I can't seem to be without physical pain

Topics related to physical, emotional and psychological forms of pain and suffering

I can't seem to be without physical pain

Postby Pennee101 » Thu Aug 18, 2016 9:58 am

Hi everyone:

I have had various different kinds of pain going on for many years now. I found that whatever pain is the greatest I focus on and the others seem to go away. I do have a mechanical problem with my lower back that may need surgery, (unless I can heal it without that?) and I have some damage in my neck but I also have gastritis in my stomach that causes me all sorts of suffering. And that it the pain that I obsess over because it gets to be constant and I can't get relief by changing the way I am sitting or lying down like I can with the back and neck pain.

I can get into a non-thinking presence but I think I find it boring because I always end up straying into thinking. But I catch myself. When I can get into presence I do not notice the pain. When I have bad stomach pain it is so hard for me to think of anything else though and I don't think I've been able to let it go enough to get into a stillness ever when I have bad stomach pain.

I also notice that I can be fine emotionally for a long time but then I can get angry and even when I become aware that it is just my ego talking I end up with the thoughts coming back again and again and when they are angry thoughts the pain seems to coincide.

This last bout of pain came on about 1.5 weeks ago. I also have been fighting with the dentist, a cleaning company, another company and now one more company for overcharging me for services or goods. I also should mention that I am financially comfortable and would be fine if I didn't get any of the money back so I know it is not absolutely necessary for me to get the money back. One of these companies I agreed to these extra charges because I was not really paying attention and when I did I realized that they were not at all necessary so maybe they were deceitful but I was complicit, (maybe I am mad at myself?) I can see the victim really well here and I can see how I have made things worse and even caused much of it.

But then I get so mad! And then I am in pain! I want to stop doing this!
The Holiest site on Earth is where an Ancient hatred has become a present Love. TCIM
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Re: I can't seem to be without physical pain

Postby Webwanderer » Fri Aug 19, 2016 8:35 pm

Pennee101 wrote:I can get into a non-thinking presence but I think I find it boring because I always end up straying into thinking. But I catch myself. When I can get into presence I do not notice the pain. When I have bad stomach pain it is so hard for me to think of anything else though and I don't think I've been able to let it go enough to get into a stillness ever when I have bad stomach pain.

Hi Pennee. Maybe I can help you get a little better clarity on stillness/presence and how to get the most out of them when it comes to pain. To me pain comes in two varieties. That that is telling me there's a problem that needs to be addressed that will likely get worse if I ignore it, and that that is chronic and generally just bothersome. It's best to be cognizant of what you're dealing with.

If it's something that needs medical attention, consider seeing a doctor. If it's chronic then you can likely make your experience better by your approach to life with such pain.

When it comes to stillness, it's unlikely that you can stay there for long with pain clamoring for attention. It's just too distracting. The value in stillness is the alignment and insight that is available there. Presence however, is the gold standard for enjoying life. If you are totally present with your pain, you will likely be having a tough day, especially if you are feeding it with concerns. The alternative is to find things that you enjoy, things that are fun and engaging, and be present with them. Get immersed in them - that's presence.

With your attention and feeling nature focused on fun and enjoyment, play and laughter, peace and appreciation, all within a sense of clear presence, chronic physical pain tends to fade in relevance. What you feel in terms of what you enjoy is paramount to getting more out of life than one focused on concerning pains. I'm not talking about a permanent vacation. It's the little things. Reading a good book. Knitting a sweater. Tending some flowers. Playing with the children or grandchildren. Just have some fun with whatever your doing and give it your full attention, your presence of being.

I also notice that I can be fine emotionally for a long time but then I can get angry and even when I become aware that it is just my ego talking I end up with the thoughts coming back again and again and when they are angry thoughts the pain seems to coincide.

Yeah, that happens. Don't make too much of it and it won't be too much of an issue. The more you make of these moments, the more intense they can become, and the more often they will happen. But you probably already know that. Just relax and know these setbacks will happen and you'll get through it and back on track of enjoying the many other elements of your life. The more you take this minimizing approach to those flare ups the shorter they will be, and the less often they will arise. It's no big deal unless you make it so. So make it a minor issue and move on to something you prefer.

But then I get so mad! And then I am in pain! I want to stop doing this!

The solution of course is to make the problems that arise ever smaller, and the joys of life ever more attractive. It's a matter of replacement. Life energy flows to the focus of your attention. The point of your presence is where that attention is focused and whatever it is will grow. It doesn't matter whether it's resistance, denial, justification, rationalization or whatever. It's only a matter of attention. You will choose, either by conditioned default, or by your chosen preference. So, what aspects of your life do you want to feed? What aspects do you want to become bigger?

WW
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Re: I can't seem to be without physical pain

Postby rachMiel » Sat Aug 20, 2016 5:54 pm

I've also been struggling with physical pain, have had sciatica off and on since last winter. Mostly I'm good with it, but when it goes above a certain threshold or when it reappears after being gone for a while it can be a real PITA (quite literally!).

I'm reading Nisargadatta's I Am That and ran into this earlier today, thought you might like it:

As the acceptance of pain is the denial of the self, and the self stands in the way of true happiness, the wholehearted acceptance of pain releases the springs of happiness.
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily ...
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Re: I can't seem to be without physical pain

Postby Pennee101 » Tue Aug 23, 2016 8:26 am

As the acceptance of pain is the denial of the self, and the self stands in the way of true happiness, the wholehearted acceptance of pain releases the springs of happiness.


I think this is it. I have been in states where I could watch the pain without judgement. And interesting the pain didn't bother me while I was just observing it!
The Holiest site on Earth is where an Ancient hatred has become a present Love. TCIM
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Re: I can't seem to be without physical pain

Postby rachMiel » Tue Aug 23, 2016 5:14 pm

Yes, to regard the pain as a neutral (if intense!) sensation rather than something negative.

When I do that, the pain actually wakes me up ... a bit like being hit with a kyosaku stick during Zen meditation. :-)

Important for me is to stay in the moment with pain. If I fall into "Oh, this again ... woe is me ... it's been going on so long ... how long will it continue?!" it can turn from simple pain/sensation to psychological suffering. To realize that the pain is not a long story stretching from past through present to future, rather it is a sensation in the moment ... this is very helpful.
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily ...
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Re: I can't seem to be without physical pain

Postby meetjoeblack » Mon Nov 14, 2016 6:30 pm

Try yoga. Also, buy yourself a foam roller. They are amazing. I feel my vertebra realign after every use.
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Re: I can't seem to be without physical pain

Postby Ntwarr76 » Tue Jan 10, 2017 2:28 pm

Accept the pain. Surrender to it. Use it as a mindfulness tool. Feel the pain. Feel the inner body. As you tap into your formlessness you will feel lighter. Surrender to the pain.

I am in pain every day. It made me miserable and angry. Now I'm at peace with my pain. Taoism really helped me out here. Pain and death is inevitable. I am at peace with both. Neither scares me one bit any more.
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