Had it-lost it-have it again.

Here you may share how the words Eckhart Tolle have affected your life.

Had it-lost it-have it again.

Postby ken36 » Mon Jan 12, 2015 10:22 pm

On2-20-1990: Family Fitness Center Anaheim, CA Working out after an AA meeting. Not a religious person, but I was struggling through "Sermon on The Mount by Emmitt Fox", only because the book was recommended by people in my group.

10:00: Resting after a set of bench presses. Looking about the very big gym. Focussed on a man resting also. Suddenly, I was filled with an overwhelming love for this man. Been very happily married for 30 years. Joy for the first time ever. Never felt anything like it before. I knew I was having a spiritual experience, and I was in the presence of God, so I wasn't frightened How did I know that I was... Cannot, of course, describe the feeling. This wonderful presence lasted for 8 days and then it left me for 25 years.
Tried for to get it back. Failed in each effort. Took A Course In Miracles for 2 years. Took ACIM twice in a row. Went to church and read the Bible. The Big Book of AA described it as "God making himself known to us." During all of 25 years I didn't get even a twinge.

Sometime in November 2014 I read about Eckhart Tolle's (TPON) and downloaded it to my kindle. I didn't even read one word and the feeling from 1990, the realization of God was back and it is STRONG, but the love and joy are not nearly as strong as in 1990. I've learned in life to take whatever I get and be thankful. I do wish the joy and love would return though. Happy New Year.
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Re: Had it-lost it-have it again.

Postby kiki » Tue Jan 13, 2015 6:02 am

Welcome to the board, ken. Thank you for sharing your story.

Looking back you can probably see how efforting to achieve what's already here is counterproductive. It's a hard lesson to learn; the mind and ego rebel at the thought that it can't take you there. More than anything it's about relaxing into "it", but the mind fights this at first.

Enjoy your stay. I look forward to reading your input and sharing your insights.

kiki
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Re: Had it-lost it-have it again.

Postby CaiHong » Wed Jan 14, 2015 12:59 am

Hi Ken,

I also attended AA for a small number of years but in the last few months I have been more focused on Eckhart Tolles teachings and have had significant results, nothing earth shattering but I am definitely more peaceful, more aware and thereby more in control of my emotions. I had been reading Eckhart Tolle earlier in my sobriety but it didn't have the impact that it is having now. Since reading Eckhart Tolle more intensely I have less desire to attend meetings and see them more as a distraction for me than anything else although the service aspect, helping another alcoholic, I feel It should attend for that reason. The bottom line is, I feel his teachings and implementing those teachings are my next step on the spiritual path.

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Re: Had it-lost it-have it again.

Postby jackiegs » Fri Jan 16, 2015 12:34 am

Ken, I really love the title of your thread! It makes me smile. That's just how it seems to be. Thank you.
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Re: Had it-lost it-have it again.

Postby ken36 » Tue Jan 27, 2015 12:23 am

That first night I woke at 3AM and my two achilles tendons were on fire with heat. My ankles had been sore and I limped when walking. The heat dissipated and my ankles were fine. Healed. I remember being frightened and at the same time awed. This was the real thing and I knew it.
Now, typing this, God is right here I feel a little conscious tingle, a vibration, something extra. If I go lie down, God will take center stage and come surging in. I guess, my conscious mind wasn't ready, for Presence 24 years ago. Now I am hungry. Bring it on.
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