GIRLS

Talk about relationships in the context of Spiritual Enlightenment

GIRLS

Postby therock » Sat Mar 14, 2015 2:58 am

Hej guys,
I am 23 ys old, never had a girlfriend, single and virgin all my life so far.

Now because of that long time I really want this SO bad. I think about it all the time, talk to as many girls as I can and put a lot of pressure and expectations into that area.

This creates a lot of tension, inner pressure, jealousy ( of others who have girls so easily) and frustration.

Eckhart says that you have to GIVE what you want ...but how can I give something that I dont have /want soo bad.

Now more and more getting a nice a nice girl or having sex seems like such a huge thing.

Can somebody realte and maybe help ??

I would REALLY appreciate it.
:)
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Re: GIRLS

Postby stefano2015 » Mon Mar 16, 2015 1:14 pm

First you have to realize why U are in current situation and what led to it. Then try to work as hard as you can to change your attitude.
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Re: GIRLS

Postby turquoisesky » Sun Apr 19, 2015 9:39 am

Maybe talk with a psychologist. I think only a specialist can help if you don't know where the problem is.
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Re: GIRLS

Postby meetjoeblack » Sun May 24, 2015 2:25 am

therock wrote:Hej guys,
I am 23 ys old, never had a girlfriend, single and virgin all my life so far.


You are just out of your teens man. The real question is, what are you doing to change that? In my teens, I dated a bit, I had some relationships but, I always felt like I was not living up to what I should be. Probably my ego talking then. When I was your age, online dating was a niche. Now, you have online dating as a norm, tinder, and okcupid or others.

I felt like such a chode with girls. I watched and wondered, how do you do it? What do I say? One day, a friend told me about the game. I read a book and I never looked back. I talk to lots and lots of girls. I approach lots. It can be a very frustrating process. It is never ending and it all really depends on what you want. Give it all a shot. At this point, what do you have to lose?

therock wrote:Now because of that long time I really want this SO bad. I think about it all the time, talk to as many girls as I can and put a lot of pressure and expectations into that area.


Something that gets talked about in self help is, "what you resist persists." You are single. You want a gf. So be it. Do everything you can in your power to get that. Freedom from outcome. Do your part. Leave the rest to the universe.

therock wrote:This creates a lot of tension, inner pressure, jealousy ( of others who have girls so easily) and frustration./quote]

In doing cold approach pickup, I am again and again frustrated at times. I then go meditate on it.

What frustrates me was that, while I cannot relate exactly to your struggle, I recall seeing it time and time again. High school, the so called good girl running through tons of men. Here in my late twenties, the same girls now have got that out of their system and they want to play house. I am turned off by this. Many of them have kids, are divorced or have baby mama drama.

My frustration is that, if there was not for a biological clock, I feel like most would never change. What is even more challenging to my ego is to see life from a new lens, acknowledge that female biology is turned on by the alpha males, the pretty boys, the men that do not call them back or buy the ring, and women are giving it up to them. So, when a woman is at the peak of her fertility, she is with the alpha, and when she is looking to settle down, she seeks the beta. Even more alarming is that, women then lower her standards especially with age. Many have had stds from the alphas, have had some emotional or physical trauma from some of these guys. And I am suppose to be excited now she wants to date?

Feeling sorry for ourselves does not change the facts.

TheRock, it does get better with age. I date a lot more now then I did but, I also get rejected more too then I did in my teens. I talk to lots of girls and I feel nothing if a girl is not interested. I just go talk to more girls.


therock wrote:Eckhart says that you have to GIVE what you want ...but how can I give something that I dont have /want soo bad.


Overcome your obstacles in life. Go do some traveling. Go live a good life.

The question I ask myself is, what if I never get married? Never have a wife? Never have a gf ever again? How will I live a good life in a place of autonomy?

There is a youtube channel by Elliot Hulse. He talks about being the strongest version of yourself. I am looking at doing this and it is a on going process.

therock wrote:Now more and more getting a nice a nice girl or having sex seems like such a huge thing.


You make it sound like it is incredible or out of reach. These walls you build. Your doing it too yourself.

therock wrote:Can somebody realte and maybe help ??

I would REALLY appreciate it.
:)


I am familiar with what you are saying but, the truth is that, a relationship, sex, love will only complicate your life if you are not in a place of autonomy.


I have a friend who is good looking, he is muscular, square jaw line, and guess what? He is single too. He dates and gets girls but, even when we go out, what seems like is perfect or happening doesn't always workout. The girl and him seemed to hit it off. She never texted or called. Weird, if he left with her maybe something happens. I have had awesome nights out, never left with the girl, and surprise, we never talk again. I have always left with girls and it is a complete disaster.

