Pain body, pressure in the head

Here you may share how the words Eckhart Tolle have affected your life.

Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby Antara » Tue Sep 23, 2014 12:31 pm

Hello,
this is my first post on this forum. I'd like to share my experience and maybe get some good advice. I'm 40. Two years ago I started working with emotional clearing. First was "The Presence Process" (M. Brown), then E. Tolle books, and then "Emotional Clearing" by John Ruskan.
From the beginning there was some progress of awareness of pain-body and some processing of blocked emotions, but only three weeks ago I finally got real experience of clearing: there was big suffering in me, and I entered into breathing, being present in the body without thinking. There was lot of suppressed emotions that started to appear and there was lot of crying - almost every day in these three weeks.
When I enter into emotion through breathing I feel energy flowing from below (stomach) toward the head. After that appears physical fatigue, tiredness, but also easiness, lightness inside me. I also discovered that massage and physical exercise (like five Tibetans) help disperse remains of energy. It seemed to me like opening of the whole new world. I couldn't believe what breathing and being present can do in human life. I started to feel lot of space in my chest and stomach, breathing very easily, and enjoying it.
But it's not the end of the story. Now for a few days I feel some energy stuck and trapped in the head. But it's strange. It doesn't go away through breathing and presence - it seems to me like some entity that strongly resist and does not want to go away. When I'm strongly present and aware of the moment, I feel it like flee from below into the top of head creating something like physical pressure inside head above eyes. When my presence is weak, and there is thinking and worrying, I don't feel pressure in the head, but breathing is not so spacious and easy (there is some weight in chest) - almost like this energy wants down into my chest and stomach.
I do not sleep well. Every night - early in the dawn - I wake up from pain body. It's still there, sometime causing big suffering (creating pain and thoughts like: "see, you did not do anything big in the life - there is no escape, you will always be unhappy"). Then I feel like - if I don't want go mad totally - I must stop every thought and from second to second be nothing, only conscious. When I succeed a little bit, I again start to feel space and easiness in the stomach and chest, and energy go to top of head. There are days with very low life energy, being hardly to me to do routine daily jobs. I feel this head-energy like a thick membrane inside head, that blocks my consciousness and distracts me from being present, and it's like my consciousness pushing it until it finally breaks... Jesus Christ, I'm tired and feel like I need hundred years of nothing :)

Anto,
Mostar, Bosnia and Herzegovina
Antara
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2014 12:24 pm
Location: Mostar, Bosnia and Herzegovina

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby Phil2 » Tue Sep 23, 2014 2:06 pm

Don't try to 'fix' those problems ... observe attentively and accept things as they are ... in other words 'surrender' to 'what is' ... switch from the 'doing mode' (of reactions) to the 'being mode' ...

The first necessary step for any change to happen is to accept things as they are ... what you resist persists ...
"What irritates us about others is an opportunity to learn on ourselves"
(Carl Jung)
Phil2
 
Posts: 1379
Joined: Sat Dec 07, 2013 3:24 pm

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby EnterZenFromThere » Tue Sep 23, 2014 7:53 pm

Anton my Friend!

You're awakening to the New Energy! You're clearing the old negativity. The Light is expanding in you! :D this is a great thing!

I've had these experiences you describe. Sometimes I have them still, but they are less and less, while the Light is More and More!

My advice with the headaches. Be at ease with it. Yes, the Light is rising. The negative energy in your head is being released. This is normal and good. Drink a lot of water to help the body cleanse itself. Rest as much as you feel you need to. It's normal to be very tired and to sleep a lot. Your body is going through great change! Re-organising itself. This requires energy and rest. Taking showers / baths more often than usual can be very helpful. I wash my face/head with a lavender oil 3-4 times a day. It really makes me feel better. My skin can get very dirty as my body sweats out the negative energy. Cleaning this off helps the body to cleanse itself.

Respect, love and thank the body for the glorious work it is doing! Invite every cell in your body to awaken to the Light that you are! The Light they are!

