Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

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Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby Andyzen » Sun Nov 27, 2016 2:33 pm

I'm very unhappy at the moment and feel like my life has been one big mistake. I cannot remember the last day when I did not give serious thought to suicide. The only thing that stops me is the suffering it would cause my parents. Im lonely and regret so many things from the past. I have lost good friends, and I had a girlfriend and an amazing little step-daughter who I loved more than words can convey and losing them both set me on a path of spiritual seeking as the pain was what made me pick up the power of now. Obviously it would seem from this that the teachings have not sunk in as well as they should have but I know deep down Eckhart's teachings offer the truth.


I'm 37, single, no children, not good at all with the opposite sex( the last few years has been one rejection after another a person can only take so much). Not a huge group of friends, very small family. I work as a police officer in England so I do live a comfortable and challenging life so I am grateful for that but when I am not at work I am myself again. I look in the mirror and see someone who had failed, a loser. I am not lazy. I exercise hard, I eat well, I meditate, I play music and sing, I play sports, socialise, I take pride in my appearance but I look around at everyone else and feel I am the only one who is not a normal person. This is just too much. Whenever I see a child I'm reminded of my step daughter who I raised but can never see again and she may not even remember me. Its been 4y ears since I've seen her. All my friends have a family, children and I don't. And to make it worse, I had that and threw it away because I was a so blind to what I had. I feel like its too late for me now. All I see in the future is a continuation of now which is loneliness and pain. As I am writing these words part of me thinks I am being too negative in my thinking but I wish I could convey the disillusionment I feel it is sometimes too much to bare.
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Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby dijmart » Sun Nov 27, 2016 6:09 pm

Hi,

My advice is you need to address this depression with a therapist and/or psychologist. Knowing you are awareness and what that means is not a cure for depression. You would see you are not the depressed person you seem to be, but that may not be enough at this point, because you will still experience the pain from this depression that's set in motion, you just wouldnt identify with it in the same way. I think E.T.'s depression stopped, because his thoughts changed, but who knows.

You need a relatively stable emotional mind to do Self inquiry and be able to apprehend your true nature as awareness. So, if you need some therapy or medication, there's no shame in that first of all and second, once you start to feel more balanced with your mood you would be able to apply the teachings more readily.

I'm truly sorry about your step daughter. You probably need some grief counseling, as you had a major loss.
That was similar to a death, in the sense that you can no longer see her, which is awful.
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Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby Onceler » Sun Nov 27, 2016 8:24 pm

I agree with everything dijmart says. Take care of your emotional self before your spiritual inquiry. I made the mistake of thinking that spirituality would heal my depression and anxiety, but found that it can exacerbate it. A simple meditation such as breath counting, can be useful to sharpen your facility over attention.....but not to reach transcendence, necessarily. This increased facility with attention can help you shift away from negative content when it is too overwhelming and gives some choice in what you should focus on. I'm not recommending ignoring your emotions or problems, but rather intelligently choosing what to focus on when caught in a negative thought spiral.

I hope you turn a corner soon!
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Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby turiya » Mon Nov 28, 2016 12:00 am

Slow way down, ground awareness in your body, and listen.

When you do this, maybe you will discover that you do not need to be fixed, cured, or ‘healed'.... that you are not broken.... that you have never been unhealed.

Maybe you don't need to talk/think yourself out of your experience (... or need anyone else to talk you out of it)? Maybe you don't need any solutions, techniques, processes, medication, etc? (Or maybe you will find that you do need these things.... and there's certainly nothing wrong with that.)

But before you make any decisions, can you dwell in the spacious aliveness within you? Can you give yourself permission to be exactly as you are right this instant, without needing to be something different or experience anything differently?

"Pain is not a pathology. Sadness, grief, anxiety, depression, fear, and confusion are utterly valid and not evidence that you have failed and are unworthy of love... As you slow down and turn back into the aliveness within you, the invitation is to dare to see that you were never unhealed, that nothing is missing, and that by infusing your immediate experience with presence, with warmth, and with kindness that you can re-author the story.

You can go back into the surging feelings, emotions, and sensations that the old narrative has safeguarded you from, and see, finally, once and for all, if you still need to be protected from the raw, naked activity of life, of love, and what it truly means to be a sensitive, vulnerable, awake human being.
Not after you heal your past, not after you feel safe all the time, not after you find meaningful work, not after you find your “soulmate,” not after you replace the hopelessness with hope, and not after you find answers to all your questions. But now.

