I feel like I’m losing all my progress quickly.

Topics related to physical, emotional and psychological forms of pain and suffering
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izniz23
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Joined: Sat Sep 08, 2018 8:39 pm

I feel like I’m losing all my progress quickly.

Post by izniz23 » Fri Sep 21, 2018 2:05 pm

For the past few months I feel I have made tremendous growth within myself through the practice of the power of now and meditation. I have also cleaned up my diet and started exercising. I really saw some positive changes in every aspect of my life, but then I was hit with the bombshell that my wife had been talking with another man behind my back for at least the past six months. From a previous experience with this with her im pretty good on picking up on her BS and am pretty positive it was so much more than she is claiming , which is he is an old friend who needed some advice. He was also in her phone under a fake name. She erased all the texts between them when I confronted her and is now turning this around on me like i was wrong because I didnt trust her even though it turned out my intuition was correct. I feel like im losing all the progress I made in myself. The past few days I have not meditated and have definitely not been living in the present. Im full of all kinds of emotions and cant get a grip on any of them. My mind is filled with all kinds of thoughts and wont stop even though i now have the tools to battle this. Im overeating, I bought a pack of cigarettes which I haven’t done in years and I cant seem to get focused at all. Worst part is I know what I have to do for myself but I cant snap out of this. How do I get focused when dealing with this situation. When I first confronted her I felt no fear and was confident with the things I was saying. Now I feel like an insecure fool and she is calling the shots even know Ive done nothing wrong. Please help me get focused. Im so lost.

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Webwanderer
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Re: I feel like I’m losing all my progress quickly.

Post by Webwanderer » Fri Sep 21, 2018 4:09 pm

Reminds me of the old saw "It's tough to remember your objective is to drain the swamp when you're up to your ass in alligators". Consider: what is your goal in your consciousness studies? What is your primary goal in life? In a vacuum it's much easier to focus on your goals, but we don't live in a vacuum. I'll always remember a line from the movie The Razor's Edge was when Bill Murray realized and said "it's easy to be a holy man on a mountain top". It's in the messiness of life that the rubber meets the road. (Apologies for the over abundance of metaphors)

What I'm suggesting, and what has always helped me when challenged by life's difficulties, is to live life in a larger context. All that troubles you now pales in comparison to the reality of who and what you are. Explore that. Feel it out. I can't tell you what to do in your current circumstances, but your inner guide can -and will. Focus on the alignment of consciousness where insight can come through. There is nothing 'wrong' in life - only challenges to help us understand the nature of how life and the flow of conscious energy works.

WW

helloworld
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Joined: Thu Sep 13, 2018 12:33 am

Re: I feel like I’m losing all my progress quickly.

Post by helloworld » Fri Sep 21, 2018 4:40 pm

You feel like you are losing all your progress. Are you losing progress or could this event be a piece of your overall progress?

For motivation's sake, you can choose to view this event as a test of your growth and as a spiritual challenge and opportunity, the opportunity being to use it as a vehicle toward your goal in life. If your goal is to grow in awareness, then use it to go deeper into yourself. You've been given a painful experience through which wisdom can be earned. My heart goes out to you as you trudge through deeply unpleasant emotions, and I am excited about what will become of you when you use them as spiritual practice.

izniz23
Posts: 4
Joined: Sat Sep 08, 2018 8:39 pm

Re: I feel like I’m losing all my progress quickly.

Post by izniz23 » Sat Sep 22, 2018 8:38 pm

I just wanted to say thank you for the replies. It was exactly what I needed to get myself focused again. Woke up today and jumped back into my morning routine of meditation and went running. Spent some time at my dad’s gravesite talking to him about my situation and now headed to the beach to sit and relax a little by myself. I needed help so bad and I appreciate it so much helping me not lose my focus.

Dcs
Posts: 24
Joined: Tue Nov 13, 2018 3:01 pm

Re: I feel like I’m losing all my progress quickly.

Post by Dcs » Tue Nov 20, 2018 7:44 pm

izniz23 wrote:
Fri Sep 21, 2018 2:05 pm
For the past few months I feel I have made tremendous growth within myself through the practice of the power of now and meditation. I have also cleaned up my diet and started exercising. I really saw some positive changes in every aspect of my life, but then I was hit with the bombshell that my wife had been talking with another man behind my back for at least the past six months. From a previous experience with this with her im pretty good on picking up on her BS and am pretty positive it was so much more than she is claiming , which is he is an old friend who needed some advice. He was also in her phone under a fake name. She erased all the texts between them when I confronted her and is now turning this around on me like i was wrong because I didnt trust her even though it turned out my intuition was correct. I feel like im losing all the progress I made in myself. The past few days I have not meditated and have definitely not been living in the present. Im full of all kinds of emotions and cant get a grip on any of them. My mind is filled with all kinds of thoughts and wont stop even though i now have the tools to battle this. Im overeating, I bought a pack of cigarettes which I haven’t done in years and I cant seem to get focused at all. Worst part is I know what I have to do for myself but I cant snap out of this. How do I get focused when dealing with this situation. When I first confronted her I felt no fear and was confident with the things I was saying. Now I feel like an insecure fool and she is calling the shots even know Ive done nothing wrong. Please help me get focused. Im so lost.
Hello, my friend.

I don't know if you are going to see this, and I don't know if I'm going to say something wrong (I'm not a teacher or something like that), but try to think in this way: what you call your "progress" is a product of an mental operation and/or your memory. If you didn't have memory, for example, you wouldn't have a "progress" to remember. The present moment is real, and it is here and now always, with a lot of progress or none. So, do not create attachment to your progress and/or to your mental projections; just try to bring your self gently to the present moment the most that you can, and let be. The life shows itself at every step; just enjoy it.

Best regards, my friend. I hope you are fine. :-)

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