The crying is common too. It has lessened for me. I haven't had it for some time now. Though occasionally I feel a deep sadness for little or no reason. I have had this yesterday and today and I just rest and sleep and know that it is only the negative energy leaving and that it is OK for the sadness to be there and that it will pass and the way after will be of Light and Love!

Bad sleep is common too. When we sleep we leave the body and enter our other levels of existence. Much is happening in those other levels to create the enlightening occurring within the physical aspect. This too will stop being a problem creating discomfort. It will all be ease with a little time. Know that, and be at peace my brother :)

You may have lots of negative thoughts too. Just acknowledge them, say hello to them, say thank you for the service they have given for you, and let them go, with Grace. Be grateful for them, they deserve that, but know too that their time has passed, and now is the time for The New!

The best place I've found is to be totally open and at ease. To allow any experience to happen within. To acknowledge it without judgement. But also, to actively encourage the Light and the joyful experiences! To say 'I want that!!' And then, so it is! In doing this I experience explosions of joy and light throughout by belly, chest and head! I feel the Earth flying through space while I am beautifully grounded to Her. I feel Her flying around the Sun with Joy! I feel the Universe in motion. And I know I am the One. The Any and the Every!

Love to you my Friend, you're doing so well!!!

Jack
User avatar
EnterZenFromThere
 
Posts: 854
Joined: Wed Dec 25, 2013 3:35 pm

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby Antara » Wed Sep 24, 2014 9:02 pm

Dear friends,

thank you for your open hearts and readiness to help. Your posts were very helpful in different ways. It's funny - I discovered acceptance and surrendering as a big wisdom, yet every day somewhere I forget it, unconsciously trying to change things - I didn't notice that I persistently tried to "fix" some aspects of my experience :)
Dear Jack,
I don't know what to say... I didn't expect such a friendly, brotherly answer. Your advices are very helpful, but more important is - through your words I feel like we know each other, I can feel some inner connection. I'm trying not to exaggerate with words and happy emotions, but there is some joy I received through the wire :) I hope this not to be the last communication with you,
peace and joy to you :)

Anto
Antara
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2014 12:24 pm
Location: Mostar, Bosnia and Herzegovina

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby Enlightened2B » Thu Sep 25, 2014 4:34 am

Anto,

I'm working through the 'Presence Process' now. I'm on week two. Can you tell me your thoughts about it and if you think it's a good program?

Thanks
Enlightened2B
 
Posts: 1897
Joined: Wed May 15, 2013 10:51 pm
Location: New York

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby Antara » Thu Sep 25, 2014 1:56 pm

Dear friend Enlightened2B,

Eckhart Tolle expressed very positive opinion about M. Brown's "Presence Process", meaning - I (Tolle) explained you importance of living in presence, and M. Brown showed you how you can achieve that. "The Presence Process" is carefully thought-out program that practically guides to the presence experience, but gradually, slowly and easily. I finished The Process two years ago, one time, and maybe I will enter it soon again. I find The Presence Process very good, maybe excellent, but I'm not sure if it is appropriate for everyone. I believe it is, if someone trusts, surrenders to it, and keeps the rules in the book.
Many of us have heavy pain bodies, and one Process cycle maybe is not enough to reach to very peaceful life. So Brown said that you can go through it many times, and each time it will be deeper experience. Here are some of my experiences that I consider important:
-- Brown described life experience after Process, i. e. - living in presence, without pressure of suppressed emotions, in calmness, creativity, joy... And because of that I made basic, "beginners" mistake: I unconsciously hoped to finally resolve all my big problems (for eg. lack of self-confidence), and be happy (and happy for me meant - better me :) . It was ego-trap, because I wanted to improve myself - my ego :) There is nothing to improve, except ego, and ego is source of unhappiness. We are already perfect, but we need to remember it, awake... Spiritual awakening is death of ego...
-- I often didn't realize that I unconsciously tried to feel better. The goal, purpose is not to try to feel better, but only to feel. To feel what is real, what is now inside me, and accept that.
-- Sometimes I didn't keep the rules in the book exactly, there was force in me that wanted to do in "my way" (for eg. slightly change weekly statement to "improve it" or add some new, my statement :) We need to keep the rules exactly, to prevent our unconsciously forces to make rules and lead the process.
-- Presence invokes suppressed emotions to surface. I needed some time to learn how to surrender to emotion. I'm still learning. Suppressed emotions can be intimidating, but if we consciously and calmly accept them, they will go out, gradually leaving our inner space more and more empty... And emptiness is fullness.