Honor the role that the dream characters have played in your life until now – the unlovable one, the unworthy one, the broken one, and the failed one. You need not go to war with these ones. You need not send them away, practice aggression toward them, heal them, or let them go. For they will let go of you when they are no longer needed to protect you from the aliveness of your own heart.

To let in the implications of this is utterly exhilarating. And completely terrifying simultaneously. One world is ending so that the true world may appear from behind the clouds of separation." -Matt Licata

Hope this helps. :-)
“We ourselves are not an illusory part of Reality; rather are we Reality itself illusorily conceived.” - Wei Wu Wei
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Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby Andyzen » Mon Nov 28, 2016 12:15 pm

dijmart wrote:Hi,

My advice is you need to address this depression with a therapist and/or psychologist. Knowing you are awareness and what that means is not a cure for depression. You would see you are not the depressed person you seem to be, but that may not be enough at this point, because you will still experience the pain from this depression that's set in motion, you just wouldnt identify with it in the same way. I think E.T.'s depression stopped, because his thoughts changed, but who knows.

You need a relatively stable emotional mind to do Self inquiry and be able to apprehend your true nature as awareness. So, if you need some therapy or medication, there's no shame in that first of all and second, once you start to feel more balanced with your mood you would be able to apply the teachings more readily.

I'm truly sorry about your step daughter. You probably need some grief counseling, as you had a major loss.
That was similar to a death, in the sense that you can no longer see her, which is awful.


Many thanks for taking the time to reply.

I came off medication about 18 months ago, after being on it for 2 years or so. I do not believe it is the answer to my situation. Regarding depression and therapist I did see someone for a while but unfortunately there are not a lot of conscious professionals in that area and the mental health care system in the UK is poor. Maybe a councilor will help, I feel I can't talk to my family or friends about this which seems like a problems in itself.

Regarding my step daughter I feel like I have learned to live with that. It still hurts every day but what can I do. Its happened, but its the overwhelming sense of regret I feel for messing up the relationship with the mother that burdens me. Thanks again for your words.
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Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby dijmart » Mon Nov 28, 2016 4:36 pm

Many thanks for taking the time to reply.


Your welcome.

I came off medication about 18 months ago, after being on it for 2 years or so. I do not believe it is the answer to my situation.


Medication for psych issues can be tricky, since often times a person will feel better while taking them, then convince themselves they no longer need them and then go off of them. Which can then lead to another downward spiral that may not be recognized as a consequence of going off the medication in the first place. Not saying this is what happened in your case, but it's often what happens with psych meds.

Maybe a councelor will help, I feel I can't talk to my family or friends about this which seems like a problems in itself.


That's a biggie right there! So, yeah, I would talk to a councelor or therapist (they're the same to me), if I were you. You need to get whatevers bothering you out of your head with some talk therapy.

Its happened, but its the overwhelming sense of regret I feel for messing up the relationship with the mother that burdens me.


Regret and guilt does absolutely nothing, but keep you paralyzed in a mode of suffering. Learn from your mistake, process it in your mind (with the help of counseling) and move forward. Excepting loss, in one form or another is part of life, whether it be from our own doing or some other reason.

You don't deserve to suffer because you made a mistake, you will need to let it go at some point. Try to watch when the negative thoughts are arising, be the watcher of them, try to apply the opposite thought when you can. Example- I'm a failure for ruining my relationship. "Opposite thought"- Im not a failure, I made a mistake. Mistakes happen when you don't know any better. When you know better, you do better.

Keep applying opposite thoughts and refuse to allow the negative thoughts to take over. Focus your attention into the body or the breath to distract your mind after you've applied the "opposite" thought, if you need to. Your probably in a pattern of negative thinking and you need to break this cycle consciously.
It's going to take time for this to work, so be patient with yourself, if you catch afterward that you "became" the thought, instead of watching the thought arise, then apply the opposite thought afterwards. Then shift your attention to the body or breath , to slow any further negative thoughts. If it doesn't work straight away, just keep repeating.

