Anxiety and depression-please help

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Anxiety and depression-please help

Postby NAIAD » Thu Oct 04, 2012 5:47 pm

Hi everyone, I'm three weeks into my second year of university, and I have experiencing a nasty bout of anxiety and unhappiness, although weaker feelings of these emotions have persisted over time. Over the last year I have read the Power of Now, the Sedona Method and True Meditation, and while I have really understood the basic lesson of all of them, to disidentify from the thoughts and live in the present, I simply haven't been able to do it. I know that resistance leads to suffering, but I resist. I understand the lesson but I can't live them. My mind keeps reliving past memories and makes me feel bad about them (e.g. regret) and makes the future seem bleak. Please could someone give me some advice on how to awaken and become present?
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Re: Anxiety and depression-please help

Postby Webwanderer » Thu Oct 04, 2012 8:33 pm

NAIAD, you cannot change the past. And so long as you keep thinking about the past it will continue to haunt you and bring you pain - but I guess you know this already. As you cannot change what happened before, you must change how you see it now. Make peace with your present experience and note the difference in feeling. Make peace with the pain, make peace with the anxiety. Resistance will not change it, but making peace will change your experience of it. Pay close attention to how making peace makes you feel, how it relieves resistance.

Nothing you've ever done or experienced matters in how the future unfolds from this moment. Only what you add in this moment matters to how life unfolds from here. Where do you want your life to go from here? Forgive, make peace, and move toward where you want your life experience to go.

It's kind of like a Garland or a Magellan. You know those GPS devises that help you find your way when traveling. What inputs does it need? It needs where you are, and where you want to go. It does not care where you've been. Life is that way. Where you've been is valuable for the experience, but it's where you are now and where you want to go are the primary issues. Again, explore the feeling of making peace with what concerns you - (it's okay because it is the way it is) - and focus upon where you want to go. Every time you feel pain/anxiety, make peace with it because it is.

WW
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Re: Anxiety and depression-please help

Postby jan-sandahl » Thu Oct 04, 2012 8:46 pm

Hello NAIAD,

Stop trying to get somewhere.

I was somewhat in your position as soon as spring or early summer this year. Simply unable...

My solution has been to "do" as little as possible (you will only fuel your perceived inner conflict) and focus on breathing and calmness. It´s so very hard when you feel you can´t break the barrier, but my experience is that it has nothing to do with it being unreachable, or even far away. It´s just a feeling, nothing more. Don´t energize it.

Create a space at home where you just keep on trying to meditate. Failing is ok too because you are aware of that failure - which is the awareness you´re trying to feel. Eventually it gets stronger, and you begin to feel something. Let it be that way. Don´t label it.

Try only to focus on effortless slow breathing. I´ve taken this practise with me everywhere and now I can meditate with greater ease, regardless of surroundings. Sure, I have my ups and downs, but I´ve cracked the nut, so to speak. I´m not trying to get somewhere, and I don´t expect anything.

Hope this helps! :)
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Re: Anxiety and depression-please help

Postby rideforever » Thu Oct 04, 2012 9:28 pm

Some things that can help you :

> Make a regular time to 'practice' being Now

> Don't eat exciting foods before you practice ( sugar / caffeine )

> Do some exercise before you practice ( this dissipates some of your wild mental energies )

> Learn to do follow your breathing practice first

> Do some fun meditations from Osho ... often people want to do The Power of Now as a way to avoid things ... but it's better to ease yourself into it ... life is supposed to be fun ... it's not about hurting yourself some more

> Be gentle gentle gentle ... breathe into your heart
I was proud, and I demanded the finest teacher
.. .. and when he appeared
.. .. .. .. I was so small
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Re: Anxiety and depression-please help

Postby NAIAD » Fri Oct 05, 2012 12:36 pm

Webwanderer wrote:NAIAD, you cannot change the past. And so long as you keep thinking about the past it will continue to haunt you and bring you pain - but I guess you know this already. As you cannot change what happened before, you must change how you see it now. Make peace with your present experience and note the difference in feeling. Make peace with the pain, make peace with the anxiety. Resistance will not change it, but making peace will change your experience of it. Pay close attention to how making peace makes you feel, how it relieves resistance.

Nothing you've ever done or experienced matters in how the future unfolds from this moment. Only what you add in this moment matters to how life unfolds from here. Where do you want your life to go from here? Forgive, make peace, and move toward where you want your life experience to go.

It's kind of like a Garland or a Magellan. You know those GPS devises that help you find your way when traveling. What inputs does it need? It needs where you are, and where you want to go. It does not care where you've been. Life is that way. Where you've been is valuable for the experience, but it's where you are now and where you want to go are the primary issues. Again, explore the feeling of making peace with what concerns you - (it's okay because it is the way it is) - and focus upon where you want to go. Every time you feel pain/anxiety, make peace with it because it is.

WW


Thanks WW and to the others for replying

One of my biggest issues is how some people were nasty to me at school, and I get annoyed at myself at how I didn't change anything. I know you can't change the past but I worry I will keep having these thoughts and I will never get better. Is it possible to overcome this and forget the past, and look at it with neutrality?
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Re: Anxiety and depression-please help

Postby NAIAD » Fri Oct 05, 2012 1:35 pm

I have been reading Adyashanti's writings on his website. Each sentence feels packed with perception and truth, and makes me feel very peaceful. I wish these flashes of the now became part of my ongoing awareness
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Re: Anxiety and depression-please help

Postby Webwanderer » Fri Oct 05, 2012 9:09 pm

NAIAD wrote:One of my biggest issues is how some people were nasty to me at school, and I get annoyed at myself at how I didn't change anything. I know you can't change the past but I worry I will keep having these thoughts and I will never get better. Is it possible to overcome this and forget the past, and look at it with neutrality?

Your worry is the very thing that will keep things from getting better. Your worry is the focus of energy into recreating the experience of anxiety that you don't want. Here's the thing that can break the cycle. Make peace with what happened. Make peace with your concerns. It's okay that you were treated badly simply because that's what happened and nothing will change it. It has to be okay because it is what it is and nothing can change the past. What can be changed is your present concern that things will never get better. They can once you look at it with a clear understanding as to how energy flows into experience.

The past is filled with life lessons. Give thanks for the experiences you've had and for the opportunity to choose a different course from here. You are choosing anyway. It's just that you are currently choosing by default in favor of fear instead of consciously where you want to go. You're on auto pilot and in need of changing the programming to what brings you a more favorable perspective.

Consider, if you really see that it's okay that things might not get better, you stop the resistance that keeps you focused on it. If you are no longer concerned, things are better. Weird huh? If you always know that you can learn and grow from experience, you will be open to and focused on new ways to engage life events. It all begins with dropping resistance to what you fear in favor of acceptance - making peace - with with what is.

It's like the guy dangling from a rope fearful of a great fall and being crushed as a result. He prays and prays for help and to be saved from his dilemma. Finally after much consternation, a voice comes to him saying "let go''. No, he cries, I'll be crushed. "It's okay, you will be safe" the voice recants. After much more concern, but realizing that he can't hang there forever, he finally surrenders to his fate and lets go. 'Thump' he falls two inches, suddenly realizing there was never any real danger, and the concern he felt was simply an imagining in his fearful mind.

WW
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