I had a deeply painful childhood and was strongly identified with my extremely negative story. At age 15, I dove straight in and had used weed, alcohol, lsd, xtc, hydrocodone, oxycodone, and meth all in my first month of substance use!
17 years later (6 months ago) I started reading and watching ET and Mooji and began my journey of practicing stillness. I was currently addicted to prescription opiates, valium, and adderall (prescription amphetamine) this time. I had such a high tolerance to all of these that I never even got high at all anymore really, I was just taking it all to be normal. Due to the fact that I was no longer getting high (even though I was using, I was just maintaining) this allowed me to practice presence with a clear enough head and to start seeing major improvements in my life. I decided one night that I am done with this..truly done. I immediately began tapering off all of it. Been clean for a couple months and I haven't had a single craving! I didn't even have any while going through withdrawals which is amazing to me.
Knowing how to deal with thoughts, emotions, especially ones related to my once monster pain body, and now seeing the beauty of life has taken away my desire to escape completely. I don't have anything to run from now.
I really never thought this would be possible for me for a long time and I am filled with such gratitude