Now what I had just been referring to were irrational negative thoughts, the thoughts dont need worked through anymore. The kind that are just there to make you suffer. However, not all thought is like this, so if a thought arises that needs looked at or examined more closely, to learn or know something, then they may need handled differently. But I get the sense that at this time those are not the thoughts that are arising for you, making your suffer.
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Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby Webwanderer » Mon Nov 28, 2016 5:50 pm

Andyzen, life in this human experience is not an accident. It has purpose. I'm not talking so much about an individual purpose, but a general purpose. One aspect is to learn how to manage our emotions, and as painful as it is, there is much to be gained in finding your way through this painful time. The answer is not in resistance to what is currently present as your life experience, but in inclusion of your experience and finding a way to make yourself better. To the degree you can embrace the experience, apply the insights it has to offer, and feel your way to the growth that is inherent in it, you can get through this and become better for it.

Know that there is a greater reality from which you came (and which the greater part of you still resides) that knows there is much to be gained by exploring these types of conditions. Think eternally. You can get a sense of this greater purpose in (mentally) silent moments when your feeling nature is open to the insights from your true/greater nature. Understand, I'm offering a context that puts the pain we all go through in life in a perspective that empowers us to get through it by inclusion, acceptance, and application of a greater vision. This greater vision is available to anyone willing to align with their own true nature and being, and sense the insights that come from that alignment.

Self-judgment and condemnation are the antithesis of that alignment as our true nature does not condemn nor judge, but only loves and appreciates. Know that you are loved and appreciated by that which matters most. And whether you contribute intentionally to overcoming or not, you remain loved unconditionally. My own experience is that when I stopped condemning myself for the missteps I made, and trusted the insights that came from that greater perspective, life improved and became ever more joyful.

Nothing we have done matters more than who we are. We are extensions of unconditional love willing to explore an environment that has all manner of painful and joyful potential. Both have much to offer in terms of evolution and growth consciousness. In many ways you are a hero for being willing to take the emotional risks inherent in this world. All of Life benefits by the evolution and growth inherent in these intense experiences. An important part of that growth is learning how to move beyond them through inclusion, acceptance and appreciation for the beauty of the process. Yes, it can be painful at times. But it can also be joyful when we feel the growth of understanding that comes from incorporating life experience into who we are with appreciation over unnecessary self-condemnation.

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Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby Admiral Akmir » Tue Nov 29, 2016 3:24 am

Here are some things to get you thinking:

I'm very unhappy at the moment and feel like my life has been one big mistake.


What are you gaining by replaying the past? Does it make you happy? It would seem not. Are you able to change it? No... Perhaps you don't want to let go of the things you have lost. Do you think life is binary? Is there only one path? You have lost some things, some opportunities, friends, family... But have you lost everything in life forever? Doors open and close all the time, the shutting of some should not blind you to the opening of others.

I cannot remember the last day when I did not give serious thought to suicide. The only thing that stops me is the suffering it would cause my parents. Im lonely and regret so many things from the past. I have lost good friends, and I had a girlfriend and an amazing little step-daughter who I loved more than words can convey and losing them both set me on a path of spiritual seeking as the pain was what made me pick up the power of now. Obviously it would seem from this that the teachings have not sunk in as well as they should have but I know deep down Eckhart's teachings offer the truth.


Imagine that you are on a stage, taking part in a play, a true tragedy. This play never ends, and the drama never seems to have an end either. Now imagine that someone were to point out to you, that this stage does have an exit. You might begin to realize that you have a choice in participating in these plays. You have a choice in being a part of the drama, the tragedy... You can perform, or you can walk off the stage and say no. The plays will continue to go on, but you always have a choice to participate or not.

This is the power of the teachings, it's not about reading the book and becoming cured, it's about realizing the truth, that our lives were not what we thought they once were.

At some point in time, you decided to make an agreement with yourself; "I am a failure". The stage was set and you went out and performed for a grand audience. And who is this audience? Yourself. You perform this play of great drama and tragedy over and over again, but you have the choice not to. Will the stage still be there? Yes. Do you have a choice to be on it? You certainly do. We can't control our thoughts, they will come and go, but we have a choice in whether or not we engage them. The next time you look in the mirror and want to call yourself worthless, make the choice to say no to that story. Be impeccable with your word. You have the power to destroy and create.


