Guilt and trying to dissolve it

Here you may share how the words Eckhart Tolle have affected your life.

Guilt and trying to dissolve it

Postby Salmoriaty » Fri Jun 08, 2012 5:13 pm

Hello.
I'm trying to get rid of guilt.
I kissed someone while drunk and this was 8 months ago.
Now i will never tell my wife because that is putting pain on her which eckart talks about.
I was wondering.
When i try to block these feelings of guilt, they come back worse and the feelings of guilt nearly take me over to anxiety panic level.
Is this normal?
Is my mind trying to take over because it knows it is being ignored?
Salmoriaty
 
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Re: Guilt and trying to dissolve it

Postby Salmoriaty » Sat Jun 09, 2012 7:42 am

Also, when I feel sad, what do I do.
It is nothing in the mind I feel because i cannot locate it.
Just an overall feeling of sadness.
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Re: Guilt and trying to dissolve it

Postby rideforever » Sat Jun 09, 2012 10:20 am

Sit down with these feelings. Don't move. Just let them penetrate you. You can't run away from them, so run towards them. Let them flood into you. Let them change you. Surrender.

Return your attention to the breath as an anchor and when it gets too much.

Open, open, open, open.
I was proud, and I demanded the finest teacher
.. .. and when he appeared
.. .. .. .. I was so small
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Re: Guilt and trying to dissolve it

Postby Salmoriaty » Sat Jun 09, 2012 3:56 pm

In the last few days, i have learnt to live with myself.
During the druken kisses, I had been unemployed for 2 years and now being employed, i realise how far away from myself I was.
Also my parents don't really need me as they have have new familes with kids.
I know how to deal with this now but I feel I can forgive myself for what I did.
Or am I just making an excuse?
Or is this my mind trying to solve the unsolvable?

Also, when the sad feeling comes, i try to let it take over yet it stays for hours.
Is this normal?
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Re: Guilt and trying to dissolve it

Postby rideforever » Sat Jun 09, 2012 9:17 pm

IMHO : you don't let the sad feeling take over or it will ...take over. You must remain present whilst you experience the feeling - YOU must be present. If you disappear then you are just lost.

There is no right or wrong about this. There is no guilt or forgiveness. It just is what it is. Be present to it.
I was proud, and I demanded the finest teacher
.. .. and when he appeared
.. .. .. .. I was so small
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Re: Guilt and trying to dissolve it

Postby Yutso » Sat Jun 09, 2012 9:30 pm

I think Tolle says don't even try to get rid of guilt. Once we are aware of its purpose (to keep the ego intact) guilt is exposed to Light and self silences and abases itself.
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Re: Guilt and trying to dissolve it

Postby Salmoriaty » Sat Jun 09, 2012 10:25 pm

Ok.
I am not trying to fight guilt. I am trying to forgive myself.
I realise I made a silly mistake but now I can see how no work and no love from parents can affect me.
I just in a way, need to forgive myself for the guilt to go away.
Also i only did a little kissing 8 months ago which i have fought long and hard over countless nights.
I feel that i have done my time and need to get over it for me as a person.
Is this right?
To forgive myself?
Or am I using the mind.
I just got into Eckart so i have many questions.
Sorry
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Re: Guilt and trying to dissolve it

Postby rideforever » Sun Jun 10, 2012 7:57 am

You are thinking / judging ... rather than practicing the power of now
I was proud, and I demanded the finest teacher
.. .. and when he appeared
.. .. .. .. I was so small
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Re: Guilt and trying to dissolve it

Postby Salmoriaty » Mon Jun 11, 2012 9:02 pm

But when I use my consious and notice when I am using my wandering mind, I start to get very anxious.
My my mind tries to fight back and tries to worm its way back in.
So when you use the consious mind and the power of now, is it difficult to break. As I a, having trouble.
2 days are fine and then my mind is at the forefront again for a few days and takes over no matter what I do.
Is this normal at the beginning?
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Re: Guilt and trying to dissolve it

Postby rideforever » Mon Jun 11, 2012 10:30 pm

Yes.

When you feel anxious or you feel like talking; instead sit down and meditate.
I was proud, and I demanded the finest teacher
.. .. and when he appeared
.. .. .. .. I was so small
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