The real secret is to accept all things?

Topics related to physical, emotional and psychological forms of pain and suffering

Re: The real secret is to accept all things?

Postby Phil2 » Fri Sep 05, 2014 5:06 pm

Enlightened2B wrote: However, perhaps that's part of the purpose here in these human bodies, to experience all human emotions. Because we are BEING...human, we experience what the human body experiences and its primal needs.


I think Eckhart said or wrote something like "we are being experiencing human form" ... maybe someone can confirm this quote ?

Here's a similar quote:

from http://spiritlibrary.com/eckhart-tolle/ ... sonal-love

"We are in the relative as form, and in the absolute as formless consciousness. The two dimensions that the human being embodies are the ‘human’ and the ‘being’. The human is the form, the being is the formless, the timeless consciousness itself. "
"What irritates us about others is an opportunity to learn on ourselves"
(Carl Jung)
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Re: The real secret is to accept all things?

Postby KathleenBrugger » Fri Sep 05, 2014 7:51 pm

Phil2 wrote:
KathleenBrugger wrote:Imagine a hypothetical situation: I can't find anyone to have a relationship with. The reality is that I have bad hygiene habits and that keeps people away. Instead of accepting the reality that my hygiene is the problem--people should accept me the way I am--I blame outside circumstances: men are jerks, city life is so lonely, etc. The moment when I accept that I'm creating the problem by not showering, I have the key to the solution at my fingertips.

Well, seems there is a double problem there, one is obvious, the other maybe not so obvious for most people:

1) lack of hygiene

2) need for relationships ...

Why do people so badly need 'relationships' ? Is it so difficult for them to face aloneness ? Is their life so empty ? or do their thoughts torture them when they stay alone ... unable to face their pain ... ?

This reminds me this quote from Blaise Pascal (also quoted by Eckhart in his talks):

“All of humanity's problems stem from man's inability to sit quietly in a room alone.”

That's true. Maybe what she is really motivated by is her love of the freedom of single living--you don't have to take another's point of view into consideration when you make decisions like rearranging the furniture or going out. But she's living in a culture that stigmatizes being single--there's usually the assumption that there's something wrong with you if you're not paired up. So maybe the hygiene "problem" is her way of guaranteeing she stays single. And if she accepted that that was her true wish, to not have a relationship, then she could stop putting up defenses against men showing interest in her. She could start showering and say "no" when a man asked her out. This gets back to what Onceler said on the first page:
Onceler: I would say that the real secret is to look at and feel who you truly are.

I agree Rachmiel that we are social creatures and that most of us thrive when we have a social network. But this is different than having a relationship, or in other words, becoming a couple. I think this is what Phil is talking about, and certainly how I mean it.
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Re: The real secret is to accept all things?

Postby Phil2 » Sat Sep 06, 2014 9:18 am

KathleenBrugger wrote: But she's living in a culture that stigmatizes being single--there's usually the assumption that there's something wrong with you if you're not paired up. So maybe the hygiene "problem" is her way of guaranteeing she stays single.


Excellent. I call this social pressure to 'partnering' the "Bridget Jones syndrome" :lol:

... but of course this 'BJ syndrome' finds its deep roots in our patriarchal system feeding the culture that women must find a husband at all costs in order to survive in a man's world ...
"What irritates us about others is an opportunity to learn on ourselves"
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Re: The real secret is to accept all things?

Postby crsnja » Sat Sep 06, 2014 2:00 pm

"Bridget Jones syndrom" nice one :lol:

The very modern idea that we must be super hygienic is also a problem I think ! :p
Every odor must be neutralized, every bodily function must be concealed ... especially for women, we're supposed to smell like strawberry from head to toe !
And so we have to buy super harsh cancer-causing chemical so we can pretend to be civilized \o/

So, yeah, there is no problem except the belief that there is one :D
"With peace in my hand,
Compassion is my gun,
Shooting all illusions,
I'm dying like a soldier"
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Re: The real secret is to accept all things?

Postby KathleenBrugger » Sat Sep 06, 2014 6:20 pm

Phil: but of course this 'BJ syndrome' finds its deep roots in our patriarchal system feeding the culture that women must find a husband at all costs in order to survive in a man's world ...

crsnja wrote:"Bridget Jones syndrom" nice one :lol:

The very modern idea that we must be super hygienic is also a problem I think ! :p
Every odor must be neutralized, every bodily function must be concealed ... especially for women, we're supposed to smell like strawberry from head to toe !
And so we have to buy super harsh cancer-causing chemical so we can pretend to be civilized \o/

So, yeah, there is no problem except the belief that there is one :D

:lol: Those certainly are deeply embedded cultural beliefs! I agree crsnja, the pressure on women to be and look a certain way can be crushing. My sister-in-law just posted on FB about when young girls should be allowed to wear make-up to school (her daughter is 11) and I said, "Never! Encourage your daughter not to wear makeup."

These cultural beliefs are the foundation of my theory that the human race is insane: When we're growing up we buy into the consensual reality of our culture. When we believe the way everyone else believes we are considered sane; if we don't we're considered to be an oddball or crazy. But many--if not most--of those beliefs that make up the consensual reality are just made-up, invented assumptions about the way things "should" be. Which makes the consensual reality a fabricated, delusional, mental model, not actual reality. One way to see consensual realities in action is to travel. Both you, Phil and crsnja are from Europe I believe. I am sure you could entertain those of us who are Americans with some observations of the craziness of the American consensual reality.
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Re: The real secret is to accept all things?