I'm 37, single, no children, not good at all with the opposite sex( the last few years has been one rejection after another a person can only take so much). Not a huge group of friends, very small family. I work as a police officer in England so I do live a comfortable and challenging life so I am grateful for that but when I am not at work I am myself again. I look in the mirror and see someone who had failed, a loser. I am not lazy. I exercise hard, I eat well, I meditate, I play music and sing, I play sports, socialise, I take pride in my appearance but I look around at everyone else and feel I am the only one who is not a normal person. This is just too much. Whenever I see a child I'm reminded of my step daughter who I raised but can never see again and she may not even remember me. Its been 4y ears since I've seen her. All my friends have a family, children and I don't. And to make it worse, I had that and threw it away because I was a so blind to what I had. I feel like its too late for me now. All I see in the future is a continuation of now which is loneliness and pain. As I am writing these words part of me thinks I am being too negative in my thinking but I wish I could convey the disillusionment I feel it is sometimes too much to bare.


You cannot give what you do not have. How can you hope to have successful and loving relationships when you do not love yourself? How can you hope to give something which is absent and foreign to you?

I am not trying to insult you, but instead pointing out that you must first help yourself before you can offer yourself to another. Family, friends, a partner it doesn't matter, you cannot give to others what you do not have in yourself first.

You're single, you have time to focus on yourself, to ask the big questions and go on a fantastic journey of change. Re read everything you have posted. How much of it is really true? How much of it exists outside of your own mind? Discover all of the agreements you've made with yourself, and realize that they're only true as long as you choose to keep believing in them. You are a physical body, and you are alive, those two things are the only real truth that there is.

Think about this also; I can describe to you a fabulous restaurant that you might not have heard of. I can tell you about the food, the atmosphere, and you might be able to go and tell other people about what I told you, but you cannot claim to have eaten there, that would be a lie. The teachings are a telling, a sign post, pointing you in a direction that you weren't aware of before. You can't just read the words on the pages and be cured of unhapiness, you have to start walking in the direction that sign is pointing, and walk the path for yourself. I would look into the works of Adyashanti, Don Miguel Ruiz, Ralph Smart and Byron Katie. Don't stop with Tolle, every teacher has something to offer.
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Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby rachMiel » Tue Nov 29, 2016 8:39 am

I'm sorry for your suffering and hope you soon feel better.
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Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby Andyzen » Wed Nov 30, 2016 12:51 pm

dijmart wrote:
Many thanks for taking the time to reply.


Your welcome.

I came off medication about 18 months ago, after being on it for 2 years or so. I do not believe it is the answer to my situation.


Medication for psych issues can be tricky, since often times a person will feel better while taking them, then convince themselves they no longer need them and then go off of them. Which can then lead to another downward spiral that may not be recognized as a consequence of going off the medication in the first place. Not saying this is what happened in your case, but it's often what happens with psych meds.

Maybe a councelor will help, I feel I can't talk to my family or friends about this which seems like a problems in itself.


That's a biggie right there! So, yeah, I would talk to a councelor or therapist (they're the same to me), if I were you. You need to get whatevers bothering you out of your head with some talk therapy.

Its happened, but its the overwhelming sense of regret I feel for messing up the relationship with the mother that burdens me.


Regret and guilt does absolutely nothing, but keep you paralyzed in a mode of suffering. Learn from your mistake, process it in your mind (with the help of counseling) and move forward. Excepting loss, in one form or another is part of life, whether it be from our own doing or some other reason.

You don't deserve to suffer because you made a mistake, you will need to let it go at some point. Try to watch when the negative thoughts are arising, be the watcher of them, try to apply the opposite thought when you can. Example- I'm a failure for ruining my relationship. "Opposite thought"- Im not a failure, I made a mistake. Mistakes happen when you don't know any better. When you know better, you do better.

Keep applying opposite thoughts and refuse to allow the negative thoughts to take over. Focus your attention into the body or the breath to distract your mind after you've applied the "opposite" thought, if you need to. Your probably in a pattern of negative thinking and you need to break this cycle consciously.
It's going to take time for this to work, so be patient with yourself, if you catch afterward that you "became" the thought, instead of watching the thought arise, then apply the opposite thought afterwards. Then shift your attention to the body or breath , to slow any further negative thoughts. If it doesn't work straight away, just keep repeating.

