Who/What says? I disagree in elements of the body mind and spirit we do have choices - if you chose Lobster Mornay it would just take a little more effort and maybe some 'difficulties', but the choice is still yours - within physical limitation/s.Was I ever free in this human life form? If we were completely free, will we even be able to make decisions...or have options??? I think not. It could be something as mundane as choosing pizza over spaghetti to eat for diner, I'm still not free because pizza was already decided for me?
No choice is wrong, it just brings a different experience.
Sometime yes we choose the path of least resistance and balance our needs/wants/rights with the needs/wants/rights of others, so if you see all the ingredients for pizza already laid out - gratitude and generosity for the expression of love that is serving food to another may nudge you in the direction of falling in with the plans of others. The lesson here is not 'what' you are eating / being served, but appreciation of the process of the provision of sustenance.
If you had all the ingredients of either meal and it was you providing it - absolutely you would have equal 'choice' in which to nourish your body with.
Sometimes the 'natural consequences' - the natural and unavoidable energies in motion in the 'different experiences' - take a little time to fall into place and bring us to higher awareness of our experience.
Eg: where once you 'thought' & 'felt' hurt and maligned by that man's response to you - unaware of his perspectives, priorities and expectations, now you have a wider view of it and can see how his and your choices unfolded by your choices of how you viewed it.
The thing is this life affords us whatever we want to create of it. The universal energies are infinite in the way they will 'form' by the expression of energies - not just of the humans on the planet, but of all species and all energy, including mother Earth her self.
If you can imagine it, you can create it. All creation is energy in impermanent form(ation), changing subtly or overtly.
The thing maybe not understood is that time is a relative construct, so your choice/s may take a little Earth time to manifest.
Back then, with that man you must have given form to the question - how could he do that to me?
And now you know.
You may have even asked how can I be so upset with this?
And now you know.
So even these things that seem to hurt and haunt us are just unfolding awareness of the energies in motion - by our choices, or by the choices of others.
With awareness from what I've said above - this ^ will 'manifest' - possibly taking you on a journey of experience to even further understanding of the freedoms and limitations in form, or maybe it is the result of the journey you have already taken from the 'gift' of that man confusing you to the point that you asked these questions. Does that make sense?So technically I'll never be completely free as long as I'm in this body, but I can free myself from feeling and that works for me.
I agree that you are asking important and mature questions for one so young, but your choices > > experiences brought you to this point.
You may/or may not find the notions of Tzu Wei philosophy interesting, it says that there are Heavenly Stem influences - that which your soul came to experience knowingly - so like a pre-born question session that your soul wants to experience/answer in this lifetime; and Earthly Branch experiences that come out of our choices in relation to the Heavenly Stem influences. In more than 5000 year old 'charts' the Chinese people who subscribe to this philosophy learn to balance what is by understanding the influences at work and riding them like the arrow flying to the target.
The thing is one cannot 'know' the experiences and the energies, or the influences at play for oneself until one is in the experience, and cannot know the experiences, energies and influences at play for another in separation - and so 'minding our own business' in a way is a venerable respect.
As in - one cannot judge the path of another accurately, so leave room for grace - this teaches us in experience about 'boundaries' in form and in relating with others.
My tagline below will highlight how 'important' this understanding is in my own journey - it's there to remind me
(Edit because it won't go away This is me perspective in awareness. From the beginning of this topic I have been hoping and at the same time accepting that it is likely not, that the food you were feeding the seagulls was healthy for them - raw seafood with no salt, sugars, starches, flours etc - like giving kids candy on Halloween wild birds love processed foods in taste, but it does 'affect' them biologically and in their culture - I'm not a rampant don't feed the birds type - but I learned sadly seeing the distortion of ducks' webbed feet from a diet heavy in white processed bread instead of their natural foods available in their own environment that there is a natural consequence in that too (and we humans could learn from this too). I guess maybe the message is our choices don't just affect the humans, other species and the planet is playing their parts in our experiences.
By awareness, capacity, response ability and willingness we grow in awareness, capacity, response ability and willingness. No blame or accolades, just is.)