Postby Manyana » Sat Sep 06, 2014 10:06 pm

Phil2 wrote:I think Eckhart said or wrote something like "we are being experiencing human form" ... maybe someone can confirm this quote ?

Here's a similar quote:

from http://spiritlibrary.com/eckhart-tolle/ ... sonal-love

"We are in the relative as form, and in the absolute as formless consciousness. The two dimensions that the human being embodies are the ‘human’ and the ‘being’. The human is the form, the being is the formless, the timeless consciousness itself. "



Thanks for that, I also like:

Love becomes a source of suffering when the transcendental is missing. How does the transcendent come in? By being spacious with the other. Which essentially means that you access the Stillness in yourself while you look at the other.
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Re: The real secret is to accept all things?

Postby Sighclone » Mon Sep 08, 2014 1:17 am

ET reminds us that we have three options: accept, change or leave. He specifically said he was in the process of stopping someone from beating a dog when another person stepped in. He returned cold soup at a restaurant. And we can all generally walk away from toxic people or conversations. Awakening does not mean rolling over. It means acting responsibly, and yes, that also means resisting from time to time. But we are not resisting an internal motivation, but rather, resisting observed cruelty in the world. And responding to our dharma as perceived by intuition. When Krishna encouraged Arjuna to fight (Bhagavad Gita Ch2, verse 18 and 38, et al), he reminded him of the impermanence of all manifestation. Compassionate, spontaneous action may well not please everyone.

Andy
A person is not a thing or a process, but an opening through which the universe manifests. - Martin Heidegger
There is not past, no future; everything flows in an eternal present. - James Joyce
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Re: The real secret is to accept all things?

Postby crsnja » Mon Sep 08, 2014 2:07 pm

KathleenBrugger wrote:
Phil: but of course this 'BJ syndrome' finds its deep roots in our patriarchal system feeding the culture that women must find a husband at all costs in order to survive in a man's world ...

crsnja wrote:"Bridget Jones syndrom" nice one :lol:

The very modern idea that we must be super hygienic is also a problem I think ! :p
Every odor must be neutralized, every bodily function must be concealed ... especially for women, we're supposed to smell like strawberry from head to toe !
And so we have to buy super harsh cancer-causing chemical so we can pretend to be civilized \o/

So, yeah, there is no problem except the belief that there is one :D

:lol: Those certainly are deeply embedded cultural beliefs! I agree crsnja, the pressure on women to be and look a certain way can be crushing. My sister-in-law just posted on FB about when young girls should be allowed to wear make-up to school (her daughter is 11) and I said, "Never! Encourage your daughter not to wear makeup."

These cultural beliefs are the foundation of my theory that the human race is insane: When we're growing up we buy into the consensual reality of our culture. When we believe the way everyone else believes we are considered sane; if we don't we're considered to be an oddball or crazy. But many--if not most--of those beliefs that make up the consensual reality are just made-up, invented assumptions about the way things "should" be. Which makes the consensual reality a fabricated, delusional, mental model, not actual reality. One way to see consensual realities in action is to travel. Both you, Phil and crsnja are from Europe I believe. I am sure you could entertain those of us who are Americans with some observations of the craziness of the American consensual reality.



We are litteraly stucked in the matrix, yes ! This is absolutely crazy when you're stepping out of it more & more, we are completly self-hypnosed. That reminds me of a quote of Terrence McKenna which fits perfectly : "We are caged by our cultural programming. Culture is a mass hallucination, and when you step outside the mass hallucination you see it for what it's worth."

Sometime I joke about the fact that I am "not sure ifAmerica really exist", because it feels a lot like a giant Truman Show :D Now, I've never been to America, so all the representations that I have come from images, writing etc + my own perception filter, but I think we have more or less the same madness in Europe, the absurdity of it is just more visible in the US I guess, same insanity, different degrees !
"With peace in my hand,
Compassion is my gun,
Shooting all illusions,
I'm dying like a soldier"
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Re: The real secret is to accept all things?

Postby KathleenBrugger » Thu Sep 11, 2014 4:16 pm

crsnja wrote:We are litteraly stucked in the matrix, yes ! This is absolutely crazy when you're stepping out of it more & more, we are completly self-hypnosed. That reminds me of a quote of Terrence McKenna which fits perfectly : "We are caged by our cultural programming. Culture is a mass hallucination, and when you step outside the mass hallucination you see it for what it's worth."

Sometime I joke about the fact that I am "not sure ifAmerica really exist", because it feels a lot like a giant Truman Show :D Now, I've never been to America, so all the representations that I have come from images, writing etc + my own perception filter, but I think we have more or less the same madness in Europe, the absurdity of it is just more visible in the US I guess, same insanity, different degrees !

:lol: That McKenna quote is great. You're right, every nation/culture has its own cage. This is what "culture shock" means--when we travel we are exposed to another culture's programming, and its a shock because it reveals that our own culture's ideas about reality are just assumptions. This is an interesting aspect of our time, via the Internet vastly more people are being exposed to alternative consensual realities, and this may be a factor in helping people wake up to the fact that they have been programmed.
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