Go ahead.
I wish you Presence and Peace.

Anto
Antara
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2014 12:24 pm
Location: Mostar, Bosnia and Herzegovina

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby Enlightened2B » Thu Sep 25, 2014 8:29 pm

Thanks Anto for the encouraging words. I'm going to keep up and trust the process. I read about the process in Nanci Danison's book 'Backwards'. Yet, there are soooo many options available seemingly for emotional healing that it can be overwhelming to start looking into all of the potential emotional healing modalities including energy healing. Yet, presence as our nature and working from that point forward seems to make the most sense to me as this process outlines. Waking up to presence might be all that is needed for some people. But, I think as Michael points out in his book.....improving the 'quality of our experience' means having a more conscious experience and therefore, more conscious projections which implies really going through that unconscious conditioning and bringing it to light by integration.

I like what you said about 'feeling' and I know that Michael talks about that in the book. I'll post updates on where I'm at in this thread so you can see as I move through the process.

Thanks again.
Enlightened2B
 
Posts: 1897
Joined: Wed May 15, 2013 10:51 pm
Location: New York

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby Antara » Sat Sep 27, 2014 12:59 pm

I believe, waking up to presence is all that is needed for all people (not only for some). I also was confused with overwhelming number of possibilities, offers, methods... And from my limited experience, nothing can compare with strong presence and consciousness - it burns unconscious stuff like in movies vampires are burned on daily light (that may be the origin of vampire symbol). I believe that every method of emotional and spiritual work is as much good, as it helps and leads you to your presence and consciousness, awareness.
As regards of improving quality of life experience: I don't like this word "improve" because it seduced me :) I would like say it in another way - In unconscious living we do not have real experience at all, we do not experience fully our lives. Working with unconsciousness and cleaning up suppressed negativity and emotions, it's like we are moving dirtiness from our spiritual eyes. We start to see nothing new, but what is already there. We are not improving, but more like discovering, and it is something like remembering what we already knew, but have forgotten. I believe that's the reason why we talk about "awakening".
I forgot to say, there is one book that greatly can improve understanding of suppressed emotions, and the ways of recognizing them and cleaning them: "The Primal Scream" (1970) from Arthur Janov. The book addresses pain body problem from psychotherapy aspect in a simple and clear way, understandable for most people, with many examples. For me it is really great book. Six of my friends went through "The Presence Process", and all of them read "The Primal Scream", having the same impression of the book.
Antara
 
Posts: 4
Joined: Tue Sep 23, 2014 12:24 pm
Location: Mostar, Bosnia and Herzegovina

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby Phil2 » Sat Sep 27, 2014 2:24 pm

Antara wrote:I forgot to say, there is one book that greatly can improve understanding of suppressed emotions, and the ways of recognizing them and cleaning them: "The Primal Scream" (1970) from Arthur Janov. The book addresses pain body problem from psychotherapy aspect in a simple and clear way, understandable for most people, with many examples. For me it is really great book. Six of my friends went through "The Presence Process", and all of them read "The Primal Scream", having the same impression of the book.


Right, I second that ... just reading it now ... great book indeed ...
"What irritates us about others is an opportunity to learn on ourselves"
(Carl Jung)
Phil2
 
Posts: 1379
Joined: Sat Dec 07, 2013 3:24 pm

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby Phil2 » Sat Sep 27, 2014 2:40 pm

Antara wrote:Presence invokes suppressed emotions to surface.


