u » Sun Jun 07, 2009 3:47 pm

Thanks for your response, but my hunches are not working now because I'm still so confused (I've been swinging back and forth for weeks).

If I stay, I feel sometimes I may send out negative energy and "contaminate our beautiful earth"; if I leave, certain people I work with may get mad - indirectly I generate negative energy and "contaminate our beautiful earth"...

I hope it's not me making it complicated?

a grateful student : )
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Re: Please help...

Postby Hand » Sun Jun 07, 2009 3:52 pm

Hi student2u

In my opinion, if you leave now, you will be missing out on what the situation has to teach you, that is to ACCEPT what is happening and not resist it.

Just be in the moment and accept what is happening in that moment. What is, is.

Good luck, let us know how you get on, whether you stay or go.
Life is. Accept Life. Peace reigns.
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Re: Please help...

Postby student2u » Sun Jun 07, 2009 4:37 pm

Thank you Hand - that's a very good reminder...

I did think about what I can learn from the situation while at the same time I feel it's holding me back on my spiritual development...

I believe it will come to me and in the meantime I will try to be in the moment as you reminded so thanks again : )
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Re: Please help...

Postby erict » Sun Jun 07, 2009 5:54 pm

student2u wrote:I'm considering about changing my job partly (if not all) because I want to be present...


Sounds like you want to change your job so that you won't be bothered by the baggage you have with this place and the events that occurred there. You want a new place, where you believe you would feel better. But this has nothing to do with being present or acceptance. If that was your top priority, then that's what you would be focusing on. Being present and accepting wherever you are.

Now I'm not saying you shouldn't change jobs, if this place is making you unhappy, just be clear with yourself why you're doing it and what you will accomplish.

And when the new place starts triggering the same mechanisms of victimhood or whatever they are. What then? You'll run from that too? This is kind of the whole point of the teachings, an inner shift, rather then a focus on rearranging the outer circumstances in the way the ego finds most suitable.
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Re: Please help...

Postby student2u » Sun Jun 07, 2009 6:14 pm

Hi erict,

Thank you so very much for your response. I can feel that you have truly perceived the situation...

I did question myself if the same mechanism would be triggered again while I do feel I may have a good chance to be able to stay more in the moment in a new environment. A "friend" at the current job supports me (actually my ego) and keeps pulling me (my thoughts or my ego) back to the victim role and I find it hard to get out of it completely with this friend around. I'm now holding some space from this friend and at the same time, I really don't want to hurt this friend and other people involved. A very sticky situation...

I'll remember the "whole point of the teachings" and I'm deeply grateful..
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Re: Please help...

Postby johny » Sun Jun 07, 2009 6:34 pm

In my case its quite simple. If its logic than its not hunch. Lol. I maybe wrong but who cares.
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Re: Please help...

Postby student2u » Sun Jun 07, 2009 6:44 pm

You are too deep for me johny LOL

I mean I appreciate it : )
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Re: Please help...

Postby Sighclone » Sun Jun 07, 2009 7:43 pm

You say:
A "friend" at the current job supports me (actually my ego) and keeps pulling me (my thoughts or my ego) back to the victim role ...


Friends only pull us into roles if we let them. Friends are not perfect and have their own unconscious reasons for acting. Open a discussion with your friend about the sentence you wrote above. You will then discover what kind of friend you have. (This is not a suggestion that he/she is not a friend, by the way...just that the character of that relationship may have some unwritten rules.)

You say :
something not so pleasant happened and my ego keeps telling me I was a victim and I have practiced a lot of forgiveness and I feel I can make peace with the situation now. However, it can be difficult at times when the old stories would pop back up in my mind. I feel I can be more easily present if I go to a new work place with new people around...


The event is in the past. You re-energize its impact on you by dwelling on it. You may have been victimized, you may not have been victimized. You were not fired. Like the monk who watched his friend carry the young woman across the puddle, you carry the event with you. And you will carry it with you wherever you are as long as you choose to. Try the Sedona Method to let it go. Just buy the book -- it works. Switching jobs is secondary to holding onto past perceived injustices.

