Bedtime Thank-you

Here you may share how the words Eckhart Tolle have affected your life.
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RHRippere
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Bedtime Thank-you

Post by RHRippere » Mon Jul 14, 2008 1:08 am

Lying awake in bed one night with my wife, she unloaded a common diatribe of insult. Having just read the Power of Now, I decided it was time to try it.

And, I held my tongue. I was quiet. I waited. I let her continue - writhing as I was on the inside.

Finally, her ego had finished it's cracked record piece and she/it put the script down.

After a while, and honestly, not knowing what to say to her ego, I said, "Thank you. Thank you for telling me that."

"I just want what's best for you!" she quickly rejoined.

And, again, not knowing what to say (or how her wish for "the best" had any relation to her ego's stream of insults), I said only, "I know." And I turned over and went to a sleep full of peace.

________________

I used to believe (and know) that I was ABOVE reproach. I was above and beyond any kind of critique. I practiced my own delusion that I had ARRIVED and all who hen-pecked me had not been "saved" yet. But then, after reading ET, I understood how arguing with others and defending my position, helping to protect and ensure the long-life of my (crappy) little ego, I discovered how other egos can and do say anything they want to my ego and arguing with an ego only serves to prolong and promote it.

Best to accept reproach with grace, listen presently - "leave space around it" and let the reproach and the speaker hang there in the open - dangling. Let the sound of ego-trash ring and echo in the room.

It is probably quite true that every ego has a very poor script, a bad writer - (Who comes UP with all that stuff anyway?!) but we spend so much time arguing and interrupting and covering up the poor dialogue with the next topic, the next distraction, that none of us really get a chance to appreciate how shallow and uninformed - comical, really - the ego's lines are.

I love my wife's essence, her spirit, the Life in her: But I married her ego, too - and she married mine.

lestat
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Re: Bedtime Thank-you

Post by lestat » Wed Aug 20, 2008 11:31 am

This is wonderful how you implement Tolle's teachings into your everyday life. I'm trying to remain present while standing in line. It's not easy, because ego takes it as an intentional act by others. But I work at it frequently.

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Sighclone
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Re: Bedtime Thank-you

Post by Sighclone » Wed Aug 20, 2008 7:16 pm

This thread is splendid - a good example of Tolle's perspectives. But I'm going to be a tiny bit small, only for reference: RHRippere, it was more likely your wife's pain-body that was looking for food from yours. You held off, and then her heart spoke a truth.

According to Tolle, the relationship between the pain-body and the ego is close. One can feed the other. His distinction emerged after years of counseling clients. You can't argue with a pain-body, but you can often reason with an ego...sometimes successfully, if it is not so threatened. He says, on p. 38 on PON: "The pain-body, which is the dark shadow cast by the ego, is actually afraid of the light of your consciousness."

None of my notes above diminish in any way the success of your being the space for your wife's rambling diatribe - way to go!!!!

Namaste, Andy
A person is not a thing or a process, but an opening through which the universe manifests. - Martin Heidegger
There is not past, no future; everything flows in an eternal present. - James Joyce

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