Very well expressed ... this is 'The Power of Now' and also the power of meditation ... this is why meditation is a healing process, and is more and more used to heal mental disorders like stress or depressions ...

Dr Jon Kabat-Zinn has been one of the first (Western) physicians to introduce 'mindfulness meditation' (as practiced by Buddhists) in the treatment of stress and depression ...

cf his excellent book :

The Mindful Way through Depression - Freeing Yourself from Chronic Unhappiness

BY MARK WILLIAMS; JOHN TEASDALE; ZINDEL SEGAL; JON KABAT-ZINN

Audio version also available on youtube:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=raBlERzb_S4

Also many conferences from Kabat-Zinn available on Youtube ...

This book explains that instead of reacting to painful events with 'experiential avoidance', which is the habitual way for our defense system to avoid painful experiences, we can instead fully live those painful emotions by observing the effects in our body (tensions, rapid breath, aches, fast heart beat etc.).

So instead of constantly repressing painful emotions, better live those fully, and doing this we can get rid of them and heal our emotional wounds.

The authors speak of switching from habitual 'doing mode' (thought, analysis, problem solving etc.) to a 'being mode', which 'allows' the emotions to be fully experienced consciously and mindfully ...

This method appears to be more 'accessible' and easier to practice than Janov's Primal Therapy, based on the same premises, but impossible to practice on your own ...
"What irritates us about others is an opportunity to learn on ourselves"
(Carl Jung)
Phil2
 
Posts: 1379
Joined: Sat Dec 07, 2013 3:24 pm

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby EnterZenFromThere » Sat Sep 27, 2014 2:59 pm

Hi Antara,

That was a lovely reply - thank you! I'm very happy my joy came through :) I feel like it's the sharing and growing in experience that is key - and we're all doing that, in our own way. Our very own way.

I'm a little confused by some of the things you've been taught in your program. Perhaps I'm missing something, or it's just that personally I don't choose to align in that particular way. But I wouldn't ever try and move myself into some kind of generic way of being, no matter how informed or respected the individual telling me to be like that. Be inspired by others, yes. But to shape myself into some kind of 'right' way of being (which is actually someone else's opinion of the 'right' way of being) doesn't appeal to me anymore. I am uniquely me, and that is part of the reason I have incarnated into this human experience. To explore this uniqueness. I am a unique expression of the One exploring itself in it's own unique way. I may choose to align and create myself in a way that is perceived by others to be 'correct' but in actuality there is no 'right' or 'wrong' only what is. What is, that is chosen by the creators that we are.

Also, I am confused about your desire not to better yourself. Isn't your participation in this program motivated by the desire to better yourself? This is a noble desire! Without it, how would you evolve? What energy would enliven your experience? Bettering yourself doesn't always mean taking from others or forcing yourself to want things. Bettering yourself can be via creating with your attention that which you desire for the purposes of the evolution into the Light of yourself and others! Without the decision to better yourself without any drive, wouldn't you just stagnate? A spiritual flatline?

I wonder about these things. About the limitations we choose for ourselves. I wonder to what extent I have released such limitations. I wonder to what extent I limit myself. I wonder what I am. I wonder how to realise the actuality of myself fuller, here in the physical. I wonder, and I evolve.

Love

Jack
User avatar
EnterZenFromThere
 
Posts: 854
Joined: Wed Dec 25, 2013 3:35 pm

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby Enlightened2B » Sat Sep 27, 2014 6:20 pm

EnterZenFromThere wrote:Hi Antara,

That was a lovely reply - thank you! I'm very happy my joy came through :) I feel like it's the sharing and growing in experience that is key - and we're all doing that, in our own way. Our very own way.

I'm a little confused by some of the things you've been taught in your program. Perhaps I'm missing something, or it's just that personally I don't choose to align in that particular way. But I wouldn't ever try and move myself into some kind of generic way of being, no matter how informed or respected the individual telling me to be like that. Be inspired by others, yes. But to shape myself into some kind of 'right' way of being (which is actually someone else's opinion of the 'right' way of being) doesn't appeal to me anymore. I am uniquely me, and that is part of the reason I have incarnated into this human experience. To explore this uniqueness. I am a unique expression of the One exploring itself in it's own unique way. I may choose to align and create myself in a way that is perceived by others to be 'correct' but in actuality there is no 'right' or 'wrong' only what is. What is, that is chosen by the creators that we are.