Now what I had just been referring to were irrational negative thoughts, the thoughts dont need worked through anymore. The kind that are just there to make you suffer. However, not all thought is like this, so if a thought arises that needs looked at or examined more closely, to learn or know something, then they may need handled differently. But I get the sense that at this time those are not the thoughts that are arising for you, making your suffer.


Thank you again and that's very good advice.

And to be honest I am much more aware of my negative thoughts than a I used to be and I have certainly improved in not letting them take over. Its strange though, about 4-5 months ago I went through a period where my bad days were once or twice in a month and I thought I had cracked it, but now its the opposite. I think maybe its because my age is dawning on me. I used to have TIME (there is that word) but now I feel like I don't and all there is no chance for me to have a normal life anymore. Just a couple of thoughts crept in earlier and my mood went from fine to despair.

I do However now, because the pain is worse make conscious choices to not feel bad, to not let my life situation get the better of me but sometimes I fail. I feel like its sometimes too much for me to deal with. I look around and feel everyone is a normal person except me, like the universe made a mistake when I was created or that my only purpose was to suffer. It may sounds a though I am stuck in self pity but I wish I could convey how pro active I am in trying to feel better. I work hard, I exercise, eat well, read many spiritual books. My journey to work is 30 minutes there and back and I listen to Eckhart's tapes most days.
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Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby Andyzen » Wed Nov 30, 2016 1:15 pm

Admiral Akmir wrote:Here are some things to get you thinking:

I'm very unhappy at the moment and feel like my life has been one big mistake.


What are you gaining by replaying the past? Does it make you happy? It would seem not. Are you able to change it? No... Perhaps you don't want to let go of the things you have lost. Do you think life is binary? Is there only one path? You have lost some things, some opportunities, friends, family... But have you lost everything in life forever? Doors open and close all the time, the shutting of some should not blind you to the opening of others.


I know that replaying the past is totally anti productive. I certainly think I have not totally let go of the past, its been 4 years since my relationship break up and I think I have kept it alive in my head. I feel it was a gift from god. it was everything I ever wanted and I messed it up. So it would seem as I am writing this its the sense of regret that keeps it alive in my mind.

I cannot remember the last day when I did not give serious thought to suicide. The only thing that stops me is the suffering it would cause my parents. Im lonely and regret so many things from the past. I have lost good friends, and I had a girlfriend and an amazing little step-daughter who I loved more than words can convey and losing them both set me on a path of spiritual seeking as the pain was what made me pick up the power of now. Obviously it would seem from this that the teachings have not sunk in as well as they should have but I know deep down Eckhart's teachings offer the truth.


Imagine that you are on a stage, taking part in a play, a true tragedy. This play never ends, and the drama never seems to have an end either. Now imagine that someone were to point out to you, that this stage does have an exit. You might begin to realize that you have a choice in participating in these plays. You have a choice in being a part of the drama, the tragedy... You can perform, or you can walk off the stage and say no. The plays will continue to go on, but you always have a choice to participate or not.

This is the power of the teachings, it's not about reading the book and becoming cured, it's about realizing the truth, that our lives were not what we thought they once were.

At some point in time, you decided to make an agreement with yourself; "I am a failure". The stage was set and you went out and performed for a grand audience. And who is this audience? Yourself. You perform this play of great
drama and tragedy over and over again, but you have the choice not to. Will the stage still be there? Yes. Do you have a choice to be on it? You certainly do. We can't control our thoughts, they will come and go, but we have a choice in whether or not we engage them. The next time you look in the mirror and want to call yourself worthless, make the choice to say no to that story. Be impeccable with your word. You have the power to destroy and create.[quote/]

You are totally correct. And sometimes I succeed in this. Its very difficult, its like the whole world is telling me I am a failure. But I know the truth of the teaching is the words will tell you all kinds of things that have no basis in reality. I try so hard in life to be a good, honest and strong person and I must admit there is a part of me that thinks life had treated me unfairly.