Sex is overrated. Last weekend, my friends and I hooked up with a girl. It was dull. If you wait for chemistry, it can be lonely and a long wait. My advice would be to do everything in your power and then leg go.

therock, the biggest eye opener for me was my high school crush becoming a single mother. She went to the bar, fucked some guy who got her pregnant, and never called her. I remember how messed up my head was over that in my teens. Girls/women can be just as every bit as messed up as you or I.
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Re: GIRLS

Postby Fore » Sun May 24, 2015 2:34 pm

therock wrote:Hej guys,
I am 23 ys old, never had a girlfriend, single and virgin all my life so far.

Now because of that long time I really want this SO bad. I think about it all the time, talk to as many girls as I can and put a lot of pressure and expectations into that area.

This creates a lot of tension, inner pressure, jealousy ( of others who have girls so easily) and frustration.

Eckhart says that you have to GIVE what you want ...but how can I give something that I dont have /want soo bad.

Now more and more getting a nice a nice girl or having sex seems like such a huge thing.

Can somebody realte and maybe help ??

I would REALLY appreciate it.
:)

Why not seek the services of a professional, a specialist in these delicate matters.
Just make sure you wear a bullet proof vest. :wink:
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Re: GIRLS

Postby Baba Bozo » Wed May 27, 2015 1:19 am

therock, if you are still interested, when you are ready, return here and we will hound you until you have some new experiences.

You probably won't like the process, as it will require doing things you are not already doing, but if you are serious and not just complaining, we will make it happen together.

Having a girlfriend is as easy as buying a book in the bookstore. It requires only answering one simple question. Are you willing to pay the price?

What may be happening is that you're standing there in the bookstore with the book in your hand saying "I REALLY WANT THIS BOOK!" but then you're not willing to walk to the counter and hand over the cash.

If you're willing to pay the price, you can have a girlfriend.

If you're not willing to pay the price, you can't.

All the rest is just details.
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Re: GIRLS

Postby shine789 » Sat May 30, 2015 11:17 am

True words. Your world will never be the same again. Better think twice.
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Re: GIRLS

Postby Andreas » Sun May 31, 2015 2:46 am

Like buying books? Handing over cash? Willing to pay the price? Won't like the proccess? Your world will never be the same again?

That sounds kind of scary... Hope you guys are not some human traffickers looking for customers here ;)...
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Re: GIRLS

Postby king990 » Mon Jun 01, 2015 7:17 pm

Haha. I think I will never get married after what I read here :)
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Re: GIRLS

Postby ultimate5 » Tue Jun 02, 2015 12:19 pm

I got married... And somethimes it looks exactly like this.
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Re: GIRLS

Postby mercado » Wed Jun 03, 2015 12:00 pm

Maybe try the divorce? I think it helps :D
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Re: GIRLS

Postby michael74 » Wed Jun 03, 2015 5:39 pm

I never wanted to be married. And I think I will stay like this for a long time.
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Re: GIRLS

Postby Baba Bozo » Thu Jun 04, 2015 2:22 am

It's too bad therock wandered off, but then again, maybe he finally found what he was looking for. Hoping for that.
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Re: GIRLS

Postby DylanDude » Sun Jun 14, 2015 9:34 am

Dude look up RSDTyler on youtube. He's like the eckhart tolle version of pick up. He has great advice and is very motivating.

Start meditating if you aren't already and start going out. Eckhart tolles advice on life from his books is also great advice.

Get present to the moment. Don't play a role and enjoy the process of meeting women. All easier said than done but if you keep at it you will improve, good luck!
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Re: GIRLS

Postby Baba Bozo » Sun Jun 14, 2015 3:18 pm

The way to have a woman is to be a man. That is, face the fear and deal with it.

It doesn't require information, understanding, tactics or any of that. It requires action.

Ask every woman you meet out on a date.

Ask any way you can. Just be polite, beyond that it doesn't really matter how you say it. Just say it, that's what matters.

If she's married, apologize sincerely, and then ask if she has a single friend you might meet.

Every day.

Every woman.

Ask, ask, ask.

Print up a business card with your face and phone number, and give it and a smile to every woman you meet.

Simple.

People who start threads like this typically don't want it to be simple, because then they'd have to face the fear and act. They want it to be complicated so that they can spend years, decades even, hiding in the complications.

The best we can probably do is remind them that they either get off their ass and start asking, or they don't.
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