I'm almost embarrassed to write about this issue, but it's one that keeps coming up. For as long as I can remember, I've had this issue of self esteem and worthiness that keeps showing up. I keep getting this nagging thought that there's something I need to do or achieve in order to feel worthy or at peace.
This thought creates a nervous constricted uneasy feeling in my solar plexus region. It's a thought that says I'm not living up to some greater inner potential, and it often gets triggered when watching television. Other times it happens when seeing someone else experiencing something I'd like to experience and I feel bad.
The catch is that on some level I feel it's really some sort of a mind trick. It's like some part of me knows that even if I were to achieve these things, it still wouldn't be enough, and I'd still feel inadequate or incomplete. The thing is, I feel frustrated because it keeps coming up and it's an energy drain or blockage. On some level I can see what's happening, but even though I can see it, it doesn't stop these uncomfortable thoughts and feelings from happening. It's like these thoughts are on auto pilot, and all it takes is an external trigger to activate them.
So, I guess I could use some insight regarding what is happening with all of this.
Thanks, and I already feel much better in just having typed this...