I'm 37, single, no children, not good at all with the opposite sex( the last few years has been one rejection after another a person can only take so much). Not a huge group of friends, very small family. I work as a police officer in England so I do live a comfortable and challenging life so I am grateful for that but when I am not at work I am myself again. I look in the mirror and see someone who had failed, a loser. I am not lazy. I exercise hard, I eat well, I meditate, I play music and sing, I play sports, socialise, I take pride in my appearance but I look around at everyone else and feel I am the only one who is not a normal person. This is just too much. Whenever I see a child I'm reminded of my step daughter who I raised but can never see again and she may not even remember me. Its been 4y ears since I've seen her. All my friends have a family, children and I don't. And to make it worse, I had that and threw it away because I was a so blind to what I had. I feel like its too late for me now. All I see in the future is a continuation of now which is loneliness and pain. As I am writing these words part of me thinks I am being too negative in my thinking but I wish I could convey the disillusionment I feel it is sometimes too much to bare.


You cannot give what you do not have. How can you hope to have successful and loving relationships when you do not love yourself? How can you hope to give something which is absent and foreign to you?

I am not trying to insult you, but instead pointing out that you must first help yourself before you can offer yourself to another. Family, friends, a partner it doesn't matter, you cannot give to others what you do not have in yourself first.

You're single, you have time to focus on yourself, to ask the big questions and go on a fantastic journey of change. Re read everything you have posted. How much of it is really true? How much of it exists outside of your own mind? Discover all of the agreements you've made with yourself, and realize that they're only true as long as you choose to keep believing in them. You are a physical body, and you are alive, those two things are the only real truth that there is.

Think about this also; I can describe to you a fabulous restaurant that you might not have heard of. I can tell you about the food, the atmosphere, and you might be able to go and tell other people about what I told you, but you cannot claim to have eaten there, that would be a lie. The teachings are a telling, a sign post, pointing you in a direction that you weren't aware of before. You can't just read the words on the pages and be cured of unhapiness, you have to start walking in the direction that sign is pointing, and walk the path for yourself. I would look into the works of Adyashanti, Don Miguel Ruiz, Ralph Smart and Byron Katie. Don't stop with Tolle, every teacher has something to offer.


You are right. And as I write these words I think I have not totally surrendered to my situation and some part of me still is addicted to the negative feelings. My ego wants to be this big failure.

Can I ask you a question though, please do not think this is idle self pitying because this seems to be turning into therapy rather than discussing Eckhart's teaching but I cannot tell this to a friend or family member.

I had no friends at school, not bright and had no girlfriend until well into my 20's, very skinny, shy,. I build on my confidence, worked hard in the gym to gain a good physique, made lots of new friends, and got a job as a police officer which is what I always wanted. I became more outgoing and had quite a few romantic interactions common to someone of that age. I bought my own apartment and met a girl wo seemed to be everything I was waiting for. I became her daughters father and loved her as my own. 4 years ago I messed all that up (I did not cheat or do anything bad I neglected her so she went with someone else) and because of mutual friends lost a lot of good friends in the process because I felt ashamed of myself. I am now 37, on my own and feel that it is not possible to recover. All the confidence I build has gone and in some degrees is worse than when I was a teenager. And I feel like its now too late for me. Is it possible for anyone to recover from this?
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Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby Andyzen » Wed Nov 30, 2016 1:25 pm

Webwanderer wrote:Andyzen, life in this human experience is not an accident. It has purpose. I'm not talking so much about an individual purpose, but a general purpose. One aspect is to learn how to manage our emotions, and as painful as it is, there is much to be gained in finding your way through this painful time. The answer is not in resistance to what is currently present as your life experience, but in inclusion of your experience and finding a way to make yourself better. To the degree you can embrace the experience, apply the insights it has to offer, and feel your way to the growth that is inherent in it, you can get through this and become better for it.

Know that there is a greater reality from which you came (and which the greater part of you still resides) that knows there is much to be gained by exploring these types of conditions. Think eternally. You can get a sense of this greater purpose in (mentally) silent moments when your feeling nature is open to the insights from your true/greater nature. Understand, I'm offering a context that puts the pain we all go through in life in a perspective that empowers us to get through it by inclusion, acceptance, and application of a greater vision. This greater vision is available to anyone willing to align with their own true nature and being, and sense the insights that come from that alignment.

Self-judgment and condemnation are the antithesis of that alignment as our true nature does not condemn nor judge, but only loves and appreciates. Know that you are loved and appreciated by that which matters most. And whether you contribute intentionally to overcoming or not, you remain loved unconditionally. My own experience is that when I stopped condemning myself for the missteps I made, and trusted the insights that came from that greater perspective, life improved and became ever more joyful.

