Being There

Here you may share how the words Eckhart Tolle have affected your life.

Being There

Postby Mal2 » Mon Aug 29, 2005 4:32 am

It's great to find a place with many like minded people. I don't feel so alone :)

My journey began when I had a spiritual experience after embarking on a 12 step recovery program for Alcohol. This was totally unexpected for me and before this I had no interest nor inkling of spirituality at all.

After the experience I devoured 100s of spiritual books on many aspects of religion/spirituality seeking to understand what had happened to me. During this time after the experience my peace deepened and life was flowing like I never believed possible.

I found Eckhart's Power of Now in a bookshop one day by "accident"(I no longer believe in coincidences) and have a deep knowing that this guy is 100% "there" and the genuine article.

Around three years ago I seemed to be drawn back 100% into the thinking mind after a few very emotional work related issues. I felt as if I was coming apart inside and extremely fearful. Coming from the state of peace and bliss that I had been experiencing made this even worse.

Anyway i am not in the same job and this past 18 months I have been trying to get back to where I was, by letting go and constantly practicing presence.

I am able to keep almost constant awareness on my emotions and reactions with very little thinking at all. I am not in a state of bliss as there always seems to be an emotion going on, not painful but there all the time.

I hope this makes sense and that some of you may have similar experiences.

I'll be here often

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Postby kiki » Mon Aug 29, 2005 7:45 pm

Hi Mal,

"I am not in a state of bliss as there always seems to be an emotion going on, not painful but there all the time."

Do not look for 'bliss'. Rather than look for bliss discover what happens when completely experiencing any pain or emotion. Do not label anything, experience it fully - doing so reveals an unseen bliss within the emotion or pain itself.

Bliss is a misunderstood word for most people. Many think of bliss as some sort of ecstatic state comparable to something like sexual orgasm - such sensations are here and then are gone again. That's not it at all, although bliss certainly occurs during orgasm.

Bliss always is, it never comes and goes. Bliss is the English translation of the Sanskrit word 'ananda' - ananda is a subtle feeling/sense that all is well, that all is as it should be simply because everything that is, is. Everything is as it is, and there is no 'me' that says it should be different. There being no shoulds or shouldn'ts reveals this subtle sense. Bliss is inseparable from consciousnes, from being - it is inseparable from what you really are. So there is no need to look for it - it is here now always. It is subtle yet inescapable - it is You.
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Postby erict » Mon Aug 29, 2005 8:45 pm

kiki wrote:Bliss is inseparable from consciousnes, from being - it is inseparable from what you really are. So there is no need to look for it - it is here now always. It is subtle yet inescapable - it is You.


I've heard that said so many times, but why do I not experience that?
"Be sincere; don't ask questions out of mere interest. Ask dangerous questions—the ones whose answers could change your life."
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Postby Clare » Thu Sep 01, 2005 9:45 am

I think it may be the word 'bliss' that is misleading here.As Kiki says,
it's literal - we think it means we must always be 'happy', and so if we are not 'happy;' there must be something 'wrong'.

I am not quite sure how long or how many lifetimes I am going to have to be reminded that it is ALL okay - although I understand it right now :) I feel it and I lose it again. And that is okay. It's not something that can be kept, or held down; it is free and constant. The only thing that is a truth through any terminology we can give our experience is that ' this' is our experience, as rich and valuable as any, as all.

The wonderful spiritual teacher Gangaji - whom I think you are familiar with on this site through Eric - reminds me of this truth over and over. She explains that our spiritual development up to this point has encouraged us to look to spiritual enlightenment as a means to make our lives better, ourselves better. We do the work, read the books, and wait for the pay off, when in fact this doing something to make something better or to avoid pain defeats the object. The teaching I love so much from her is that all things have their place in our consciousness, and it's our struggle that some things are 'good' and some things are 'bad' which causes our soul the most disrest. If we just say 'it's okay', the struggle dissipates, and then we can start to feel at peace with who we are, feel the truth running beneath the experience, no matter what is going on in our lives.

I did conscious spiritual work for ten years, and then realised I'd learned nothing but a new vocabulary to describe old 'stuff' that was still going on within me. I'd learned nothing. My perfectionism and ego insecurity had just taken another turn down the road but was still leading me to the wrong place. With the help of Eckhart and other teachers, I am now learning to be okay with my negative impulses, and bless my mistakes.

For instance, I used to feel insecure and unworthy in the presence of someone of higher education and/or social status than myself - I'd just feel all crawly unworthy inside. After ten years of development, I was able to make the shift of being conscious of feeling insecure and unworthy in the presence of someone of higher education and status - observe the crawly unworthy feeling - and think to myself, "You shouldnt feel like that; that is unenlightened (and of course this relates to my childhood..blahblah.)" Now, I am finally beginning to learn to forgive my feelings of inadequacy and lack of education. In my forgiveness of these things, I am finally able to confront the taskmaster and judge regarding my own -lesser -education. In doing so, I realise the only person who makes the decision about my worthiness is me. And in doing THAT I am able to ask the deeper questions:

"If you can't be recognised as something 'as good as' the thing YOU have decided is a sign of worthiness, why do you feel that makes you not count at all?"

and, ultimately Gaganji's question : "Why do you fear annihilation?"

And then...finally! The insecurity leaves the building.

Y'see? I think it comes when we just get present with what it is we are feeling and just let it be without judging it, or tracing it. Then the Higher wisdom comes in, and we have the opportunity then to experience the situation without a struggle. We are free :)
Love,
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Postby lakeswimr » Thu Oct 13, 2005 3:11 am

erict wrote:
kiki wrote:Bliss is inseparable from consciousnes, from being - it is inseparable from what you really are. So there is no need to look for it - it is here now always. It is subtle yet inescapable - it is You.


I've heard that said so many times, but why do I not experience that?


In my case it was pain body and mind activity blocking me. Pain body is not so strong anymore but I still get caught up by mind streams a lot. (Although sometimes I'm present. :) )
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Postby kiki » Fri Oct 14, 2005 7:24 pm

"In my case it was pain body and mind activity blocking me. Pain body is not so strong anymore but I still get caught up by mind streams a lot. (Although sometimes I'm present"

So, when "pain body" seems to be here, feel it fully and unconditionally. The subtle sense of bliss is even in pain, although it may be overlooked. Pain is what it is. In the resistence to pain, the bliss of the pain is missed.

Mind stream? What notices it? Are you the mind stream or that which sees it? With this, presence is seen to always be here.

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Postby heidi » Fri Oct 14, 2005 10:28 pm

Hmmm, SimonL, sorry to see you've removed your words.
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Postby Jim » Sat Oct 15, 2005 12:10 am

Ahhh..., so that is what is meant... 'not talking'

I was wondering what 'nt' meant... and given my lack of computer lingo...

I was thinking maybe 'no time' or 'no thoughts'.., and or it is a time of 'not thinking'. Of course, given my creative imagination... thoughts began to run wild with possibilities... lol

I'll just let it go now....
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Postby heidi » Sat Oct 15, 2005 12:37 am

Oh thanks, I couldn't figure out what that meant.
never translating
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Postby erict » Sat Oct 15, 2005 12:09 pm

It meant "no text". Simon seemed to be very upset with someone on this forum he claims to know personally. His ego was terribly irritated that he was not receiving the recognition of being the great spiritual master he believes himself to be.
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