Doing and non doing

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Doing and non doing

Postby Scouser » Tue Jun 18, 2013 4:59 pm

This is something that I have some difficulty with. I can do both, as i'm sure we all do, but when non doing (other than meditation) I feel I should be doing something.

Today is a good example, I have been working hard and feel tired, physically & emotionally, what I would like to do is sat down, relax and enjoy the experience, for however long feels right. However whenever I do this, I feel I should be getting on with my music as this is what I love to do. I feel if I am to achieve my goals in this regard, it will take hard work not sitting doing nothing.

Now I know that non doing can bring about all kinds of results, ie I formulate all kinds of vital ideas about what i'm trying to do etc But the only time non doing seems agreeable is when i'm meditating. I think there is some fear attached to me not attaining my goals, which makes non doing hard to reconcile. This is playing a big part in my life and I would really like to feel more comfortable with non doing.

I can rationalise why I feel this way, but somehow feel stuck..
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Re: Doing and non doing

Postby Typist » Tue Jun 18, 2013 5:44 pm

This is what I think of as a classic "cake and eat it too" problem.

I want to lose weight, but I want to eat lots of cake too. The two incompatible desires are tugging back and forth on my mind, creating a conflict. This is an extremely common form of human problem, which we all experience on issues large and small.

A solution might be called "decisive acceptance", which is just a fancy way of saying, make a decision and then accept it.

Don't let the inner negotiations drag on and on and on. Resolve the conflict, and be done with it. Pretend that President Obama has locked us in a room with ourselves and declared, nobody is leaving this room until this matter is settled, over and done.

It's doesn't have to be all or nothing in either direction. I'll negotiate with myself, and grant myself cake eating three days a week, and stick to my diet on the other four days.

What typically happens is that we think if we put off a decision somehow the problem will go away. Whatever we decide, it will involve some compromise, some price tag, and we hope to avoid that price tag by putting off a decision. All this does is stretch the suffering out and make it last longer.

Carefully consider the options, informing ourselves with information where needed. Then make a decision, make peace with that decision, and move on.
If the things we want to hear could take us where we want to go, we'd already be there.
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Re: Doing and non doing

Postby TemporalDissonance » Tue Jun 18, 2013 6:50 pm

Scouser wrote:I can do both, as i'm sure we all do, but when non doing (other than meditation) I feel I should be doing something.


In "I feel I should be doing something" lies your answer.

Scouser wrote:I think there is some fear attached to me not attaining my goals, which makes non doing hard to reconcile......I can rationalise why I feel this way, but somehow feel stuck..


Rationalizing is an act of the mind. Non doing is beyond the mind. Reflect on your images of non doing and fears associated with them.
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