Nothing we have done matters more than who we are. We are extensions of unconditional love willing to explore an environment that has all manner of painful and joyful potential. Both have much to offer in terms of evolution and growth consciousness. In many ways you are a hero for being willing to take the emotional risks inherent in this world. All of Life benefits by the evolution and growth inherent in these intense experiences. An important part of that growth is learning how to move beyond them through inclusion, acceptance and appreciation for the beauty of the process. Yes, it can be painful at times. But it can also be joyful when we feel the growth of understanding that comes from incorporating life experience into who we are with appreciation over unnecessary self-condemnation.

WW



Thank you so much. That Is beautifully written and insightful.

As I read that I thinks maybe I am not working as hard as I think I am to get through this. Thanks again.
Andyzen
 
Posts: 27
Joined: Thu Jul 24, 2014 5:54 pm

Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby maaref » Sat Dec 03, 2016 11:15 am

The best advise I can give you is drop everything. Know yourself as the ultimate self who is perfect by itself (nothing can add to that perfection nor subtract from it). Therefore, you have no desires nor demands to better yourself because you are perfect the way you are. Stay in this place of emptiness and never fight your thoughts. Just be aware of them without engaging. Stay as the higher self.

As eckhart would say:

1. No attachment.
2. No entanglement.
3. No inner resistance.
4. No judgement

This would mean you accept the situation as it is with no resistance and no judgement. From this place of inner peace you can do anything you feel would support your peaceful state of mind. If engaging in an activity stresses you out, avoid it. If staying with a group of friends that are noisy and indulge in selfish acts avoid it. Instead, you can do stuff that would support your peaceful state of mind, such as engaging in an activity you like, like a hobby or exercising.

Supporting your mental state would come easy for you once you have found the state of peace I just described.
maaref
 
Posts: 47
Joined: Sat Dec 03, 2016 9:45 am

Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby Andyzen » Tue Dec 06, 2016 8:21 pm

maaref wrote:The best advise I can give you is drop everything. Know yourself as the ultimate self who is perfect by itself (nothing can add to that perfection nor subtract from it). Therefore, you have no desires nor demands to better yourself because you are perfect the way you are. Stay in this place of emptiness and never fight your thoughts. Just be aware of them without engaging. Stay as the higher self.

As eckhart would say:

1. No attachment.
2. No entanglement.
3. No inner resistance.
4. No judgement

This would mean you accept the situation as it is with no resistance and no judgement. From this place of inner peace you can do anything you feel would support your peaceful state of mind. If engaging in an activity stresses you out, avoid it. If staying with a group of friends that are noisy and indulge in selfish acts avoid it. Instead, you can do stuff that would
support your peaceful state of mind, such as engaging in an activity you like, like a hobby or exercising.

Supporting your mental state would come easy for you once you have found the state of peace I just described.




Many thanks. That is very helpful.

Thank you for taking the time to do offer help.
Andyzen
 
Posts: 27
Joined: Thu Jul 24, 2014 5:54 pm

Re: Can anyone offer advice for my depression?

Postby maaref » Tue Dec 06, 2016 8:58 pm

Andyzen wrote:
maaref wrote:The best advise I can give you is drop everything. Know yourself as the ultimate self who is perfect by itself (nothing can add to that perfection nor subtract from it). Therefore, you have no desires nor demands to better yourself because you are perfect the way you are. Stay in this place of emptiness and never fight your thoughts. Just be aware of them without engaging. Stay as the higher self.

As eckhart would say:

1. No attachment.
2. No entanglement.
3. No inner resistance.
4. No judgement

This would mean you accept the situation as it is with no resistance and no judgement. From this place of inner peace you can do anything you feel would support your peaceful state of mind. If engaging in an activity stresses you out, avoid it. If staying with a group of friends that are noisy and indulge in selfish acts avoid it. Instead, you can do stuff that would
support your peaceful state of mind, such as engaging in an activity you like, like a hobby or exercising.

Supporting your mental state would come easy for you once you have found the state of peace I just described.




Many thanks. That is very helpful.

Thank you for taking the time to do offer help.



I am glad you found it helpful. It brings me tremendous joy to hear that. Feel free to message me should you wish to discuss anything at all.
maaref
 
Posts: 47
Joined: Sat Dec 03, 2016 9:45 am


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