Sleeping Problems.

Topics related to physical, emotional and psychological forms of pain and suffering
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Joined: Thu May 03, 2012 12:26 am

Sleeping Problems.

Post by ledfly » Thu May 03, 2012 9:17 am

I have always been a heavy sleeper, but always went to bed bit later then most i believe especially when younger. I never had much sleeping problems, just that i didnt get to sleep until it was late so i was very sleep when i had to get up, and i skipped school many times in a year, mainly because it was horrible for me to be there i think and there was no will to get up, subconsciously i kept myself sleeping, and i could say i was going and it would sound as i meant it but there was this deep underlying desire to not go that would hold me back, almost as if i was controlled out of my control. I need to be greatly motivated apparently to get up, have to be a genuine want to get up or i would struggle.

Thing is, 3 years ago i had probably what was the best moment in my life, i was blissfully happy and i would believe very peacefull hard to know exactly how i was, but there was something magical about everything then. I always vent to bed early and got up early, and i always could sleep immediately, i never had any problems. This lasted for 3-4 months maybe, thing is i have never been able to replicate it. Infact i have gotten a horrible sleeping problem after this period, i struggle to fall asleep at rigth time, and if i do not, i will stay awake for a couple hours, and my entire sleeping is distorted, i will wake up very sleepy, and i will be very exhausted through the day and i can feel i lack sleep.

When i come home i can barely stay awake and i go to bed early, but will wake up after exactly 2 hours every time. The sleep will never be continous. Now i could stay awake an entire nigth without sleep and go to bed early next day, and same will happen. Maybe i would get a couple hours again after some hours so i could sleep little before work, not a sufficient amount anyway, far from, and i would still feel tired and unrested, usually on the second day i will sleep well and continous... But aslong as i can sleep at rigth time every day i stay fine and i get my normal hours, but as soon as i cant sleep one nigth it's the same rollercoaster, and it is affecting me in a very bad way.

I meditate always when going to bed now, and i notice when i can get this soothing calmness i usually get to sleep at the rigth time. But i think 1 or 2 weeks is maximum this can keep up before im followed by a stretch of bad sleeping, sometimes it can go on for a week before i get sorted my sleeping. This is very exhausting over time. And i believe it is because of my ego, somewhere in my subconciousness a place i am not aware of i am creating this problem, but it is out of my reach and i do not know how to solve it nor reach it! But also, i think it have just been something i have witnessed in myself to begin with and that it did not get created by my thougt to begin with, this does in a way rule out ego. The only thing i can do is to try and be relaxed when i am going to sleep, not always succesfull. And it has become extremely tense this sleeping thing, alot of tension around it now. But before it was very natrual for me, it just worked like that.

I have this elderly woman who keep's nagging me a about this all the time, and keep bringing it into my consciousness, i ward it off tho and try not to think too muc habout it, and there are extremely loud place i sleep in, thing is before they both worked but now to old to work, so they didnt make much sound in the period i slept so nicely. But i have proven to myself that i can sleep throu the worst nigthmare of intense sound, ppl wouldnt believe that i could sleep thru it, it is that bad, sound is literally making shockwaves into my room as this 2 meter and 100kilo giant is walking, and he is not of the silent type, and he is restless, also is she, constantly doing something. So im not sure if that have anything to do with it, but it creates alot of stress for me i notice to have these ppl over me. I can say here now i would not do this to myself, to ruin my sleep, but at the same time, unconsciously i could. And i would still wake after 2 hours unable to sleep, wich i never ever had problems with before in my life after beeing that tired.. It just does not make sense!

I think to myself that complete peace is only solution, that i must achieve nirvana or something to ever be like it. And i can see no end to it, there is nothing suggesting that it will end. And now i am perhaps faced with a new job, and i failed in my last jobbecause of this because it simply got to stressfull and at some point i gave up on the inside and there was not a thing that could wake me, my will to get up was gone, and i would sleep thru the sound of my alarm, or unconsciously turn it of. Also i could say to myself i was going up, i even promissed myself, but even that did not work... It was like i couldnt control myself because there was just no will, it was like i lost control over myself.

Now i do realise it is probably near impossible to help me but, il give it a shot. I dont believe in something to be put into my body to get sleep because i never needed it before. It's like a impossible mystery. All i know of is to ask God to help me but no solution have come or better sleep.


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Re: Sleeping Problems.

Post by far_eastofwest » Sat May 05, 2012 2:00 am

instead of worrying about sleeping, perhaps look at it the opposite way, to me it appears you have a problem with waking up!

with getting up for the alarm, just train yourself.
lay on your bed on day off, relax, and set your alarm to go off in 10 minutes. when it goes off, get up straight away and have a drink or do something.
do this several times a day .... soon your body will get used to leaping up when the alarm goes.

I read your other post.... going from that one, it seems you are not toooooo tired to do things you enjoy.... certainly not a post i would expect from someone who is too tired to get up for work and has problems with being exhausted!
Perhaps you have problems with your job? Or other aspects of your life?
There is nothing harder to find than a black cat in a dark room
Especially when there is no cat....

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