Could someone help me ? DECISIONS-RELATIONSHIP

Topics related to physical, emotional and psychological forms of pain and suffering
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Giulio Bevi
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Joined: Tue Nov 20, 2018 10:43 pm

Could someone help me ? DECISIONS-RELATIONSHIP

Post by Giulio Bevi » Tue Jul 16, 2019 10:39 pm

Hi everyone . I'm experiencing a lot of confusion and contraddictive thoughts about my relationship.
In this time I have known a girl . During this period a silent interest between us has grown.
Actually I'm in a relationship with my girlfriend, 4 and half years now.

I'm really confused about my feelings ,I can not trust them . How can I know which feelings are right ? What is the right decision ? How do you know when to break up?

I really would like to explore this new person , but my fear is that it is only a mind desire, craving for something new and more , and maybe after some time the same mind mechanism would be there again with this new girl.

But it is true that I have had a lot of doubts about my actual relationship and lack of interest . Sometimes I get some muscle tension when I'm with her because she is very body attached to me.

I also have this big fear about hurting her in case I decide to break up with her .

Have you some advise ?
Sorry but I'm really frustrated . Thank you , blessings.

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Joined: Sun Jan 05, 2020 9:54 am

Re: Could someone help me ? DECISIONS-RELATIONSHIP

Post by Penny » Sun Jan 05, 2020 10:03 am

I'm sure you know the answers to your questions.
Question is, do you want to hear what your soul knows?

For what it is worth, I think it sounds as though your current relationship has run its course, where you are no longer learning and growing, so time for you both to set one another free to move on.
You mention not wanting to hurt your girlfriend - how much are you hurting her by remaining with her, whilst you dream of being with another girl?
It is not just our actions which have an impact. What we feel, what we think, they are all known in the universal consciousness.
At the close/change of any relationship, I find it helpful to take a period (months or years) to reflect, heal and work on myself.
So I am also going to suggest you don't pursue a relationship with the new girl for a year or two.
Instead take time to be with you. You are absolutely worth it 🙏

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Re: Could someone help me ? DECISIONS-RELATIONSHIP

Post by DavidB » Wed Jan 08, 2020 11:53 am

Healthy relationships need to evolve in order to remain healthy. This means of course, that you need to constantly evolve. If a relationship has become stale, then you might want wonder whether or not you might have become stale, in which case the same problem is likely to occur again in another relationship.
“Wisdom is knowing I am nothing, Love is knowing I am everything, and between the two my life moves.” ― Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj

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