Also, I am confused about your desire not to better yourself. Isn't your participation in this program motivated by the desire to better yourself? This is a noble desire! Without it, how would you evolve? What energy would enliven your experience? Bettering yourself doesn't always mean taking from others or forcing yourself to want things. Bettering yourself can be via creating with your attention that which you desire for the purposes of the evolution into the Light of yourself and others! Without the decision to better yourself without any drive, wouldn't you just stagnate? A spiritual flatline?

I wonder about these things. About the limitations we choose for ourselves. I wonder to what extent I have released such limitations. I wonder to what extent I limit myself. I wonder what I am. I wonder how to realise the actuality of myself fuller, here in the physical. I wonder, and I evolve.

Love

Jack


The part I bolded in your post is sublime. You truly get it my friend.

This is one reason why I no longer resonate with some of the conventional non-dual teachings in the way I used to. After studying NDE's, it seems that our purpose and our existence here is so far different than what we've been led to believe through traditional non-duality, especially in the regards to the individual perspective that is incarnated for the purpose of exploration of that perspective. There is no doing away of the individual perspective as many teachings like to imply. Individuality is our creative expression and purpose! Yet, oneness in presence lies at the core of this individuality.

The Presence Process that Anto is referring to is merely a method of making the unconscious suppressed emotions....conscious, so our lives are not being run from that unconsciousness that's been built up over time and predominately built on fear. It's integrative work. For me personally, the less my life is run by the unconsciousness of my conditioning, the more I can approach life from this unique conscious perspective that I am. Conditioning is always a factor, but it doesn't have to be in the forefront of our existence in my opinion. Not sure if Anto is saying the same thing, but I think that's the purpose with emotional energy work.
Enlightened2B
 
Posts: 1897
Joined: Wed May 15, 2013 10:51 pm
Location: New York

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby runstrails » Sat Sep 27, 2014 9:30 pm

Hi E2B and Zen,
I don't get the 'unique perspective of Oneness' view. Could you elaborate? Here are my questions:

I think we all agree that consciousness is primary and not bound to the body (everything is appearing within awareness and awareness is needed for experience of any kind). Also, (perhaps) we agree that E2B, Zen and rt are 'fictitious' identities or roles. If this is the case, then logically, once you subtract the fictitious identities, all that remains is consciousness and it's (non-dual) contents.

So, for unique expression to happen--then the fictitious identity (person, spirit, soul whatever) needs to resurface as a real entity, and further, if this entity needs to evolve (then it suggests that 'now' is not enough and more and more is needed (i.e., we're right back to where we started from--ego not being satisfied and constantly wanting more). Have you considered that 'soul' might be a spiritual expression of the ego? Why isn't the soul satisfied when it realizes it's true identity? Why does it need to keep evolving on its own? I just can't understand that bit.

Finally, if we agree that consciousness is primary (and not limited to the body) then why are NDE's or OBE's particularly interesting? Any kind of dream or experience is possible within consciousness. period. Anything.

Now, if the point of view is from that of the limited person or fictitious identity, then I can understand how fascinating NDE's would be---wow--an out of body experience in another realm. This was my initial fascination with NDE's because I was not completely sure that consciousness was primary---I needed NDE's to show me that consciousness exists beyond the body. But that point of view was from the small self. With awakening--NDE's/OBE's don't seem any more interesting than the mystery of ordinary life.

BTW, I totally get that any world view is ultimately imagination :D. And thank you both for your positive, optimistic contributions on this forum.
runstrails
Moderator
Moderator
 
Posts: 2132
Joined: Wed Feb 10, 2010 12:33 am

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby EnterZenFromThere » Sat Sep 27, 2014 9:54 pm

I do love your willingness to express your appreciation my friend :) especially since it's directed at me! Haha!