But if switching jobs has appeal for you independent of your event or your friend, do it very cognitively, not emotionally -- the economy is tough now...you might have a harder go of it than you think.

And welcome to the forum!

Namaste, Andy
A person is not a thing or a process, but an opening through which the universe manifests. - Martin Heidegger
There is not past, no future; everything flows in an eternal present. - James Joyce
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Re: Please help...

Postby erict » Sun Jun 07, 2009 7:56 pm

student2u,

While I'm all for improving our lives, I think it's important to remember that the highest form of freedom is the freedom to experience everything, whatever comes up, without getting too caught up in it. So while it would be cool and possibly an improvement if you move to a new environment, what would be an improvement of a whole other order, is if you achieve the kind of inner change, where similar situations and patters would no longer have so much power over you. Then, outer circumstances will matter less and less. You can't always control outer circumstances to the extent that would keep the ego happy, and even in initiating changes, like in your case, a new job, you can't really know what expects you there and if it would be better or might even be worse... :)
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Re: Please help...

Postby karmarider » Sun Jun 07, 2009 9:41 pm

erict wrote:... the highest form of freedom is the freedom to experience everything ...


Beautiful.
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Re: Please help...

Postby student2u » Sun Jun 07, 2009 9:59 pm

Thank you Sighclone – I appreciate what you are saying…that “friend” does have a big heart and different ways in seeing and handling things. I don’t feel I’m holding onto past perceived injustices but maybe I haven’t completely let it go? I will check out Sedona Method and thank you for your kind insight…

Erict - your posts are helping me immeasurably…thank you so very much!!

Everyone seems to have much confidence in me that I can face the kind of challenge at my current job. I guess I will face the challenge and stay in the moment/be conscious regardless of the outer circumstances…

Yes karmarider – it is beautiful – “... the highest form of freedom is the freedom to experience everything ...”

I truly appreciate the energy field here and thank you all for your helpful response. I hope I can be back with some progress (I know I’m still a “work in progress”) : )
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Re: Please help...

Postby erict » Sun Jun 07, 2009 10:13 pm

student2u wrote:Erict - your posts are helping me immeasurably…thank you so very much!!


It's kind of funny, because when I was writing the first post and after posting it, I almost deleted it, feeling like it's BS. :)

Everyone seems to have much confidence in me that I can face the kind of challenge at my current job. I guess I will face the challenge and stay in the moment/be conscious regardless of the outer circumstances…


I don't want you to think I'm advocating staying with your current job or anything. When it comes to making decisions like this, I've noticed the following in my life. When I just think about it, and try to figure out the right choice regarding something important, I just get confused mostly, because there's so much uncertainty, you can't really know what the right choice is. But what works for me, is just always following the next logical step, without jumping ahead of myself. My mind often comes up with ideas for what would be good for me to do, but most often they don't feel right (or just not relevant for right now, however logical they sound), but on the other hand, I noticed that when something important needs to happen in my life, it just starts happening. It becomes the next obvious step and the next and so on. I don't mean to say effort is not involved, sometimes there's something that requires quite a bit of effort, but it's the obvious thing to be doing. It's a bit more about kind of learning to see where things are going at the moment and following that.
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Re: Please help...

Postby student2u » Mon Jun 08, 2009 4:04 am

Hi erict,

I'm so glad that you didn't delete that message as it may mean a lot to me, maybe more than we (including me) can imagine...

No need to be concerned whether or not you advocate my staying with my current job. I came here not to get a a direction but some sign so that I can feel what is probably the right move for now (as I needed to decide whether I would pursue a job application or not before it's taken). From what you and others' response, staying with my current job is what I feel the right move...it's not a very obvious one, but clear or light enough for me...

Whatever it's going to be, it's going to be...I'll let you know...I will probably need your support or encouragement: )

light, peace and love :)
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