I've had a really bumpy week so have been grounded a great deal to the degree that I get anything! My experience of myself keeps stabilising - expanding - stabilising - expanding :P ever spiralling to the root of my Being. My sense of identity has shifted so much in the last year and a half. From a human fully. To a human experiencing Presence. To a brief glimpse of actually being the Present experiencing being human. To deeper and more lasting realisations of that. To a human experiencing the Present as his own Higher Self. To a realisation that I am only my Higher Self - the One. That last one is blasting negativity out of my head so intensely I've basically spent the last week lying down! I think the point I'm trying to make is that whatever I get right now, is bound to evolve into something perspective shattering pretty soon. It's pretty humbling! Bent with that in mind, I'm glad that we align so well in our beliefs :) it's good to have a friend!

My feeling is that the majority of big names in the non-duality movement have little to no direct experiential knowledge of their own inner Truth. Some have a glimpse, like I did a year or so ago, and then go off and write books and teach others, thinking they've reached some kind of end point. Some haven't even gone that far. That said, I can think of a few who seem authentic. I'm far more impressed by everyday people facing their own fears and evolving in their own way. I see it all the time. They don't even realise what a wonderful thing they're doing. How brave and beautiful they are. I see it all the time. And it moves me so much. So authentic. Most of my inspiration comes from those not aware of spirituality as a concept, yet are still living it. That and through the wonderful people I'm meeting more and more who are not in the lime light but who are far more self aware than anyone I've seen in the non-duality scene. There are thousands of people, many of them quite young, who are popping up with their own beautiful take on their own direct deep experiences. We are living through the enlightenment of human kind. It's a wonderful time to be alive! To be a part of it! As we all are! Without exception!

Speaking of Oneness and Individuality, I've been learning things about the Earth related to that. A friend of mine says that all other species of physical life-form exist with a collective consciousness, lacking individual souls. All except humans. Earth is an experiment of individual souled forms. To see if they can 'work' (can't think of the right word) correctly. It's something to do with great growth being possible through the separation of individually souled beings. But it is risky because of, well just look at everything going in in the world! But the formula has been tweaked and it's worked! We're a success! So, I see it that we're here to embrace our individual uniqueness, while also embracing our Oneness with All. It sounds like you see it that way too :)

I don't have any problem with any method someone chooses for themselves. But I get a slight eye twitch when I see someone putting down their own beautiful, uniqueness because someone else has told them they must fit into a specific mould. Dance that dance if you like, for as long as you like, but, as someone who did, and now doesn't, I'd like to offer my perspective and advice not to. Your own Divinity is so magnificent it can easily walk it's own way, if it is allowed to. The human is the gatekeeper - the One that chooses whether or not to Allow. If it opens the gate to the Divine, the Divine flows through, and the gatekeeper is transformed into the Divine. Of course it is all Divine. But only when the gate from unknowing to Knowing is opened does the actuality of this Glorification take place. I'm pretty sure I just made that word up - but that's ok, because I Am the Divine Creator That I Am :P

Love,

Jack
User avatar
EnterZenFromThere
 
Posts: 854
Joined: Wed Dec 25, 2013 3:35 pm

Re: Pain body, pressure in the head

Postby runstrails » Sat Sep 27, 2014 10:14 pm

Zen wrote: I Am the Divine Creator That I Am :P

Now that we know we all spring from you---it's settled in my mind :wink:.
Although, if I was to anthropomorphize Brahman--I'd like it to be like you---irreverent, open and loving.
And on the same note, perhaps we need Disney movie of enlightenment with a cuddly, cute, dancing character playing Brahman!

Seriously, I agree with you about 'real' people living 'real' lives outside of spirituality. I live with one of them. My husband would be so entertained by all this and he's the most truly Zen guy I know!
runstrails
Moderator
Moderator
 
Posts: 2132
Joined: Wed Feb 10, 2010 12:33 am

Next

Return to Personal Experiences

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 1 guest